I thought I was a feminist until someone showed me this forum.

I have loved this board. I still love this board. I think it is one of the best places on the interweb.

I don't post much, but read much.

I am shocked at the accusation of goading MNHQ.

I don't post much in FWR but I lurk and read a lot. I've learned loads and even if I don't agree with everything I read, it's massively expanded my feminist horizons. I'd like to thank those regulars like Buffy, Flora, Basil, Jeanne and many, many other lovely women who generously give their time to support and help others.

Yes, it's challenging at times, but never actively unpleasant (unless I've missed all those threads somehow). I do wonder if some posters find it too challenging and then characterise their discomfort as other people being 'rude' , either because that's easier than having to think about it, or possibly they're just not used to being disagreed with.

Whatever. I do know in the 10 years I've been MNing that I could have c&p-ed the above response many times over to these semi-annual pile on threads and it's getting ever so slightly tedious.

if you've experienced violence you need to allow yourself to shout 'that was WRONG' in your head. Reading women being assertive helped me do that.

That was lovely :) :)

Much better Buffy thank you.

It also really helped me reading women being loud/strident/etc here, because IRL women are expected to be such peacemakers and if you've experienced violence you need to allow yourself to shout 'that was WRONG' in your head. Reading women being assertive helped me do that.

Basically I think FWR rocks although I don't post too often.

"There's a loose, informal group of very well-informed, intelligent posters who give a great deal of thought to gender politics. It's quite a feminist powerhouse, and imo a massive privilege to have access to them for free."

Absolutely agree.

Really saddened by the way that MNHQ have handled these last few posts too.

OP - you've done it now. You've split the feminist movement right down the middle. Things fall apart, the centre cannot hold, and mankind can breath again, safe in the knowledge that the matriarchy, the evil tyranny of shouty women, has been averted at the last moment.

swan.

• I agree with all 7 of Hak's points, precisely.

• Strident means squeaky. It was first used as a put-down regarding a feminist demo. The fact that people now think it means shouty improves nothing.

• There is group-think of a sort in this forum. There's a loose, informal group of very well-informed, intelligent posters who give a great deal of thought to gender politics. It's quite a feminist powerhouse, and imo a massive privilege to have access to them for free.

Somebody coming along to say we've already got equality, nothing needs doing, being a stripper empowers women's rights or pink is the only colour for girls, will be questioned. Obviously because opinions like that run counter to what the vast majority of feminists believe. If such posters can argue for their position in a credible way, a lively discussion ensues and at least one person might change their mind about something.

If the challenger cannot accept that different people are allowed to have different views, that one woman's experience doesn't reflect all women's experiences, or that anyone is allowed to say she's talking bollocks, then she might stomp off and start another thread about what bullies The Feminists are.

However, she's likely to find she doesn't much enjoy MN as a whole tbh. This is an unusual website in that it features a high proportion of articulate female contributors with sufficient mutual respect to argue robustly. Girls who like girls to coo gently at one another rarely stick around here. Coz we is vipers, innit

Well exactly, PomeralLights.

I read around FWR for a while before I posted on it. I'm doing the same with another board at the moment relating to my personal life.

Oh my. Another one of these threads :( I started using mumsnet when I got pregnant last year. I found FWR when I was struggling to cope with antenatal depression due to a history of rape and sexual assault.
FWR saved me from my guilt complex and gave me strength to know that rape is rape regardless of apologists and that it is endemic the way it is because of the fucking patriarchy.
I'm getting pretty bloody sick of some of the wonderful FWR regulars who's words are saving people like me from depression and suicidal thoughts being slated because people think they're a bit aggressive or argumentative. Sorry to be dismissive but boo bloody hoo.
I third the support of buffy; cailin is awesome, and though I find i don't gel with the way yonic posts I don't lose any sleep over it.
I don't know why anyone new here would start a goady thread like this without having a deep read around FWR first.

And from now on the "feminists are nasty bullies" brigade will have proof positive- because Mumsnet agrees.

Pah.

Just wow.

Whaaat? Really, Helen? That poster was being really unfair (am I allowed to say this?) and Buffy was responding in her usual measured way.

It wasn't troll hunting. It was pointing out that on this thread that poster wasn't posting in good faith. ie, they were being deliberately goady, notwithstanding posting on here since the beginning of time.

I await deletion

So you're not even allowed to talk about troll hunting? Even if it's to say you haven't done it? [Hmm]

I reported my post above and asked MNHQ to explain the deletion. Talk about silencing . . .

It's not like it's all feminism, it's just people don't like mumsnet's version of feminism. They find it very white, middle classed, from what I have read. They also don't like the perceived clique. There are plenty of other forums around.

I think on all topics, the same threads pop up again and again. So it's not that surprising that this topic is up again.

If only we could, King

Though the OP had a certain slant, the discussion had broadened until someone popped on to take Buffy to task about some other threads.