Adultery and feminism?

as pps have said, not very choice you make as a feminist is a feminist choice. My personal feminism wouldn't lead me to make the choice to sleep with another person's partner.

My personal feminism would also lead me to wonder if you only have your adulterous husband's word for what this woman does/says/thinks? Because I don't think that's necessarily the most accurate source.

Sorry you're having such a shit time.

I don't think feminism has much to do with it, unless there's a claim that adultery is morally different if it's a single man having an affair with a married woman rather than a single woman and a married man.

Then again--are its results different? If a woman finds out that her husband has broken his promises to her, but she has children to worry about, maybe she's in a weaker position regarding what happens next, versus a man if the roles were reversed. But that makes the anti-feminist assumption that a woman might kick her husband out and keep the children, while a man would never do the equivalent. In theory men are parents as much as women are, but in the real world, it rarely seems to work out evenly.

Of course, if a person breaks an important promise and another person encourages them to do it--that's not saying anything good about either of them. Maybe that's a feminist angle, that a woman ought to recognize that another woman is in a vulnerable position, and not do anything that would injure her. Or maybe that's asking too much.

I am really sorry your husband cheated on you.

This isn't related to feminism. Feminism is about giving women choices to the extent that they currently have or previously had fewer choices than men (for example, protection to return to work after pregnancies) not about validating every choice a woman makes.

You might want to post on Relationships if you want support re your husband's affair.

I don't think the issues are really as linked as all that. I don't think people's sexual behaviour has much to do with their politics.

I totally get how pissed off you rightly are, but objectively I don't see how it is a feminist issue. If feminism is about equality regardless of gender, the issue would perhaps be about her behaviour being bad 'because she was a woman' rather than her behaviour being bad as a human being.