Feminist Pub 16: where the Bluestockings develop armoured stockings to deal with the thousand paper cuts

Another example of gender delusion.

I had a discussion once with a friend about whether our "obsession" with sex discrimination (ie, not wanting to get a raw deal because we are women) cloud our judgement. I think it's the other way round - I think if you don't think about whether you are discriminating or not then it clouds your judgement. Eg, if you think X will do this or like that because she/he is a woman/man, instead of actually thinking whether X as an individual will do this or not, then your judgement is unsound. IYKWIM.

Thank you, and for the work-kick.

Oooh, how exciting. Have fun.

Though if Dr Buffy needs you to do work then Do Your Work First.

Eeeeee, I've got a date today, and I've got butterflies.

And I should be writing my lectures and collaborating with Dr Buffy.

On the subject of eyelashes, I had a long and confusing conversation with my five year old recently where it turned out that she thought only girls had eyelashes, because that's how it's done in cartoons. I had to suggest that she take a closer look at her father and brother....

meddows? taylor. oops.

No. You can't. My boy's always been called a girl, he's too pretty. And some of the cross dressers show that you wouldn't even necessarily be able to tell from the face alone in adulthood too (not many I admit!) Remember Queen's Roger Meddows?

I think it's partly because adults want to think we can tell boy and girl babies apart visually. We really can't, can we?! But even on MN, I've heard people insisting that they can tell, and girls under three look entirely different from boys. I really don't think they reliably do, except in terms of clothing? Not on here, but somone told me my DN's eyelashes made it obvious she was a girl.

She is a girl. I'm fairly sure it's not about her eyelashes.

I have people thinkng my boy, 3, is a girl all the time. I just smile and say yes he has lovely hair hasn't he (its shoulder length and a bit curly). Had an odd comment once or twice, but nothng worse. It doesn't matter when they're that age fgs!

I'm glad other people saw that blog and thought it was a bit shit. Some people really need to be reminded that they are babies, not dolls. I really really wish this british obsession with looks would fade back out again. I just about remember when we laughed at the americans for that and their obsession with celebs too.

I didn't feel judged, sorry, I just read back what I put and it sounded sulky. And now I sound pathetic. Ah well, what else is the internet for.

I had a baldy and one that was basically a small ape, he didn't so much have hair as a pelt. They both had long hair when they were little boys, lots of people thought they were girls (esp DS2 with his glorious curls bastard ) Their penises did not fall off, they didn't suddenly become girls and not a single shit was given. I sort of get where the blogger is coming from, but in about 5 years time she will reread that and cringe.

Please ignore my final comment, it was petty and unnecessary.

Just pitch in on DLS, LordC! Let not lack of knowledge be your barrier!

I had bald babies. I never much cared if people got their sex wrong. It was an interesting experiment in stereotyping though. People said different things when they thought DD2 especially was a boy.

It is all about gender as your defining attribute isn't it.

Basically, Penguins, both the blog and all the following comments are just an endless wail from mothers who had girls with not enough hair or boys with too much hair, who had to endure endless streams of people getting their child's gender wrong. Even if they dressed them fully appropriately in pink or blue and stuck flowery head bands on them. I suppose I should be happy for them all that that was the greatest challenge they faced in their child's babyhood.

And you know what also annoys me - I'm actually nervous about posting this in case elis comes back and starts on at me bitching behind people's backs again.

It was "blog of the day" on Friday but has stayed up for the weekend.

I did see the nanny one, but suspected it would enrage me so I didn't read it. If you read the opinions of any kind of "expert", I'm doing parenting all wrong. Don't care.

I was going to post something interesting on the DLS thread but realise I've only picked up Strong Poison again just now and can't remember enough to compare with the TV series...

Have you seen the one that has some British nanny saying the 5 things modern parents get wrong? Came around a few times on FB. Not especially a feminist issue (though "mum" does seem to make a lot of mistakes), but somehow gives me the rage.

I haven't seen it. Sounds suitably facile from the title.

I wonder how long that "17 things only mothers of bald girls will understand" blog link will stay up. Because it gives me the rage every time I see it. Oh, goddess forbid that a) a child should display any kind of non-stereotypical characteristics so that its gender is not clearly and absolutely advertised at all times and b) anyone should ever get that gender wrong.

FFS.

Grace Hopper was fab.

It's depressing how many early computer people were women, and they sort of got written out of history. Almost, anyway.

Talking about software bugs with the DC reminded me of Grace Hopper.