Feminist Pub 14: The Bluestocking, a place for feminist chat and feminists to chat

Congratulations, Karma! Here's to a lovely time with a snuggly newborn feminist.

Welcome to the world baby Karma

Hello all! I haven't caught up from the last pub yet but I'd just like to put in an order for a LARGE gin and tonic and a place in the creche please.

My little baby feminist was born on Saturday

She is amazing. And makes me want to ensure that the world is a good place for her to grow up in. tries to avoid hormonal happy weeping into gin

Flora I heard that and was equally irritated

I can't bear to venture into that thread. Sorry you had to read that bullshit MEOD

I had a lovely decorator around for a few days recently - he was friendly, kind, apologetic when he was a bit late, clearly devoted to his family (he'd had to cancel one day as he needed to bring his FIL to hospital), listened to what I said. I was so so nice to have a positive interaction with a man that was businesslike and respectful. And he did a great job.

I guess it's what people do in the face of bad things that are not within our control -
"if I did X Y or Z I'll be fine". Except it becomes "bad things happen because you didn't do X Y or Z and it's all your own fault."

I'm sorry MEOD and balls . That thread is absolutely horrifying.

I'd rather talk to people who are able to question their preconceptions...

Yep, I have dealt with a life-time of nutty parents, both of whom have personality disorders, and are completely unable to question themselves in that manner. I gave up that battle with them as a bad job a few years ago. I am so, so, so much happier for it . Growing up, they 'trained' me to think that it was my job to ensure they were on the right path, and I have only realised many, many decades that that its not my purpose in life.

MEOD

I think a lot of women have absorbed all the messages that if you do (or don't do) X, you won't ever be raped. Which is bullshit. You may as well wear a rabbit's foot and cross your fingers.

I sometimes feel like that at 9am after sending DC to school ...

Yep LordC, haven't quite reached the desperation where I am necking wine at 9am... yet. Will let you know when/if I get there

Zazzles (And was slightly at necking wine at 9 in the morning until I remember where you are .)

As John Stuart Mill pointed out over 100 years ago - all this discrimination only serve to keep the incompetent in and the competent out. But it seems that nobody will see this. They bleat on about positive discrimination and all that bollocks the nanosecond you say half a word about equality. Bastards and fools. I hate them all. (Did I say that before?)

I have fucking had it with the men I work with today. Fuck me, such an incompetent group of men I wish I had never encountered . My male manager sits on his arse all week, while I run around like a blue-arsed fly, figuring out the strategy and doing the organisation part of his job, as well as my job. Fuck me, I am not sure I want to work for him or this company in the future... I am now at home, necking wine.

I am glad I haven't seen that Ched Evans thread in AIBU. I do find AIBU a real varying mix of opinions, not all of which would jive with a feminist ethic. I have had my fill of trying to convince people who don't want to have their opinion changed - this is an un-winnable war, and one I will no longer engage in. These days I am far more interested in seeking out those who are willing to see an alternative - they are the ones who are worth my time.

That thread sounds awful

On a less significant note, John Humphries got my back up on R4 this morning. He had a piece with a woman involved in making a tapestry being done to commemorate 800 years since the signing of the Magna Carter. He asked how many people were involved in it and she said there were 8 women. His response was immediately to shriek "no men? Why are men being excluded? Isn't that discrimination?" She said no men had volunteered. Then after allowing her a little time to talk about her actual point, she was explaining that they don't work from pre-drawn plans but sew freehand but often had to unpick hours of work. Humphreys said "Ahah! Now I understand why some people are better at it that others, but I'd better not say anything or I'll be accused of sexism"

Could you imagine a similar conversation about 8 men working on any project? I've started to notice more and more things he says that get my back up.

Oh Balls, that's terrible. So sorry to hear that.

I have just come across a poem I really like. It's called, "What's That Smell in the kitchen" by Marge Piercy.

It starts

All over America women are burning dinners.

And ends

Burning dinner is not incompetence but war.

So - all of us that have experienced 'men folk' who can't do cleaning/cooking properly - women are just as able to do the same. I may need to start posting the first and last line on any of those 'menz don't see dirt like women do' type threads.

In other news - my gp saw the blood results about my thyroid and has made me an urgent appointment for this Weds. Glad it's being addressed, but obviously worried about what exactly is going on.

:(

My best mate was applying for CICA compensation for her date rape just before she killed herself. I'm glad I didn't go on the thread.