Woman receives rape threats after recording sexual harassment walking New York streets

In response to mengog's point, it can be a fine line, depending on the context. Striking up a conversation in a pub or club, or even at a bus stop can be acceptable if you are able to read body language and responses. If a woman - or a man - makes it plain that they are not interested, then you have to be empathetic enough to know when to shut up and go away. Otherwise it is arse-holery of the highest order.

Heading down a street is more questionable. When she was your partner, did you ever discuss your behaviour? Did she find your approach intrusive? Would she have approached you in the same way, as she obviously found something about you attractive? If not, why not?

One thing I have noticed when I walk down the street, is how many men are looking me in the eye, vs how many women are. Women walk down the street trying not to catch the eyes of others, because they don't know where it will lead to. Men are hoping that the eye contact with women will go somewhere.

Sorry about typos. Bloody phone. ...

The question I would all women who defends the men as being boring more than friendly is "how many men did toy say hello to in the street today? " there is a good chance it is none and had always been none. Women just don't do this because we know that it is rude and intrusive. That woman had no other women day Hello to her, just men. Womenare friendly too aren't they. Those men were not being friendly. They were trying to get in her pants. ... or cause her distress.

She's an actress, the video was the idea of a man, who runs an advertising agency, I believe.
I wonder how many rape threats he's had.

Did you do what that creepy guy in the video did? Walk alongside her for 5 minutes while she gave you this look ? Tell us about your pick up tactics - which ones in the video did you use? Are you creepy? Sleazy? Mr Friendly? PUA? Mr What-time-is-it? Offer to take her out to lunch/dinner/a hotel? What's your MO?

It's not a fine line at all. You approached and spoke to that woman because you felt entitled to. That woman didn't ask you to, didn't approach you, yet you thought it was OK to speak to her. The fact she didn't mind is not testament that it is OK to do this sometimes, it's just that you were fortunate. Or maybe there was body language to suggest your approach would be welcome which is a very different scenario from the ones we are speaking of. Of course, she may have recognised you from walking to work. Again different scenario.

But you still didn't have to go and speak to her. Yet you did. Because you wanted to. Men approaching strange women in the street is all about what they want.

And generally strangers do not say hello to each other when walking past each other on a street. Unless you are like the only people around or out on a country walk or something similar. Context, as before, being everything.

It's a fine line. I met an ex by just approaching her in the street. I had seen her walking to work a few times and thought she was stunning, so I went for it.

I think shouting abuse or sexual comments is different. I can even see how an hello could be seen as intimidating, but you will never stop people saying it to others in the street.

scallops Absolutely, couldn't be any clearer could it?

I don't think this has backfired on her. I think it's proved her point, in a horrible scary way. The point being is that men approaching women unsolicited isn't as innocent or as unharmful as these commenters would have you believe. Because as soon as you challenge the status quo and up the ante look what happens.

Compliments? Friendly? My arse! Male entitlement and privilege in all its glory.

"I think any woman sticking her head above the parapet is screwed now"

Yes puffin

You could say that now for most women who want to do this kind of consciousness-raising activity, they're basically in a position of "so what am I going to do this time that is put me on the receiving end of rape and death threats?". The answer is that it takes so very little, it's basically a given of being a woman with a moderate internet presence (if that)

Caitlin Moran put it very well : "i have one rule of thumb that allows me to judge...whether some sexist bullshit is afoot...are the men doing it? Are the men worrying about this as well? Is this taking up the men's time?" Well, men aren't being constantly cat called and commented on. Men aren't worried about it. It isn't taking up men's time. Ergo, it is sexist bullshit!

I agree, Scarlett. Cause they're not just saying hello, are they - they are pleading innocent friendliness when it is nothing of the sort. A good question to ask is 'do you behave the same way towards men? If the answer is no, then your behaviour is probably sexist.'

Yes, it's so hard to find the words isn't it. Instead of just screaming and screaming until you are sick

I just don't have the words it makes me so, so angry. And if you retaliate they get more shitty, stay silent you get "not talking, too good for me" etc etc
It's like "STFU and leave me be"

Imagine our surprise !

DH has watched the video and can't believe men can behave this way - he thinks it clearly is harassment, not to mention some pretty pathetic attempts to chat women up using the Joey Tribiani school of charm ('how you doin'?)

I think any woman sticking her head above the parapet is screwed now. I don't think this has backfired on her anymore than her standing on a stage and telling the story. Men (as a class) don't want to hear that they are harming women by their thoughtless actions. It makes them look less than the heroes they believe themselves to be, so they hit out.

Depressingly predictable, you can't get through to idiots like that, all they see is women as objects and despise them for daring to ask to be treated as people.

David Futrelle has a blog post about some of the reactions. There are some sincerely fucked up men in the world.

My mil told me that most of the men were just being nice and people get upset about things too much these days.
i got a little mouthy about a woman's right to walk down the street without a single comment. Men can...
my husband had to change the subject as it upset me. She also thought that all theseaallegations of inappropriate behaviour by radio djs was just something that happened back then. No need to get so upset about it.
I think was her birthday and i kinda got v upset at her. Oh dear. When will i learn?
she isn't even very old. It's like the feminism of the 70 s past her by...

off-topic, but "lewd" is such a grim word