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Original poster

I have had a row with my boyfriend about this

87 replies

smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 18:48

He thinks it's funny.

I can't formulate an argument beyond "it's vile and horrid and not nice at all"

What do you all think?

www.rdfoodproduce.co.uk/400377721

You need to read the bit about "The Girls" Angry

OP posts:
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temporaryusername · 26/10/2014 18:39

You know that site, even if it is fake, reminded me of two places I used to work.

One had the same kind of 'just joking' thing going on, but actually was deeply sexist. Some of things that were said I can't repeat. They would out me for one thing because I've complained a lot about them. It was horrendous. I wish I'd been on MN then.

The other was actually a nice female dominated workplace, but there was one man who worked there about a day a week who referred to all the female employees collectively as 'the secretaries'. He didn't even do that as a joke, he just thought that was how it was.

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 26/10/2014 18:21

None of the other things were big things - they just felt a bit "off".

FWIW he hasn't contacted me.

OP posts:
Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 26/10/2014 18:07

AskBasil - I think you're right.

I have shown three other male friends the site. Not one has reacted like he did. One way or another it shows that he didn't really know or understand me at all.

OP posts:
AskBasil · 26/10/2014 18:04

Sometimes it takes something like this, to crystalise what you already feel uneasy about but seems too trivial to end a relationship over.

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 26/10/2014 07:48

It's funny, since that the other night, I've been thinking about other small things that were sexist that he did, but not massive, just small and I'm cross with myself that I didn't call him on them at the time.

Stuff he said, and even after I'd said clearly "I don't like that please don't say it again" he kept doing it and making out it was a joke and funny - he clearly didn't respect my opinion that it wasn't.

OP posts:
Zazzles007 · 25/10/2014 21:18

Good for you Smashbox. He may not have valued you, but you are showing you value yourself highly by kicking his arse to the kerb. More women should be doing this with men who are not respectful of women.

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 25/10/2014 18:15

I've blocked his number and blocked him on facebook. He could still email me. But he hasn't.

I am no way going to be around someone who disrespects me and doesn't value me as an equal - and by what he did I know he doesn't see women as equals. And that being the case, I have absolutely no interest in him.

OP posts:
AskBasil · 25/10/2014 18:12

Good for you. I'd remove his number and move on.

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 25/10/2014 18:08

I have no interest in seeing him. None at all. Don't even want to find out why he hasn't replied.

And yes, if he thinks shit like that is funny, then that's what he thinks of women and he's not fit to lick my boots.

OP posts:
AskBasil · 25/10/2014 18:04

Smashbox why do you think he hasn't replied?

Do you want to carry on seeing him?

One of the regular bits of advice is "when a man tells you who he is, believe him"

He's told you who he is. A man who doesn't value women and ultimately will never really value you.

uglyswan · 25/10/2014 17:39

OP, your "I am a feminist, actually" badge is in the post.

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 25/10/2014 08:29

I sent him a version of Zazzles post last night. I know he has read it. He hasn't replied.

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messyisthenewtidy · 25/10/2014 07:11

It's this kind of crap that made me a feminist in the first place. Everything masquerading behind a joke. Women infantilized and defined by the way men see us which is nameless and there for sex.

No one seeing it as a problem cos it's small fry, gaslighting you into thinking you're the one with the problem.

Thank God for FWR.

HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 24/10/2014 21:57

have you ditched your boyfriend yet ?

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 21:55

not if thats illegal he wouldn't

OP posts:
BuckskinnedAstronaut · 24/10/2014 21:54

I don't know... maybe he did hack into the admin account (or do something else clever)...

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 21:48

ah ok I shall tell my tech head he got it wrong ;)

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BuckskinnedAstronaut · 24/10/2014 21:42

What?

The (relevant bit of) page source is

Robert - The Boss Everything he says is to be obeyed he is always right :-) Bernard Crosby - The best Salesman and buyer in England ... why we hired him. Guy Taylor - Marketing and Purchasing Strategist. Headhunted in 2014. Full Time with
us now. Darren Brown - Accounts Manager - Whilst he is part of the OAM Group he has however been a part of our business since it started and his advice has been invaluable to myself in particular, an 'honourary' RD member. Paul Lelene of Offshore
Asset Management - Keeps our bank and the tax man happy. The Girls - They flounce about occasionally typing but usually just gossiping, hired purely to ogle at and grope when we get chance... joking they are the life and soul of the company.

You wouldn't see a history of edits on anything unless it were some kind of wiki (or unless you'd hacked into the administrator account, I suppose).

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 20:57

And I am led to believe

"the other elements on the page, about robert, bernard etc are in plaintext, open paragrahs, the comment about the girls - looking at the source, has a security token lock on it - obscuring whats in there, its history of edits and more - both the password and the justification for it thus locked, unlike its peers."

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Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 20:48

I just looked up the website address I have the name and address of the registrationant

OP posts:
HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 24/10/2014 20:20

OP, you described yourself as "not really a feminist"

I beg to differ Smile

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 20:17

Thank you all for not belittling me and my ignorance of feminism (aka my lack of big words and proper ways to explain my feelings!)

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mummyofonesofar · 24/10/2014 20:15

That's good then - everyone can snoop and see how disgusting and bad their page is. Even if it is real, who would buy from that company (or which women would let their men buy from here)!

Original poster
smashboxmashbox · 24/10/2014 20:15

Thank you Zazzles - I will reflect on what you have said.

OP posts:
HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 24/10/2014 20:14

...in other words, don't waste any more time on this prick Halloween Grin