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Original poster

How do you become a campaigner/ activist for survivors of sexual abuse?

32 replies

whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 16:52

I have no idea how to do this. I would really like to as I am unable to prosecute the person who abused me, feel totally powerless, and would like to find a way to put my negative experiences into positive action. Where do I start?

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Scarletohello · 18/10/2014 13:18

Women against Rape is an organisation that does a lot of campaigning work.

Here's a link

www.womenagainstrape.net

turbonerd · 18/10/2014 11:02

If you are up around Merseyside theyhave a women's centre and also Rasa that needs help from volunteers and with fundraising.

PuffinsAreFicticious · 17/10/2014 23:18

Eaves is good, the woman who runs it is amazing.

FreudiansSlipper · 17/10/2014 23:13

no not snippy at all

Eaves is a great organisation to look at that supports women.

some organisations have open facebook pages where people can share their experience and speak out about their experiences and is a way of speaking out to others

getting into an organisation at times is hard they are guarded so all I can say is best to get your cv out offering support in campaigning and work from there

MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 21:40

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 21:17

empire how is your trial going? I know how brave you need to be to go to court, so respect is due to you.

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Panthingies · 17/10/2014 20:35

in fact I've just googled Womens Aid, and it automatically came up with the contact details of our local centre.

Panthingies · 17/10/2014 20:32

Try the local Womens Aid. It isn't an org, with national coverage BUT with hundreds of centres there's likely to be one within striking distance. Our local is v active (even Tesco allow fund-raising events in store!) but again funding is a blight for most vol/independent orgs and that funding is often on the 'residual' spending plans of large organisations (usually local authorities). They're still worth a visit in your efforts.

MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 20:25

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MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 20:23

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PetulaGordino · 17/10/2014 20:02

OP have you been able to let them know which parts of your support they could have improved on? if not, and you felt able to, that in itself is a form of activism. i would hope that they would be receptive to this

Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 19:56

I'm not trying to put them down, they were fine otherwise.

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 19:55

Rape crisis (eventually, they kept neglecting to call me back when they says they would and unfortunately gave me some inaccurate information about reporting anonymously) arranged a meeting with me and the police to discuss reporting "in theory". But I was too scared to give his name, even though the police pressed me to.

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MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 19:51

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 19:48

When I called Victim Support and tried to explain that I was scared that my abuser would have me harmed/ killed if I reported him, they acted, quite literally, as if they had never heard if such an issue and had no idea what to say to me. Who do you talk to about that? No one I guess, that's how people like me are kept silenced.

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 19:39

Yes victim support definitely needs improving. I also feel strongly about educating people about the real definition of consent. You only need to look at what's been said on TV this week to see how rape/ abuse is categorised in terms of degrees physical force used. That kept me down for such a long time.

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Panthingies · 17/10/2014 19:29

sorry it was Empires shite service that was received.

Panthingies · 17/10/2014 19:28

no snippyness apparent, OP.

Panthingies · 17/10/2014 19:26

yes Victim Support, I'm afraid it's still a shoe-string operation, and often relies on 'volunteers' themselves. Having said that, I'd hope and doubt that these days the shite response you got then would be replicated - I had responsibilities in courts a few years ago and the VS people were committed and entirely female. The fact that the legal system we operate in is an adversarial one means victims are some way down the arrangement of priorities.
I'd think you are going to have to be patient, resilient and fairly dogged, OP, until you find a niche re what you want to actually do. But.. NSPCC, a local womens refuge ( some funded independently) , Rape Crisis, Womens Aid would be reasonable places to start.

MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 19:19

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MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 19:19

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 19:15

I didn't mean to sound snippy there btw. I'm just really, really tired tonight and it was actually my counsellor that suggested me doing all this in the first place.

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PetulaGordino · 17/10/2014 19:09

improved victim support sounds like a good focus for campaign activities

MyEmpireOfDirt · 17/10/2014 19:04

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Original poster
whitetigerlily · 17/10/2014 18:52

Thanks.

Just to be clear, I am asking about being a campaigner, not a counsellor. I know that you have to have worked through your own feelings to do any kind of counselling (which I have anyway to a large extent). I used to work in mental health with people from all kinds of abusive backgrounds, and no offence, to be honest I think that's fairly obvious even if I hadn't.

I want to speak out about what has happened to me. I wish there had been anyone over the years that I could have related to speaking about the vulnerability to abuse girls from neglectful backgrounds often have for example. I spent nearly 3 decades of my life drowning in abject self loathing and I don't want such a large part of my life to have been wasted, now that I have understood that what happened wasn't my fault. I think about all those girls in Rotheram (and of course everywhere else this goes on) for instance, who were convinced that their abusers were their "boyfriends", like I did, and yet we still perpetuate this image of rape as something that happens at knifepoint with strangers.

I guess I just want to use my experience into something useful or positive.

I have also found that there is no support, including, ironically, from Victim Support, for people like me who are terrified of reporting their abusers. The police told me repeatedly to give them his name but admitted they would do nothing to try and protect me.

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