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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

primary school - gender stereotyping

135 replies

pinguina · 06/10/2014 10:39

Hello
I live in the Midlands with DH and 2DD aged 4 and 6. On Friday I received the school newsletter with this info: in order to improve their writing by giving them topics they are interested in, the children in my eldest DD's class have been split into groups, boys and girls. (I quote verbatim): boys' activities include climbing ropes, bending it like Beckham and making paper planes. Girls have been learning how to give a hand massage, how to make an entrance and strike a pose.This afternoon they will be getting together to put on a fashion show.
Is it 1954 and I hadn't noticed? I went to complain to the headteacher. What would you do?

OP posts:
edamsavestheday · 12/10/2014 13:47

Aebj - but why would a lesson on the anatomy of the hand be restricted to girls?

Greyhound · 12/10/2014 12:11

Shocking - fashion shows and posing? Jeez.

sashh · 12/10/2014 10:19

Update: spoke to the teacher. She apologised

I would have been sorely tempted to ask if she had a vagina and if so insist on speaking to the 'real' teacher as she can't possibly be qualified to teach, her dear little head wouldn't cope with a degree.

Actually I would be tempted to shake her - probably good I'm not a parent

PetulaGordino · 12/10/2014 07:45

Also the children are six. They're not in a position to turn anything to their advantage

Vivacia · 12/10/2014 06:26

But Aebj the OP isn't the teacher, she won't be there in order to turn things to her advantage, will she.

Besides, you're missing the point by a country mile.

Aebj · 12/10/2014 06:17

Turn it around slightly. Hand massage = what muscles are being used, how are they attached to the bones. How does the blood flow around these areas before and after a massage. I would turn it into a human biology project.
How to make an entrance. Appearance how do you feel when someone walks into a room. If a teacher walks in wearing a wedding dress to teach what and how would you feel. How do they feel people should dress to make entrance.
Strike a pose. Again another human biology lesson. What muscles are used.? what happens if we stay in that pose to long?
Climbing ropes, What are the ropes made off and how? what knots are used
Bend it like Beckham. Lets see if we can make a better film!!
paper planes. How is paper made? what shapes and designs work better? does weight help?

Would I complain no, not really but I would turn things to my advantage!

Vivacia · 12/10/2014 06:02

Have a look at the ABC Does blog - he advocates that boys will write if they have something exciting to write about.

SconeRhymesWithGone · 11/10/2014 22:37

I have the same question as nooka? How is this related to writing?

I do try to pick my battles these days, but I would be bouncing off the walls at this. Well done pinguina.

afussyphase · 11/10/2014 21:09

So glad you said something!
I've just read the Let Toys be Toys page on schools but there isn't much practical guidance. Does anyone know if there is any out there, perhaps with evidence about girls' and boys' ideas of themselves and their peers (eg 'girls can't do maths' or whatever) at the start and end of primary? Or guidance about how to combat stereotypes?
I think we really need to be much more challenging about stereotypes in primary schools. DD's school has boys and girls lining up separately (and I suspect that boys go in first; I know they always did in Y1 Shock). In her current class, the certificates they get for behaviour have a princess (girls) or spongebob (boys). Girls are apparently different in the after-school football club (if it's hot, girls don't play, which DD is apparently fine with because she is not particularly keen on football). I too want her to think she can be anything. She likes maths and science and chess and is amazing at climbing ropes. She likes Frozen and Elsa too. I don't want her thinking she should like rainbow fairies and princesses more than whatever she genuinely likes.
Maybe we need a new MN campaign again sexism in primary schools ...

Vivacia · 11/10/2014 16:57

Update?

edamsavestheday · 08/10/2014 12:25

hurrah, well done pinguina - you've just saved a whole class full of kids from being indoctrinated with misogyny (girls and boys). A good day's work indeed!

Let us know what happens on Friday...

Alsoflamingo · 07/10/2014 14:50

Long to hear how you get on on Friday, Pinguina. Honestly just ASTONISHED (and horrified) by this. Hope they realise why you were complaining and that it is a v. serious issue. Well done you.

TessOfTheFurbyvilles · 07/10/2014 14:12

I got to 'how to make an entrance and strike a post' and lost the fucking will to live.

I'm so glad you challenged it pinguina and lets hope the teacher has truly taken it on board.

MadeInChorley · 07/10/2014 13:43

Good grief!

I'd complain! I had to take a similar line with DS1's (supposedly progressive) nursery, which one week published a forward plan that divided the children along gender lines so the girl's could play "Dressing up as Disney Princesses and will enjoy curtsying and graceful dancing" and the boys were to learn all about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. DS came home telling me all about how cool it was fighting with swords and nunchucks ShockShock

starlight1234 · 07/10/2014 13:34

WEll hopefully she has taken it on board and shall wait to see what comes out Friday.

trevortrevorslattery · 07/10/2014 13:29

well done pinguina Smile

JubJubBirds · 07/10/2014 12:06

Well done you, a good job done! I'll check back on Friday for the update Smile

LurcioAgain · 07/10/2014 12:03

Hooray - well done pinguina.

Now to wait and see if they do anything.

PetulaGordino · 07/10/2014 11:49

sorry FOF i got all tetchy at the idea that i might enjoy prancing about in front of the camera Grin

pinguina you are fabulous, hope they review it properly

ErrolTheDragon · 07/10/2014 11:32

Well done! Smile Let's hope she comes up with something more appropriate on second thoughts.

pinguina · 07/10/2014 11:24

Update: spoke to the teacher. She apologised Grin... without much of a satisfactory explanation. So off I went - again - trying not to shout, explaining as calmly as poss why and how and to what extent it was wrong. Spoke about Mad Men and Emma Watson and let toys be toys. And mentioned my DD would love to learn how to do a cartwheel or rope jump etc. and that if she decides to become a manicurist, then let her be. When she is 20. But that now I want and expect her to think and dream she can be anything at all: astronaut, PM, doctor, hairdresser. Whatever.
She said they'll review the whole thing and I'll be waiting for Friday afternoon holding my breath.
THANK YOU all for your amazing support

OP posts:
FuckOffFerret · 07/10/2014 09:50

Sorry I wasn't implying that you did, I was just agreeing that those kind of tasks aren't great because they make some children (of all genitalia) want to crawl under a rock and never come out. I think teachers whould be aware of that. Theatre, that sort of thing is fine if you give everyone a chance to do it in a way they feel comfortable- posing is always about looks and there are certain kids who will never feel comfortable doing that.

LemonDrizzleTwunt · 07/10/2014 08:51

Will they let me attend? I am certainly able to attribute all my life's woes to not having been taught how to strike a pose and make an entrance. Perhaps my husband would have married me sooner, or I would have a better job, or be more liked and adored if I had.

Hmm BULLSHIT.

nooka · 07/10/2014 06:03

How do any of these things help with writing in any case? Are they supposed to be writing about making an entrance and striking a pose? Surely a fashion show is just a total waste of time even regardless of its total shiteness?

VashtaNerada · 07/10/2014 05:41

Link to Let Toys Be Toys resources mentioned upthread, I sent them to my school and asked them to take a look.