Minor male entitlements

I totally agree with you Lizard, I've encountered this behaviour from both sexes too!

I must live in a parallel universe, I can honestly say I have experienced all of the behaviour above from both sexes equally. In the bar / dentist one why not say 'I was first'. With the car thing if I'm with colleagues its mostly the most senior person of either sex that gets the front seat if I'm with friends it's who has the greatest need tallest / largest / health reason. I'm very petty with an armrest, I'll happily elbow the person on my one off even if I don't want it- the biggest battle I ever had was with a woman on a plane who had NO personal space boundaries.

To be fair I don't use public transport very often but I have noticed that in shopping centres women often use pushchairs as a sort of battering ram to barge me out of the way whereas men hold doors, let me go first into the lift etc when I am out with the pram. I'm sure we do stuff that's annoying too!!

Sure those people are rude and no, most of them won't be thinking "Aha! There's a woman sitting next to me, I must spread my legs as wide as I can!". They will just do it, because they believe they are entitled to it. But if you pay attention, then you will see that in vast majority of cases it's the man hogging the armrest or the woman stepping aside when there's not enough room to pass.

I have not really encountered these issues specifically relating to men. I think this behaviour is rude but could just as easily be done by women. I have certainly been interrupted by women at the post office counter and I'm sure my DH finds it hard to get a word in when my mum comes round! I used to go to the football every week with my DH, FIL and his uncle and nephew. I didn't even encounter this behaviour there and it was a very male environment - men would always let me get served at the bar if I was there first and include me in conversation. Don't get me wrong I can't stand sexist behaviour but I think these are examples of rudeness rather than sexism.

That is pretty tragic tbf. Indulging rude/stupid/ignorant behaviour begets more of the same. If we are all round at my mum's for such a meal, it's the kids who get first go at everything, and once four hungry teens have been at the food, there aint much left

Leaving mugs and biscuit wrappers on the tables for the long suffering clerk to governors to pick up.

The female governors tidy up their own.

Ah well, Curwen, sadly my Mum is a big fan of "growing boys need their food" despite all the men being over the age of 30 so when I'm visiting my parents I have to put up and shut up!

Callani, my mum or Mrs would tell me not to be such a greedy bastard and to put some back. What do they say when you challenge them, the ignorant bastards?

Oh my goodness - that bacon thing has totally enraged me.

That happens ALL THE TIME when I'm back home with extended family. There are 8 people sat at the table, and the 3 blokes seem to think that they get 60% of the food between them (and at least 75% of the protein).

Now I may not have a massive appetite but who bloody says that men get to have twice as much bacon as me? It's not like they're out working in the fields all bloody day.

Reading my post back, it may read like I implied that all men are socially incompetent. What I meant to say was 'are all those who indulge in such behaviour so socially incompetent.....'

I don't use public transport, so I don't see this. Are men who travel with partners equally as guilty?

Well, thanks Citrus. Nice bit of misogyny there. Blame the busy female bar staff, rather than the pushy men....

Men aren't socially incompetent at all, Curwen. Which makes you wonder why they do it...

What do people do when they see their own male partner taking all the bacon or stretching out on public transport? Or do men only do it when alone? Or are men so socially incompetent always destined to be alone anyway?

When you're staying in a B&B, and they replenish the bacon in the warming pans at breakfast, the men immediately take 2 or 3 slices, though there was otherwise, clearly enough for one slice per person in the room.

Try being short as well as female, virtually impossible to get served at a bar! Why don't we queue at bars? Is it because they were traditionally male dominated spaces?

Good bar staff keep track of who is at the bar and may acknowledge Mr Pushy but continue with orders from those who were there first.

I do get the wide-legs on public transport a lot though, but most of them do clamp shut if I end up with my leg pressed against theirs. I have in the past rubbed my leg up and down on theirs until they move it, but given that would be hugely creepy if they did it to me I don't do it to 'just' thoughtless men. Haven't actually had a creep rub my leg purposefully in a few years though.

I did quite a lot of bar work when I was younger, and I really take umbrage at the idea that bar staff always try serve men first.

In a busy bar, all customers are vying to be served, and if a man has barged to the front, the bar person is not to know that. They are busy pouring drinks, and can't be expected to notice that someone who was waiting in the second row back from the bar has had someone push past them.

Please don't blame the bar staff for serving men first - blame the man who doesn't say, "oh, this person was here first".

"That's an interesting point, CrotchMaven. Maybe one of the gentlemen would like to make it?"

yes, arm rests. Whenever you get to the plane seat and a male neighbour has already hogged both the armrests, I simply spread my elbows as well. They look of confusion, even terror, on their faces is hilarious, it's like I suddenly grew another head. As of course as a woman, I should neatly fold myself and not cause them any inconvenience.

Walking towards a man in a passageway, where one person has to give way.

Yep, especially if the woman is younger or considered to not be of the same social standing. I lived in Japan (for a short time, a long time ago), and it was even worse. Not only were you to move aside for the men, allow them through a doorway first, you were also expected to hold the door open for them in a 'gentlemen first' reverse-sort-of-way that happens in the West. I used to delight in beating the men to the door, and going through it first, not holding the door for them, and watching the confusion or anger on their faces.

In discussions and debates between men and women, it is usually expected that the woman will capitulate to whatever line of reasoning that the man puts forward, no matter how ridiculous or irrational their thoughts are. And if she doesn't capitulate, then she is silly', or 'wrong' or 'irrational'. Yes, I am looking at the MRA/misogynistic types that frequent FWR . Just because a woman thinks differently about a topic to you does not mean she has to change her thoughts to align with yours. She is a completely free human being, who has a will of her own. She determines her thoughts, her actions, her values, her meaning to life. Stop thinking that a man has a right to tell a woman how to think and what to do.

I've had this happen twice in a week:

• Waiting in a queue, get to the front, in the middle of a conversation with the person at the desk and a man comes up and interrupts and starts asking questions. Person behind desk answers him and ignores me.

The first time it was waiting to be seated in a restaurant. I had a reservation and was discussing tables with the maitre d'. He barreled in and announced he had a reservation and she took him off to seat him. Second time was at a hotel check in. The thing is they don't even notice that they are doing it. The entitlement is so innate.

It being expected that men sit in the front passenger seat in the car and the woman gets in the back.

Tidying up after a dinner party/dinner with friends.

Dh is usually doing a task, women always leap up to help, the many men I know never, ever do.

What annoys me about all this stuff is that they all go on to claim that they are so fucking chivalrous when, in reality, they use the fact that they are bigger and scarier than you to push themselves forward all the time.