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Original poster

Just got on a train...

282 replies

Vivacia · 15/09/2014 14:44

...sat actions from a table of four men discussing paying for sex. I couldn't believe my ears at first, wasn't really listening and then it became clear.
Finished with, "the only time I paid for It is the day I got married".

OP posts:
SevenZarkSeven · 15/09/2014 20:17

Also the cleaning toilets analogy reveals that fact that particular poster, while trying to speak for punters, reveals that in their mind working as a prostitute is an undesirable, unpleasant job that most people would rather not do if there were other options available.

So, big fail all round there really.

Thistledew · 15/09/2014 20:12

Very telling analogy from buw "people don't clean toilets if they don't get paid".

Of course not. 'People' don't. 'Women' do.

I bet buw has someone to clean his toilets for him.

Original poster
Vivacia · 15/09/2014 20:10

I don't understand the toilet comment. I've cleaned toilets for a living, I was a chambermaid. I had a range of options. I didn't do it to fuel a drug habit or because my boyfriend threatened me with violence or because I'd been trafficked or tricked in to thinking I was going to be a nanny. I didn't do it because I'd been sexually abused from a young age. I didn't do it because the alternative was to thieve. I didn't do it because I didn't have a friend in the world or didn't speak English.

OP posts:
CaptChaos · 15/09/2014 20:08

Also, to strain the metaphor to breaking point, a toilet cleaner's union wouldn't be almost exclusively run, funded and managed by toilet manufacturers, toilet users, those who wish to exploit toilet cleaners, people who clean sinks. They also wouldn't be seen to be deliberate working against the toilet cleaners best interests.

Shallishanti · 15/09/2014 20:07

....actually I DO clean toilets without being paid. I do it because it needs doing. I don't enjoy it but it has to be done and there's no shame in it.
I really can't see what that has to do with sex at all.
Nor do I despise people who are paid for doing it, I'm grateful to them and hope they have decent pay and conditions altho they probably don't.

iklboo · 15/09/2014 20:05

There's usually not a huge (daily) risk of sexually transmitted diseases, rape, violence or murder when cleaning toilets.

BuffyBotRebooted · 15/09/2014 19:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChunkyPickle · 15/09/2014 19:57

Cleaning toilets isn't illegal.

These people are buying consent, as the women (or men) wouldn't choose to have sex with them, ie. it's coerced sex which in any other circumstance we would call rape which is illegal.

I can't buy the right to kill or maim you, I shouldn't be able to buy the right to violate you.

CaptChaos · 15/09/2014 19:53

Same old tropes. Same old lies. Same old everything. When will you punters ever come up with anything even remotely resembling a cogent argument? Except you can't really, because their isn't one that doesn't make you sound like vile and rapey.

buwegevove · 15/09/2014 19:47

"It is debatable if you think men can purchase a form of consent from women who wouldn't otherwise give it."

Do you think people who clean toilets for a living would do it if they weren't being paid?

btw sexworkers can be men or women.

PetulaGordino · 15/09/2014 18:54

i'm sorry you had to put up with that. it is intimidating. it is telling you exactly what they are prepared to do to women and what they think of them. it puts you in a position of discomfort whilst also making it very difficult for you to challenge them

Original poster
Vivacia · 15/09/2014 18:29

As I was boarding their train, and they were already sat, it took me a while to register what they were talking about. I checked and double-checked.

I do wonder what the others, already on the train, were thinking.

OP posts:
SevenZarkSeven · 15/09/2014 18:21

"maybe they were the type of men who enjoy trying to embarrass women"

Or upset them... This happens a lot actually doesn't it.

Vivacia they were way out of line. Even if they had been talking about consensual sex with their partners it's not appropriate conversation for a train FGS. Add in that they would know full well that their conversation would be likely to be upsetting / intimidating / offensieve / inappropriate to large tracts of the population and you have a different thing again.

I guess the question is, is sexual exploitation of women so standard now that men feel it is perfectly standard conversation in general public situations. Depressing.

Pepperwitheverything · 15/09/2014 18:01

How arrogant were they!! They should be ashamed to talk in public about women that way and the fact they aren't shows them to be deeply unpleasant little men who think this is normal!! Or maybe they were the type of men who enjoy trying to embarrass women. Yuk.

Original poster
Vivacia · 15/09/2014 15:20

I'm ok, I just felt the adrenaline pumping as I felt I had to say something. Then the moment / opportunity passed.

OP posts:
CaptChaos · 15/09/2014 15:17

Don't worry, Buw is an obvious punter, so has a vested interest in men using women as wank socks.

Really sorry you feel uncomfortable Viv, some men are just utter idiots.

Shallishanti · 15/09/2014 15:17

ah, xpost, looks like you did that

racist too eh, nice

Shallishanti · 15/09/2014 15:15

they are being rude to you, OP, and everyone else in the carriage by subjecting you to a conversation it is likely you will find offensive.
Just as it would be rude to discuss their bowel movements in public.
On top of that they are revealing themselves to be inadequate wankers.
Are you at an angle where an eloquently raised eyebrow might indicate all of that?

Original poster
Vivacia · 15/09/2014 15:12

I had that thought Belle and felt angry that I was put in a position on consider it. I was pointedly looking at them, the main one noticed and they changed their topic.

Buw, sex is not the same thing as exploiting "cheap Asian and Romanian" woman in Holland for blow jobs. They are apparently bused to the football fans' hotels and "know just why they are there".

I feel sorry for you that this is what sex is like for you.

OP posts:
BuffyBotRebooted · 15/09/2014 15:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

buwegevove · 15/09/2014 15:09

"They are talking about sexual exploitation."

That's debatable.

BelleOfTheBorstal · 15/09/2014 15:07

I can't actually believe they carried on the conversation, after you had sat down near them.
Are you in a reserved seat, or can you move away from them?

BuffyBotRebooted · 15/09/2014 15:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

buwegevove · 15/09/2014 14:58

"I wonder what the passengers sat behind us are thinking."

I'm sure they must be shocked and horrified hearing guys talk about sex and thinking what is the world coming to.

Original poster
Vivacia · 15/09/2014 14:55

Yeah, I'm sure his wife would love to be subject of a cheap joke.

I wonder what the passengers sat behind us are thinking.

OP posts: