Right you pesky feminists, which sort of rape is *worse* <Dawkins related>

I don't get how you would 'mildly' rape someone. Would it go something like 'Oh, I'm sorry, excuse me, my penis seems to have slipped into your vagina. Awful bad show, I know, can't think how that would have happened. BAD Dawkins BAD Dawkins. Gosh, I really am most mortified. What a pickle I've got myself into, ah? Please don't take this the wrong way. I don't understand how this could have happened. Golly, this is a bit rum, eh? Anyway, what's on telly?'

sorry, england and wales

under uk law kidnap is an aggravating factor

Whatever the circumstances, Monty, whether you've been tied up and thrust in a boot, or whether you were sleeping next to the person 5 minutes previously...when you have an unwanted hand/penis/object invading your vagina and you can do fuck all about it, there is NO "better or worse."

On reflection, I don't think it answers the question; my choice would really be based on attendant circumstances rather than the actual act of rape. For instance, I wouldn't want to be tied up in the boot of a car on my way to a forest; I'd be worried about what would happen. The aftermath. Horrible horrible...

But that's the kidnap element, it's the circumstances surrounding the act... so I'm not sure where that counts so far as this discussion goes. Would that element be counted within a conviction? Would it be an aggravating factor? Is that how it works - as JTRB suggests?

And he has loads of followers, plenty of whom will be men, many of whom will have seen 'date rape is not that bad' and seen it as an endorsement. I wonder how many people when they say date rape isn't as bad as stranger rape are really saying 'the kind of rape I do is not as bad as the kind of rape they do'

^^
Not an accusation
(already had one deletion today for being 'mean' about Nick Clegg.)

Ugh.

Never liked him anyway.

He did say one was worse. The awful thing about it is he was making a point about saying if one thing is worse than another, then to say so does not endorse the 'less worse' thing but because he's a massive tool he decided to throw in a few 'edgy' references to sexual assault, just for fun and not giving a shit how traumatising it is for the people who have been told that their rape wasn't that bad.

I was asleep, so definitely not asking for it, unless by virtue of being female and having a vagina.

And rape IS an act of violence. It may be aggravated by assault, but it is in itself violence.

He did say one was worse:
"Mild date rape is bad. Violent date rape is worse"
What exactly is "mild" rape?

I don't know. I was raped by someone I knew; it was a massive violation of trust, apart from anything else. It makes you not trust any men you know. Is that better than being raped by a stranger who fits the rapist box? I don't know and I hope I never find out. But given that rape is perpetrated by men, it is more than crass for a man in a position of some intellectual power to pronounce judgement on it.

But he wasn't saying one was worse. He chose bad examples, yes.

For Christ's sake - who knows what kind of depraved, agonizing things a "date rapist" might commit knowing they've got more chance of their defense of "it was consensual" holding up in court?

It's an impossible choice and IMO the reason we should treat all rape as equally abhorrent.

picklepest, yes, that's it. unless it's a total stranger, RD thinks the victim was somewhere near asking for it. :0

The Pillow story made me choke up. Dreadful.

But Catkisser, in the highly unlikely scenario that I had to make such a terrible choice, I would make a choice. I'm pretty clear about what I'd choose too. Sorry, is that the wrong answer?

Rape implies I guess for (some) men (I have no idea why) violence. Ergo it's only rape if a stranger on a dark alley and you were in dowdy clothes. Anything else is filed under some variation of 'asking for it'.

Makes so bloody mad and sad.

his comments show that he thinks that if you agree to go on a date with somebody you are a little bit attracted to them, at least, so therefore, he can't understand why it is so bad to be raped by somebody you perhaps potentially could have been attracted to. It just shows he's no comprehension of the horror whatsoever.

He doesn't understand CONSENT let alone bloody rape. His must be a very pretty brain where actual thinking tires it out...

Catkisser good post.

blimey. agree, which would he prefer?

i think a date rape is a personal betrayal on top of a rape.