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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

This post on 10 things about raising boys has given me The Rage

36 replies

foxinthebox · 13/07/2014 07:42

m.today.com/parents/10-things-i-wish-id-known-about-raising-boy-1D79911267

It appeared on my Facebook page and I am raging. I have both genders and these cultural stereotypes just make so angry.

Why do mothers enforce these boys run around more and get hurt rubbish?

OP posts:
EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 13/07/2014 10:14

I have experienced 4/10 of the boys list with my DS and 4/10 of the girls list too. Load of bollocks.

weatherall · 13/07/2014 10:07

I got this on fb too. Shared by 2 women who only have boys.

I wanted to scream 'they are not all like that- my dd ticks lots of those boxes too' but I restrained myself.

I have one of each and there are some stereotypical differences between them but I blame socialisation/ nursery/media/Disney etc for that, not innate ness.

ChunkyPickle · 13/07/2014 09:59

Well, in my case, for each young child I know both lists are about 50% accurate (and for what I remember of me as a kid - and I'm a woman)

Just munge them into one big child list, and it'll be as useful as it was before, but without the stereotyping.

MorrisZapp · 13/07/2014 08:52

My brother, sister and I were raised 'stereotype free' by our feminist parents.

Guess what, my sister and I love shoes, my brother loves driving.

Goblinchild · 13/07/2014 08:48

Exactly, generalisations are exactly that and little use in most cases. Grin

foxinthebox · 13/07/2014 08:47

My son painted his nails to be like his sisters. One friend pursed her lips and told me how she was 'more traditional' She is one of the main 'all boys are such truck playing monkeys aren't they?'.

My friends with the more macho sons and docile girls are constantly issuing reinforcing statements. I would be really interested to meet someone who has not and see their children. I suspect that I go the other way, though I make an effort to be fair. It does help that my eldest do is easily the most sporty and my other do us the more confident and thus had more visits to a&e.

OP posts:
punygod · 13/07/2014 08:46

Two boys, like chalk and cheese.

Goblinchild · 13/07/2014 08:45

BOYS

  1. There will be planes, trains and automobiles.
Yes
  1. Boys don’t stop moving.
My boy didn't
  1. Clothes shopping will be a piece of cake.
No, he has sensory issues and can't cope with patterns
  1. His fascination with his penis starts sooner than you think.
Not really
  1. Roughhousing is innate.
He enjoyed it
  1. You’ll probably make a trip to the emergency room.
Several
  1. Pee will be everywhere. Everywhere.
Never
  1. You’ll learn not to compare your son to girls.
Or other boys.
  1. The goofiness starts early.
Yes, but so did his sister
  1. Boys adore their moms. He still does.

GIRLS

  1. You'll buy her stuff she doesn't need.
I did with both of them
  1. She may be way girlier than you are.
Not really, neither of us is 'girly'
  1. Her desire to borrow your heels, jewels, handbags and more will start as soon as she can walk and talk (and grow from there).
DS was much keener on jewellery and shiny stuff than she was.
  1. Everything starts early.
Yes
  1. She'll strike a sexy pose.
No, still doesn't unless she's deliberately messing around.
  1. You'll relish the excuse to read "Black Beauty," "Nancy Drew" and Judy Blume again.
I read both of mine my favourite books, not including the three listed.
  1. She'll likely go through an "I'm only wearing dresses" phase.
Never did.
  1. She'll hoard ... everything.
No, that's DS
  1. You'll fight over her hair constantly.
No, she likes it clean and tidy.

Any list that includes a need for an infant girl to wear 'bottom covers' over her pants when she's playing in a dress is weirdly anal and twisted IMO.
Does anyone with a modicum of intelligence take these seriously, or just as a bit of fluff akin to the 'Which Game of Thrones/Disney princess/animal avatar are you? quizzes?

LegoClone · 13/07/2014 08:24

Here's the equivalent raising girls one:

m.today.com/parents/9-things-i-wish-id-known-about-raising-girl-1D79911270

for some more stereotypical twaddle to get upset about.

From that list I can confirm that I buy stuff they don't need; they like to borrow my handbags and shoes; they reached many developmental milestones "early"; I'm enjoying reading childhood favourites to them; my eldest is a horder. Both my DC are boys.

Batmansbuttocks · 13/07/2014 07:51

What about it? It represents my experience and I have both genders. I'd be more interested in the raising girls one. Not all boys or girls fit stereotypes like all situations.