Treating girls and boys differently at primary age

Well the girls wouldn't really want to play sport but it's nice to have somewhere to sit in the summer that's not the concrete floor in the playground.

It's the one thing about the school that pisses me off - otherwise it's great. The only grassy area was tiny and they're building the new sixth form on that so there's no green space anymore.

mr it could've changed since last year when DD tried to go on it but she hasn't ever seen a girl on there. It doesn't say anywhere that it's just boys, but if girls aren't allowed on then it must be.

There would be no room for everyone to play football perhaps but more room to play other things.

They could dedicate 1 pitch to football, alternating year groups as necessary and open the other pitch for alternative running round stuff.

fluffy I have just re-read your posts and am - its not that those areas are reserved for football, but they are reserved for boys only football?

Well the school is 2/3rds boys and 1/3rd girls do they are outnumbered which seems to make it worse. So many boys want to play football at lunch the year 9/10/11s go on one Astro and 7/8s on the other. If they only used one there would be no space for everyone who wants to play.its ridiculous.

Yes, I've found Germany to be more sexist in assumptions when it comes to adults but much less so for children, which is nice.

20+ years ago I was a pupil at a mediocre girls boarding school, which went bancrupt. We all had to find new schools, and one of my friends was taken to look around a boys' school which was open to girls in the sixth form. She rwported back that toilets and changing rooms were labelled 'Boys' and 'Non-boys' ... they were not trying to be sensive to those of indeterminate gender, obviously. Private schools appear to be a law unto themselves in some cases.

and they PAY for your niece to go there ????!?!?

It feels to me as though private schools are worth at treating boys and girls differently.

Certainaly at the prep school my niece attends

• there is a specific boys' uniform and girls' uniform (with I don't think any bits in common)

• girls play netball/hockey in winter and rounders in summer while boys play rugby/football in winter and cricket in summer

• even the after school clubs are mostly for one gender or another, in fairness this is not enforced by the school, but apparently all the parents "know" that for e.g. it is not the done thing to enrol your son in cookery

Whereas at my DC's state school (and all the local ones I know about) - there is a unisex uniform, the DC do the same sports and the after school clubs are genuinely mixed.

Velvet - I would have cried at Santa my DD would have handed her toy back and asked for a boys one. And then she would spend the next few days saying she wants to be a boy as she hates girl stuff and being a girl . Never underestimate the messages it gives out

This is really interesting - I live in rural southern Germany, where I would say social attitudes are more sexist (the football coach asks for Mamas to sort out who will bake what for the end of seadon party, and for some Papas to volunteer go set up the tables) but school has no uniform, girls football (outside school) is as popular as boys, and the girls and boys play football on the field or a game similar to stuck in the mud on the yard together, so certainly seem to take up equal space. Sport lessons are mixed ( though they have proper separate changing rooms).

I wonder if the fact football (which is central here too) is not seen as a sport belonging to one gender has something to do with it (German women are world champions). Sewing and knitting is still taught at school - to both genders with no distinction.

The primary staff are all female though, apart from the head (who covers 2 schools and is not based at ours) ... I don't know how typical our school is, as social attitudes are, as I say, more not less sexist than the UK.

I am becoming ever more thankful by the day that our school is strong on equal ops - I have never heard a reference to Boys & Girls. Uniform is unisex. One PE kit for all. Any grouping is by 'family group' within each class. As far as I know most outdoor play is used by all - basket ball hoops, traversing wall, jungle gym, bikes, scooters. Quiet zones for those children who want to just chill. 30% of girls wear trousers - more up the school in the older classes. Music for all DC and lots of boys in the choir. Huge gym club that is 50% boys. I have only ever heard a teacher or TA say x child likes books or y child loves playing on the bikes. I have never heard 'it's because they are a boy / girl.

Football is a big thing. Football is perceived by so many people as being very very important. At our school there is an annual trip for the boys to go to football camp abroad. Nothing for the girls.

Our school is generally not too sexist, with the exception of girls being allowed to wear skirts I guess.

However, Father Christmas came around with gifts to the classrooms last year. He split them into groups of girls and boys. The boy group was given cars and trucks, the girl group received cooking toys, aprons, and things for the home corner.

Yes, I was going to make the point that Romey made - the uniform choice available to girls totally reinforces the emphasis on their appearance.

Our primary school ran a programme for parents on Raising Boys which I went to. All the tips and techniques they taught us were equally applicable to boys and girls and they admitted that a lot of 'boy' behaviour is down to socialisation. They haven't run one on Raising Girls obviously

Just found this glaring error on our school's website: "We all packed our bags and waved good bye to our Mummy’s and Daddy’s at the door." Perhaps more to worry about than girls not being allowed to wear trousers

This thread is a depressing read. My oldest is only just two so not at school age yet, but our local school doesn't allow girls to wear trousers, only pinafore dresses or skirts.

The louder kids of either sex will always monopolise the playground (much in the way that louder people monopolise most public spaces in later life!!)

I don't get the whole "boys hate books" literacy thing either. Mind you, I was quite a bookish child, but it still baffles me how books have ended up somehow being perceived as 'girly'!

At my first primary school girls and boys played together loads and I don't remember anyone playing football. Later in the school a small part was set aside for football but the playground was large and there was room for everyone. At my second primary the playground was much smaller and monopolised by football games.

I think no more than half should be used for football.

Many primaries do the same in practice. If they say please play foot ball on the field or in that part of the yard, that area becomes 'boys only space'

Girls would never think of playing in the centre of the field, they are pushed to the margins.

DD2 says you had to teach the reception DCs how to wait to cross the field without getting squashed.

It's a very difficult problem, you cant ban the boys playing football, there Mother's wouldn't stand for it and their class teachers would hate it. They need to let off steam. The girls would hate it as grumpy boys would just take over the yard instead playing chase etc.

If you encorage the girls to play netball or something similar that pushes DCs of both sexes who want to play quiet imaginative games or small scale running about or skipping games into the corners.

It's incredible the guff that's still around in this day and age. I was told by a teacher recently that 'boys are not interested in reading and if they are, they certainly don't read fiction'. How is that helpful exactly?! And of course no boy has ever read Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings or any other work of fiction. I think we do boys a huge disservice by expecting them to fail at literacy

flufflydoge, that really does sound extraordinary, and completely unjustifiable! How the hell can you have a 'boys only' place for sport in this day and age?!!

Wow, reading this has given me food for thought for when I pick schools for DD1 next year. I hadn't given any thought to how a school might fail her for being a girl. Thanks!

School had a football club with an external coach, mixed in theory, but the boys dominated totally.

The girls only got a netball club because two mums did the course.

Far more merit certificates seemed to go to girls, but maths ones went to boys. Girls were fir english, reading and being belpful.

Ok the best mathematicians in DD2's class were boys, but rewarding effort as well as absolute achievement would have been nice.