Justifying long term SAHM to DDs?

Retropear, oh yes he would . Just over the phone/messenger/chat/any other system instead of face to face. And all of that is slower, and working in IT from home a faff unless you have a really good setup. I have a big ass screen at home, but at work I had four and the lag in the remote connection, although barely noticeable to "normal people" drives me batty.

They are trying to cram everything in to a 18 hour day,

Eighteen hour days are lunacy. They are a very long way from being the norm for British working adults and shouldn't be encouraged either - bloody unhealthy and a dreadful example for a parent to set a child.

I dont ever plan on returning to work but i do home educate my kids so i guess that is a little different.

I just think we should all encourage our kids to do what makes them happy,they wont automatically copy us when they leave home.I didnt assume i would meet a rich man who would pay for everything,it just happened,and actually i met dh before all that,he was earning peanuts when i first met him!

In an (my) ideal world my children would all find things to do that that they love that they can do from home so they can bring up a family and do something for themselves,but in reality they might do something completely different.

They don't have the time Fide. They not faffing about on stuff all day looking present, they're trying to get it done - with colleagues -who are also present. And a few are in other countries and cities 5 days a week.

Marsha that kind of life sounds like utter hell.

There is no way I'd ever in a million years want a job like that.You can keep it.

I'm talking about walking 3 yards from one's desk to one's kitchen to have lunch with one's DC Marsha not 'wasting time commuting twice'.

My dp works in IT and reckons he'd get more done at home as he wouldn't be pestered so much.

I worked from home once a week, a City job. It was great in terms of reducing my stress levels but I could never get as much done as I do in the office. There is nothing like face to face contact, discussing work over a coffee with colleagues, turning around and asking someone behind you a question. I'm in IT so I'm very aware of the technology. And yet, it is not the same. I had plenty of videoconferences with my team in NY and yet there was nothing like travelling over there in terms of getting shit done.

It would be impossible for the few people I know that work in particular posts in finance to duck home for lunch. I'll ask them why they don't, I think they'd laugh tbh

They are trying to cram everything in to a 18 hour day, there's no time to waste on commuting twice. If they are close enough, not in a meeting, or not travelling.

They are there because they physically have to be, not because they think it looks good.

I'm sure some jobs require FT physical presence but most don't. I'm talking about the essential requirements of the job BTW, not how they are currently designed.

Fide

I agree.My inlaws work for a high profile US company(they have skills few others have). Company desperately wanted to keep them but they wanted to come back from the US and work from home?They got the lot,full time at home for both,computer equipment,the works.Funny that.

My dsis managed to wangle a day working from home(again sort after skills).

Dp has broached the subject but got nowhere.

It can be done when companies are forced to.

Fideline great post!
hear! hear!

They are there because they physically have to be, not because they think it looks good.

I haven't bought it at all, I have opted out and work from home and earn whilst being around.

I know some people who just can't do that, they are travelling or they are in another city or they are in back to back meetings all day - thinking of friends in the city. It isn't possible.

I think you have completely drunk the koolaid of corporate presenteeism Marsha.

Marsha a great many jobs in the financial sector (for example) could be done from a home-office anywhere on the south coast (for example) with plenty of video-conferencing and the odd day in Canary Wharf (for example). A parent doing such a job might still need a nanny (for example ) but could also have the freedom to do things like have lunch with the DC, duck out to see the school nativity for half an hour and clawback some of the 15+ hours per week time they would otherwise have spent commuting to spend on the beach with the family (for example).

It's hardly a ludicrous idea. The technology exists. Where's the downside?

And then there's New York or wherever hasn't changed the culture and the UK doesn't look so attractive when it takes so much longer.

and they are willing to pay high amounts for it.

You could change the culture and slow everything down, but you can't stop some enterprising person realising what clients really want is fast, present service and be willing to pay for it.

It isn't 'their own game' though. It is, for banks and the city, the game.

Yes it is. Why do most banking jobs have to be carried out by people physically present in the square mile or canary wharf? No good reason at all. It is just cultural.

It isn't 'their own game' though. It is, for banks and the city, the game. How can you stop anyone's drive to beat the colleague next to them to the top. Male or female, it's not even gendered.

It's just that mothers tend to find the cost too high and opt out.

This

These days, my own view is that Mon-Fri office-based, city-centre, long commute, job roles are the manifestation of gendered work patterns; a template of working life that lingers from a time when men commuted to paid employment and women remained in suburban domesticity performing unpaid caring roles.

Every time we try to jump in and try to "beat them at their own game," we add legitimise the way society is presently organised. We further reinforce the assumption that traditional female caring responsibilities are demeaning and not high status.

Remember the Government, ultimately, has to serve the people. Otherwise there is revolt / they don't last long. Although I am talking long term here...

I agree unless you're saying those not in a position of power(the majority) aren't worth listening to.

TheWord It depends on the men (making the decisions).....

Certainly, as a woman, I make plenty of micro decisions. All those little decisions make the big ones a forgone conclusion IMO....