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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

wwyd? dds detention

82 replies

ilikeyourface · 24/02/2014 16:09

Today in school dd was in history, andc they were learing about how Women helped in the war. A boy in her class ( who she has known since primary and are actually prety good friends) sarted saying how women shouln't have been helping in the war, they should have been at home baking, and we could have won the war alot quicker if they have staying where they belonged. Dd chalanged this which turned into a argument with him about sexism (quite lightheartedly she says as like I said they are friends) before dd got angry and sqirted some water at him. She got a detention for this.
In dds school you can ring up and say that your child doesnt have to do the detention if you give a valid reason. Part of me says 'make her do the detention, she shouldnt have squirted the water and should be punished
However another part of me says she was standing up for herself and other women so I should ring up
They are 14 btw .... wwyd

OP posts:
MothratheMighty · 24/02/2014 17:10

He was taken to task, by an empowered 14 year old girl.
Even if he was just doing it to be aggravating and isn't a dyed-in-the-wool-sexist KinderKircheKüche male. At 14.
DD has had many a heated discussion on similar topics with her peers. Smile

ilikeyourface · 24/02/2014 17:09

Am quite embaressed now Blush
Re reading my op I realise I was over reacting
You lot have given me a kick up the bum and ive now come to my senses!

OP posts:
eightandthreequarters · 24/02/2014 17:07

Well, she does deserve the detention b/c she needs to learn to deal with sexist arseholes without resorting to physical retribution. However richly deserved.

However, it also sounds like the boy was inciting the water squirting. If he'd been spouting racist rubbish and winding up a black child, I reckon the boy would be doing detention, too.

Be sure you also give her lots of positive feedback for standing up to him, too!

But yes, detention it is. The only thing I'd challenge the school on is whether the boy needs some quality time in detention to start reading up on feminism.

ArtetasSwollenAnkle · 24/02/2014 17:06

The boy's comments won't hold water (lol). Next time, she should get him to expand on how exactly the farming, food production, artillery, ammunition and other manufacturing jobs would have got done, as the able-bodied men were all abroad getting their arses shot off. Who was going to carry out the work - cows?

It's usually best to gently cajole idiots and their opinions into explaining exactly what they mean. Give 'em enough rope...

takingthathometomomma · 24/02/2014 17:01

I'm convinced that this is a joke. Feminism/standing up for women does not = squirting water at someone. Of course she should have a detention. Did they have to work on a wet desk?

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/02/2014 16:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PedantMarina · 24/02/2014 16:57

Send her to detention wearing a green white and purple sash.

HTH

SirChenjin · 24/02/2014 16:48

If she was chaining herself to railings or threatening to throw herself underneath the Kings horse then you might have a valid argument Grin. As it is, she deserves her detention - tell her to use her superior intellect to challenge these stereotypes next time Smile

longtallsally2 · 24/02/2014 16:45

squirting water is not really a feminist issue though - I think that should be the MN quote of the week!

DaenerysTargaryensDragonBaby · 24/02/2014 16:44

Nice work OP. Wink

Your DD sounds great, btw,

But yeah, you can use this opportunity to teach her not to lose her temper.

longtallsally2 · 24/02/2014 16:44

Tell her that you are really proud of her for having the sense to argue her case, and not just to roll her eyes and let him get away with such sexist nonsense.

Then tell her that squirting water still earns you a detention.

(Would she read Mandela's Long Walk to Freedom? It discusses clearly when to move from non-violent argument to a more violent response, when faced with repression!)

RiverTam · 24/02/2014 16:40

I wish I could get away with squirting water at anyone who's spouting nonsense at me

Notify · 24/02/2014 16:38

A safe platform....

Notify · 24/02/2014 16:38

That sounds like an excellent lesson to me. A are platform for everyone to state and debate their views. To say the boy should be taken to task is ridiculous

AcrylicPlexiglass · 24/02/2014 16:33

He sounds v annoying, like my sons. Squirting him with water does sound like fun and richly deserved but I think you always have to be prepared to take the consequences when undertaking such action as teachers tend not to see the funny side for fear that the whole class will erupt into a massive water fight. I think she will survive the detention unscathed and maybe she can take a super soaker in on the last day of summer term and deluge him.

ilikeyourface · 24/02/2014 16:31

Im going to call dd down now and tell her ' allthough it is okay to voice your opinion , you xannot go around loosing your temper throughing water at people expecting no punishment , therefore I shall make you do the detention and I hope you learn'

I wouldnt have ever thought of that if I hadnt started this theread, mumsnet teaches you alot Wink

OP posts:
BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 24/02/2014 16:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bifauxnen · 24/02/2014 16:24

Would make her do the dt but would mention to staff that I don't expect her to have to put up with bigotry in the classroom.

FannyFifer · 24/02/2014 16:24

Thank goodness, you would have looked a bit silly phoning the school.
Glad you've seen sense OP. Grin

Floggingmolly · 24/02/2014 16:20

Do you really believe she's being punished for "standing up for herself and other women"? Come on Hmm

waltermittymissus · 24/02/2014 16:20

X-post :)

Lottiedoubtie · 24/02/2014 16:20

I concur with everyone else!

Give her a book to read on feminism when she gets home so she can be more eloquent next time.

waltermittymissus · 24/02/2014 16:19

This is nothing to do with feminism.

She's getting a detention for squirting water at someone and so she should!

ilikeyourface · 24/02/2014 16:19

Haha okay ill let the detention stand , I do think I was being a bit pfb when dd told me looking for an something to be a bit wound up with. Thankyou , im glad I have something like mumsnet so I can get a food veiw before I jump and do something! Thankyou all, im not usually this ridiculous, I promise!

OP posts:
MothratheMighty · 24/02/2014 16:18

It was the water that got her into trouble, not her feminist stance.
So she deserves the detention.