What would you do if a university student wanted to bring her newborn to class?

I was a child development major at my junior college. As it goes, most students were female, and a large percentage had small children. We had a strict no children allowed in class policy. Campus had a nursery, but it didn't have enough space to accommodate everyone.

I understood the policy, because in this case, if children were allowed, they easily may have outnumbered the students.

This scenario is different. One newborn is not disruptive, as long as she agrees to walk out if baby cries, especially for how short a time is left in term.

I often wish my college's policy had accommodated newborns. Many women had babies in the middle of term, and so often they came back to class heartbroken and stressed a week after giving birth as they weren't ready to leave their newborns yet. The only problem I could see would be that all of us nursery teachers and development experts would have gone mad fussing and cooing over the newborn. But we're all adults, we would have settled when it was time to focus on class.

What zzzzz said

Hope it works out for this mum either way OP, you sound fantastically supportive x

New borns are pretty silent and when it's breastfeeding it will be quiet too. There are so few lectures these days it seems fair to let it in and given the amount of noise your average 18 year old youth makes I would think the baby would be very silent by comparison, no talking to it's friends, giggling, messing around. However once it got to a few months old 6 may be? it might start to get impracticable.

I would be fine with it as a one off but not as a regular occurrence (especially if H&S would have something to say about it, you might land yourself in hot water!)

How many lectures are we talking about here?

I used to wheel my friend's baby around campus while she was in her lecture - lucky timetabling meant I didn't have anything scheduled at that particular time. Rest of the time the baby was with his dad.

I also took my newborn to a couple of lectures and to a dissertation meeting. It was the diefrtence between finishing my degree to provide a better life for my family or not. My supervisor wrote me an excellent reference complementing my ability to meet deadlines whilst taking care of a newborn.

I also took my DD to meetings with my postgrad supervisor when she was a bit older. She happily doodled pictures and we got on with it.

I'm grateful for the flexibility I was afforded and would encourage the OP to see how it goes.

My wonderful PhD supervisor allowed me to take my son with me to a few of our meetings. I know it is slightly different as we were the only two involved, but I have always been so grateful to her for being accommodating.

OP, it is wonderful that you are willing to try and help the student achieve her potential. I now teach undergrads and would have no problem if one of them needed to bring a baby in, providing the lecture/seminar could still go on as planned.

Babies were silent in the lesson the mums just stuck them on the boob, or left them in the car seat.

Oh god, probably. And in the library! I am twitching just thinking about it!

I really do think that there are ways to reduce the problems caused by a gap. Obviously, I am basing this on my own hugely stressful final year and completely non-silent baby but I don't think saying 'yes! bring all your babies to lectures!' is really the improvement it looks like, iykwim.

Maybe she just wants to get on with it and finish her degree without taking time out?

I've never been in a silent lecture either - people coughing, shifting in their seats, typing/writing, turning pages, asking questions.

You'd be fuming now then - last time I sat in on a lecture about half of them were writing notes on laptops!

I hear what you're saying - but there are pressures on everyone that stretch beyond maternity leave. I think it is much easier to take a break when your qualification is in the bag - gaps are very risky - there is the emotional side - and also the university might change the course structure so that you need to jump through complicated extra hoops to finish.

My lectures were silent. I remember getting insanely pissed off with typers, people taking jackets off, pencils, you name it

A newborn needs its mother as much as a mother needs to know her newborn is fine.

Maybe the question should be why does a mother of a newborn NEED to go to university? Why isn't a woman allowed time off to recuperate and heal from giving birth and get used to taking care of a tiny human without dealing with the pressure of university too?

I've taken a newborn to talks and presentations - they're virtually invisible if in a sling and asleep.

I would have been delighted to see a baby in any uni presentations I did, if I'd actually noticed them. Actually, maybe there was, I can't be sure there wasn't

Students sucking on bottles of water like a giant boob are far more off putting than an newborn sucking on a real one.

I would say it depends on the baby. No way could I have taken my high needs screamer for example. I gather most babies sleep a lot though.
I waited until ds started school last year, sometimes take him up to the library if I need to pick up books, with a prior 'no talking' warning.

Seriously - what kind of uni did you guys go to where 'movement fussing and noise' in a lecture is a noteworthy event....? Is the norm that everyone sits like statues for the entire time? A baby latching on makes less noise that a scratchy pencil or a folder opening. I think this is outrage in principle, rather than in response to actual or likely disruption.

holiday - Nurseries wont take newborns so that would be pointless.

As a student one or two lectures as a one off fine. All the time too distracting.

Especially to other students doing that important presentation. I would be really put off.

Even her feeding the baby will mean movement, fussing, noise etc.

The uni wud be better put to giving her extra funds for childcare.

Plus if h and s policy says no kids and you go against that policy would that not be an issue?

penelope thats crap re the cushion. my uni werent great to begin with but i had exams when heavily oreg and some were quite long exams. so they arranged for me to sit near a door and that someone was available to accompany me (to check no cheating i guess) if i needed the toilet.

i found 'the system' was inflexible but actually most individual lecturers etc were happy to try and help. i did end up taking some time off, the rules wouldnt allow me to have time off for having a baby... i had to get a medical note from.gp and then another note when i started back 8mths later. i graduated with a 2:1 and ds1 came to my graduation ceremony, again not technically allowed but aided by a friend who worked for the uni. :)

Know, not d'état e stupid phone!

Please say yes and let her. I'm begging you. Because, quite simply, we need to be more child friendly.

A newborn needs its mother as much as a mother needs to know her newborn is fine. She can bf in theatre and u d'état and that if her newborn cries and she can't sooth the baby by moving position (as in wind, moving them upright) then she needs to leave until the baby is sorted.

I would love to see this in practice much more.

Hats off to you all who've managed it! My own student days were hard enough without a baby attached.

On reflection, I do think both options (carrying on, with flexibility and being able to take a break and come back) should be available. I know that I couldn't have completed my degree to the best of my ability with a 3 month old, but now mine is nearly a year, I think I would be able to.

My father took my toddler sister to lectures, and he was the lecturer. It was an old-fashioned stepped lecture theatre and she sat on the stage next to my father playing dolls while all the students cooed. (Sorry, irrelevant).

I think, try it and see. Then if it is genuinely disruptive, distracting others, not working for her you have an honest re-think and chat. Good on you for not just saying 'No'.

I'd have no problem with allowing a student to attend a lecture with a newborn, though I'd also check if she'd prefer to have the lecture put up as a podcast on Moodle or recorded in some other way for her and offer the choice.

Small groups would be a prob, we have tutorials with 4-6 in and I can imagine even a teeny baby being quite distracting for other students. OTOH they only last 50mins and we run lots of them so a good accommodation if she has friends on campus would be to find a time when a friend can 'hold the baby' so to speak for 50mins whilst she attends a conveniently timed class (even allowing her to duck out if the baby gets distressed and needs her).

I do remember when I was an undergrad a fellow student became pregnant and the chair of the Exam Board wouldn;'t even allow her to take a cushion in to ease her backpain during long exams. That struck me as unbelievably petty.