Women delaying motherhood is worrying

No one is being hectored,it's a fact.fertility decrease with age.like other medical facts
Public health will run campaigns inc topic like fertility.also Diet,exercise campaigns
One could argue the purpose of public health is to disseminate info.up to individual what you do with it

re risks and my earlier post about finances and promotions - if it turns out htat over the next say 5 years we don't get expected promotions/pay rises etc, my weighing up of the risks would likely change. so the risk of my fertility declining will likely feel of more importance than the risk of finances being tight

it's what rational grown up people do

PS. We hope that you are not considering becoming a single mother in order to meet our request for you to hurry up and breed. Because then you will be responsible for all that's wrong in our society. And we hope that you are not considering having a child and returning to work, because then you will be responsible for all that's wrong in our society. And we hope that you are not considering becoming a stay-at-home-mother, because then you've wasted your education and have no value whatsoever in our eyes. And we hope that you are not considering remaining child free by choice, because then you will be responsible for all that's wrong in our society

Love it Buffy perfectly put!

Absolutely Funny My long term boyfriend split up with me when I was 29 - Thought that was it and I would never have children. Plus I started my periods at 10, my mum started her Menopause at 45. I was very aware as I am sure all women are that I had a very short window of opportunity - we really don't need telling over and over.

quite drinkfeckarsegirls - and i think it's unsurprising that women might want those things too in their twenties, and i don't think that's a selfish thing

i think there are very very few women who aren't aware that there might be implications re waiting to have children

In fairness prof Davies said “It’s not for me to tell women what to do"
Her advice is correct.fertility decrease chronological age,and birth risk rises
Women should be told this,to make informed choice,to have the knowledge

No that's not the case mooncup.the research is contemporaneous
Think about it,really and sensibly.public health research isnt drawn from 17c France

No that's not the case mooncup.the research is contemporaneous
Think about it,really and sensibly.public health research is drawn from 17c France

exactly joinyourplayfellows

it is not that women don't want the information. but we have to weigh it up against our own situation. as scottishmummy says 'Whilst there is a biological optimum,it's not necessarily at same time as stability,finance,etc'. most women understand the risks of motherhood later and i don't think they mind being (non-patronisingly, and not weekly ) told about them, and as Prof Davies is a medical professional she is going to be viewing the risks from that POV. but there are other risks that come with having children, which aren't necessarily healthcare related

it's women not being trusted to weigh up the different pressures and risks. we have to be reminded

The question should be: why men don't want to have kids in their twenties?

Because they want to have fun, lads trips, no responsibility. Generalising here as the article does about women.

Should all women look for a partner at least 10 years older so they are mature enough to want kids?

Apparently the 'fertility falls off a cliff post-35' theory is based on a study of women in 18th century France

First, I just didn't want to have children in my 20s. Personal choice, wasn't remotely ready/interested. Second, I didn't have enough money as wasn't far enough along in career until my 30s. Third, I didn't meet DH til I was 28. Suspect lots of other women would say the same, so what are we supposed to do about it other than get pregnant by someone unsuitable and go on benefits and risk losing chance of decent earnings through building career?

The medical profession are looking at populations and statistics, which is all very well.

The problem I have with these articles is that regular rotation of variations on this theme is not only tedious, but it feels like an attack on women. The only science articles I see being trotted out as 'news' (with not actual news content) on such a regular basis are about alcohol and they are definitely intended to scare / change behaviour. I therefore am inclined to conclude that these articles are not science, but are intended to change behaviour.

I have a few problems with that. The 'it takes two to make a baby' is an obvious one and mentioned upthread.

I despise the image of this hard nosed 'career woman' with pockets of cash rocking up at 42 demanding an 'IVF baby'. If they're interested in populations then why single out this stereotype that I'm not entirely convinced exists How about the stereotype of a man who won't grow up and wants to have kids 'at about 40' without considering that perhaps ought not to have married a woman his own age if those were his plans?

Finally I find these articles terribly patronising. As a woman with no children in her early 30s, I do understand the basic biology. The idea that it's not occurred to me that having kids in 5 years might not happen is ludicrous because it's trotted out on the front page of the right wing press at least quarterly.

Ha. Well said Buffy and join

I don't think that any woman disagrees with the medical fact that fertility declines as we get older and the later we leave it the more risks, less chance etc etc. I mean its shoved in our faces by media, friends, family, medical profession almost on a constant basis now.

'they're always looking for the perfect circumstances' - um who on earth are THEY? All of my friends in my 30's want to have kids and NONE of them currently have a partner or if they do have a partner the partner is currently unwilling.

Um - this is not actually looking for the perfect circumstances.

Its hard to make a baby if you don't actually meet any one to even have sex with more than once and it's irresponsible to 'accidentally' get pregnant with a partner who has categorically said no they don't want kids yet.

I totally get the fact that SOME people may want to delay for perfect circumstances but if you listen to all the comments out there you would be forgiven in assuming that this was FACT for every woman of a certain age.

Women know that their ovaries are shriveling by the minute. It's shoved in our face A LOT.

Funny I was just putting the other side out there, sorry didn't want it to sound critical of you :-) Just used your post as a jumping board to back up my argument. I wish I had met the right man earlier as I wanted loads of children. I've been blessed with 2 gorgeous girls, dd2 was conceived when I was 39! A 'geriatric' mum

"Maybe she should just say, 'fuck it, your choice', as you lie there in your hospital bed."

Well as long as she forgoes her generous salary and makes way for somebody else to do the work, then who gives a shit?

I LIKE it, Buffy :o

Very good indeed.

This discussion is a perfect example of how people can choose to put whatever slant they want on any information at all. OP, it's an interesting article, but unfortunately you are just going to get the same old 'patriarchy patriarchy patriarchy' bullshit peddled out. Pity.

Because if you choose to have a child at a later age, it is professionals like Professor Sally Davies who might have to sort out any complications you encounter. Maybe she should just say, 'fuck it, your choice', as you lie there in your hospital bed.

"If you are a woman in a relationship and you know you want a child, I would say get on with it"

The problem with this, apart from it being entirely addressed to you (which is arguably as it should be, you are the one who will carry any child so you get to make the final decision as to when you want to do that) is that it presumes that wanting a child should be your first and only priority.

It tells you that if you want children you need to put that above everything else in your life and do it regardless of the damage it does to your ability to be financially independent, your ability to contribute to the world through your work, your ability to live a life you find pleasant and enjoyable.

And it's not new information, it's just the same old crap packaged up in the same old way. Oh look, another woman who had her children "late" warning younger women not to do the same.

Until society wises up to the cost of housing and child care and devises flexible working for both sexes. The problem will remain.

Fucking student loans and paying back university fees are only going to make it far, far worse for my DDs.

Whilst there is a biological optimum,it's not necessarily at same time as stability,finance,etc
Like most folk,I chose when I was solvent,at good career stage.that was a choice
Pragmatically when I was a right career stage and solvent,but I was mindful of age and was aware of research