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Original poster

Why would you be proud to be married?

261 replies

Grennie · 03/11/2013 18:06

I am just trying to understand this from a feminist perspective. Why would a woman under patriarchy be proud to be married?

OP posts:
MiniTheMinx · 03/11/2013 18:41

I have never understood how being married is practical. I must be positively impractical. The legal aspects are positively terrifying. I'd quite like the party and the big day but nothing would compel me to sign the register and sign away my legal status as individual entity.

AnyFuckerReporting · 03/11/2013 18:32

I wouldn't say proud but I'm almost relieved (?) to be married now after having two children together before marriage and dealing with judginess and sly comments about it from people. [smallvillageemoticon]

BlueJess · 03/11/2013 18:30

I'm very proud that my DH and I have built and maintained a strong relationship and family over a long time and in the face of some tough times.

We are married but I'd be just as proud of the relationship if we weren't.

hoppinghare · 03/11/2013 18:25

I don't think I would say I am 'proud' to be married but I am happy to be married.

PeggyCarter · 03/11/2013 18:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Trills · 03/11/2013 18:23

I think some people seem to think that to say that you are not proud of it means that you are ashamed of it rather than existing in a middle ground where you can like it and be happy about it but not be actively proud as if it is an achievement.

SunshineSuperNova · 03/11/2013 18:20

YY to practical and legal reasons, and an excuse for a party. :)

Original poster
Grennie · 03/11/2013 18:19

I saw a few women on that other thread saying they were proud to be married. It wasn't only the OP. And I just thought it was strange.

Yes I guess they have bought into the idea that marriage is the pinnacle of ambition for every woman.

OP posts:
PacificDogwood · 03/11/2013 18:17

Because you've bought in to the whole 'marriage is the pinnacle of all ambition for any woman' Wink.

I am married for purely practical/legal reasons; it did make my mother very happy indeed Grin

SatinSandals · 03/11/2013 18:16

I think that you have been reading the thread about the woman who didn't like her husband referred to as partner! I think it is a very small minority.

SunshineSuperNova · 03/11/2013 18:14

I'm married but I don't see it as some kind of achievement. It's a public commitment to another person.

This is my second marriage. An old friend of mine is in a committed partnership and has been with her partner for nearly 20 years - over twice the length of both of my marriages (so far).

I think that someone who thinks it an achievement of sorts has either swallowed the whole 'princess' thing wholesale, or believes that non-married partnerships are somehow inferior.