The Feminist Pub is Open - Chat, Rant, or pull up a chair here!

I was pondering something earlier.

You know how back when there was one 'feminism topic' there was a big discussion about whether it should be a feminist topic or a feminism topic, ie posts about feminism (which could include 'feminism's shit') or posts from a feminist standpoint. MNHQ came firmly down on the side of the former.

However, now we have a whole bunch of feminism topics, couldn't just ONE of them be a feminist topic? Then those of us who are agreed about the basic tenets could have those more in-depth discussions we used to have before the goaders arrived (and which some of us have elsewhere these days).

Yes. Everything is ok if you consent [eye roll]

Asks for half of finest bitter, to wash away the unpleasant taste left by the goady f* on the porn thread - I think we know who I mean (the "I'm so cool, just encouraging people to push the boundaries of what's sexually ok one"). Just reported him/her/it ('it': since one of the comments refers to bestiality, I'm leaving my options open as to quite what species we're dealing with here) on the grounds of the sum total of posts adds up to being goady/trolling even if individual ones stay just within the letter of the law. Watch this space to see what if anything is done.

Yes it does wear you down. There was a thread here about a DP being an idiot, and there were a couple of posters who kept saying that it wasnt his fault as men's brains work differently to women's brains.

And people not seeing that things are not as simple as they look and simply holding on to "men and women are different, aren't they" and therefore round and round we go again ...

Thanks for clarifying the context LordCopper

I'm thinking of "normal" situations, where you talk to people (I'm reducing that because it's driving me mad) and people will say "oh my sons would never listen to a woman" (true eg), "oh it's amazing your son can sit still for 5 minutes" (true eg), "oh my DH is useless at that - he's a man" (true eg) and so on. Nothing is ever "serious" but everything adds up and you go mad and decide never ever to talk to anyone ever again ...

Again, I know that things are not as simple as they look. It just wears you down ...

My post about "collusion" is not about abuse - I'm thinking more of people appearing to be happy to propagate gender stereotype and therefore perpetuating inequality. Sorry if that came out wrong. I do realise that things are not always as simple as they look ...

I do think sometimes though women who express right wing views are jumped on too quickly and called trolls. It is a balancing act.

I don't know who you are talking about Sabrina. But it is shocking that they are still here. And I haven't seen those threads. That just makes me angry.

Juggling - Actually colluding is the wrong word. But there are women who argue for rape myths, or even what could she expect.

Btw - I find HQ very on-the-ball at deleting previously banned users now - those (very obvious) threads often go quite quickly, depending on the time of day.

But the newcomers I've probably reported most of the mra goaders, some several times - but they remain...

...and I know I'm rubbish at ignoring them - must try harder

There is a poster on FWR (and I think we'll all know who) who claims to be the mother of 2 sons and turns up on all the 'obvious' threads. S/he has admitted she comes here to troll from that mra website, she has said she writes blogs about posters here and reports back to the mra's- and if that's not goady fuckery, and 'here to inflame' -and worthy of a ban- then I don't know what is.

I said on another thread last night that after the launch of WBY, MN told us they would delete rape myths posted on here. HQ were pretty good at banning the trolls at that point, a lot were got rid of, I seem to remember- but somehow, over time this seems to have been commuted to 'well, if they're posted in genuine ignorance, we'll let them stand'. I've reported these to be told 'yes, some people have raped myths ingrained...' - well, delete them, then! They're certainly 'not in the spirit' of WBY.

I have seen a number of threads recently of the 'so upset' or even 'was I raped?' variety where regular posters pile in to tell her it wasn't rape (because she took her own trousers off or whatever) - I'm just too exhausted to enter the pile in tbh.

And isn't it a little harsh to talk about women colluding in their own oppression. Abuse within a relationship, including emotional abuse, can be complex, and not surprising if women try a variety of strategies in an attempt to make living with it bearable for themselves and their DC.

Tell me more about what you would see as colluding in their own oppression ?

Copper - Agree about women who collude in their own oppression. But all you can do is point out what they are doing. The rest is up to them.

Yes MNHQ need more moderators so they can delete quicker. Some Trolls are easy to ignore. But when someone is posting stuff justifying rape for example, you can't leave that unchallenged. To do so sends a message to lurkers that who don't realise it is a troll, that most wome here agree or are not bothered by the statement.

I think I'm quite good at walking away. There are a few posters who get on my nerves a lot (not here ), and I just stop posting when they turn up, because it is boring to hear the same old stuff.

As for MRA I stop reading ... In some ways MRAs are easier to cope with than many women who appear to collude in their own oppression...

hmmm I hadn't thought of it that way around....I assumed that unknowns would get more reporting because people will let royalty get away with stuff....

In fact I know that happens too.

But yes there must be both types of selection bias present.

Gosh this is all awful isn't it?

A part of me does feel that MNHQ should be able to get to rape myth posts quicker....

but a big part of me worries about the royalty affect.

MNHQ have admitted that AF is given far FAR more 'chances' than an unknown posting attacks....is that really okay?

Yes, it has

So far, I have reported 2 threads today - that's unheard of for me...

Yes, you're right - zapping is not fast enough.
What I ment with your example was to not wait until AF got reported, but to just straight off go for the OP. In an attempt to save time.

What offends people can be so variable though: I was on the 'integration' thread recently (you need to know that I am a Bloody Forriner in the UK) and some British people objected to the phrase 'Brit' (as in "my DH is a Brit"), some others, also British, did not mind at all.
I was : I am happy not to use a phrase that offends others, but there simply was no consensus, and I'd be a bit miffed if something like that was deleted.

It is such a judgement call and I agree that generally MNHQ do a good job, but the sites has become too large or staff too few IYKWIM.

Crosspost, LRD.

I think in your example the OP should have been reported. Straight off.
I probably would not bother posting more than once on a thread like that.