Why is slut dressing cool?

I'm not against short/tightly fitted clothing. I'm proud of my body, it's strong and fit and womanly and I like looking like this so I don't generally hide it away. I wouldn't wear shoes I couldn't walk in or anything uncomfortable or inappropriate but I don't feel demeaned if people notice my body in what I'm wearing.

LEM I occasionally put my high heels on and just sit there, enjoying the sensation and wishing I could get up and dance. Though I have discovered Doc Martens are quite comfy now, so that helps ease it a little!

Sorry, but i really think discussing the look IS being judgey, it is judging how someone chooses to dress, therefor judging their choices and by definition judging them.

What is it that you actually feel about women who dress sexily?

Don't get me wrong, i do not like seeing young girls dressed provocatively, that is a different issue, but a beautiful, confident woman - good for her. Even the woman who can't really carry it off - so what, so long as shes happy with it.

have you any contribution to make BangOn? or just a snide little aside

MurderofBanshees - thankyou - a very sensible post!

I used to wear stupidly high shoes back in the 80s, i must admit i look at some of the shoes today and boggle, they look almost impossible to wear :) I would be in A&E before the evening was out im sure if i wore them I definately go for the more comfy look these days but i miss my killer heels

But of course we are judged by other women!

Everyone judges everyone - ridiculous to think otherwise.

Nobody dresses just for themselves unless they carry a full length mirror with them at all times so they are the ones getting the visual stimulation from their look.

If you care about what you wear there is a huge element of making an impression on others. How could there not be?

I imagine every woman who dresses revealingly does it for her own specific reasons.

When I was younger I sometimes dressed in very short skirts. I did this because I really liked my legs, I thought they looked good and I wanted to show them off and enjoy attention and admiration.

I also like attention and admiration for my mind, my soul and my character. I think that's pretty human.

Should say, I would still wear the shoes if I didn't have health problems that make walking even barefoot uncomfortable for me. I still own a lot of the shoes though, and look at them wistfully every now and then.

whole lotta sisterhood on this thread.

words like 'slutty', 'trashy' etc shouldn't be part of a feminist's vocabulary.

Everyone likes different things, if we all liked the same stuff it'd get dull really quick.

Maybe some do it because they think it'll make men happy.
Maybe some do it because they think they have to.
Maybe some just like it.

I know I used to wear the super high heels (I mostly bought fetish footwear, so really high) because I actually liked the way they felt on, odd as it may seem I found them more comfortable than "sensible" shoes.

I also liked how they looked.

Probably there was an element of social conditioning there too, who knows, but I did definitely enjoy how they felt to wear.

I think i stand by my earlier comment - and not being judged by other women...........

My DD is pretty unconventional in the way she looks, she is probably judged by women too most likely they are jealous

I don't think so LEM. I don't think anyone would say that.

as i said upthread I think the issue is muddled because dressing extremely 'provocatively' is fashionable. So someone may be expressing their sexuality or expressing their love of fashion.

What is interesting is why fashion is so hypersexualised. twas ever thus, sure.

Nothing wrong with dressing sexy, and expressing that side of yourself. But I do think if that's the only side of yourself you express, well it's a bit shallow. The reason why that is the only side you emphasise is worthy of analysis, I think.

There's more to all of us than that. Like your daughter, she expresses the athletic side of herself (if that is indeed what clothes do ) when she is on her way to play paintball.

So what you are basically saying then, that these women who dress um, in a way to appear sexually confident? are only doing it to get mens attention then?............its not many steps in the direction of "shes asking for it" really is it

I don't dress that way, i don't have the figure for it, but if i did, i would. My DD dresses for her, she is into 50s retro, she puts alot of effort into the way she looks, she looks fucking stunning and i daresay she gets approving looks from men - anyone who wants to call her a slut can fuck off to the far side of fuck. Most people however tell her she looks amazing - which she does. She doesn't dress that way all the time - she doesn't dress like it for work, or when she plays paintball, or just when she is slumming around, but she enjoys "getting dressed up". Shes 23 and a beautiful young woman who probably wouldn't give a fuck what anyone thinks anyway.

When I see 'over-done-up' girls I think 'do they really think they look good like that?'...And the answer is yes, of course they do, or they wouldn't dress that way.

Conforming is really important to most people, especially young people. There is pressure from peers and media to look grown-up and slebby.

Why else do you think they do it? Do you really think they are deliberately propping up the patriarchy Or are they just responding to society, doing what they think is expected of them and getting ripped to shreds for it from all sides.

I think young women dress like this because it gives them a feeling off confidence and power, our sixth form girls are awful for equating short and tight with grown up.

In fact I think the effect it has is the complete opposite. To me the outfits they wear say, I'm still a little school girl rebelling against the system and/or I'm looking for a boy friend.

They certainly don't same I'm a mature young woman who wants to go to university and get a career, even though I know they do.

It really worries me that we expect men to treat us as equals when so many women take this, caricature, of feminine power into adulthood.

Worst still don't only don't they grow out of it themselves, but they pressure other woman into muddling up smart and sexy too. High heels and lots of make up is not smart business dress, it's going clubbing dress.

It makes us look foolish not powerful and plays straight into the misogamists hands.

And why, OP, is slut shaming cool?

shame on you

Oh no I wasn't going to argue that, not at all. I just object to using the word slut to describe them.

I find it really ironic when people take the piss (not saying people here are, just in general) out of heavily made up/fake tanned etc. women and say something like 'men prefer the natural look anyway'.

Who cares what men prefer? It is always assumed the way women dress is/should be to please men. It stinks.

I feel bad for women who go to a lot of effort with their appearance only to be laughed at or told that men won't fancy them.

So we get beauty products advertised at us for years, lads mags, women's mags, TV, porn etc. telling us to look good and sexy and then suddenly it's 'Whoa! Not too sexy you daft sluts'

I do think too much effort on appearance and 'barbiefication' can hide insecurities but it's 2 sides of the same coin. We are rarely encouraged to be happy as we are.