Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Lapdancing and telling off dh's mate.

365 replies

Manchesterhistorygirl · 02/10/2013 17:41

I blame you lot. Thanks.

Last night dh's friend was telling him all about his recent visit to a lap dancing bar. I told him he and his mates were a bunch of twats and I was disgusted at them all, especially since they all have partners.

I also told dh if I ever found out he'd done the same it'd be the absolute last thing he ever did.

So my nest of vipers, thank you for giving me the confidence to handle a situation I've always found disgusting, but wouldn't have ever spoken out about until I joined here.

OP posts:
BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 15:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 15:10

I haven't read anywhere the OP threatening to kill her DP, she made an off the cuff remark about it being the last thing he'd do.

Like you said, figure of speech, I read it being picked up on as goady.

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 15:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Keepithidden · 03/10/2013 15:05

Fair enough, thanks for one feminist's opinion Buffy!

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 15:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 15:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Twiddlebum · 03/10/2013 14:59

Yougotbale..... I'll see you down the club! GrinWine

Keepithidden · 03/10/2013 14:58

Sorry to be a bit of a dunce here, but if an equal society existed would the presence of lapdancing clubs of both kinds still be an issue? I find them distatseful and see why people view them as akin to an affair, but I can also see why some people don't take that viewpoint and see them as another kind of entertainment.

Assuming the market is there and the participants aren't coerced is there anything intrinsically wrong with these establishments (from a feminist perspective) or is it simply because they purr*petuate the male-centric path society seems to be heading increasingly down?

  • Had to get kiittens in there somewhere!
Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 14:58

Buffy - not controlling because she gave an opinion. Controlling and abusive for threatening death. Even if it was a joke DV isn't that funny.

comingalongnicely · 03/10/2013 14:57

It's not what you said, it's possibly the way you said it.

What's going to make him think about his actions more?

A bit of a chat, some adult discussion & some pointers to get him thinking

or

"some stupid cow swearing & banging on at me" (Which is what he'll be saying to all & sundry).

I don't think you're wrong to express your opinion, I just don't think you did it in the most effective way if you expected to make a difference....

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 14:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 14:52

Buffy - she didn't refuse to shut up, she just gave an opinion in her own home. Her default position isn't shutting the fuck up.

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 14:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 14:50

Shall we continue the debate down the strip club? I'll get the first round

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 14:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 14:47
Grin
Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 14:46

Every time I give an opinion I will start a thread about it.

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 14:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Twiddlebum · 03/10/2013 14:45

Sorry, am I supposed to get my grammar book out now??? So people that aren't good at English are looked down on by you??

Twiddlebum · 03/10/2013 14:44

Doesn't sound like you're having much fun though tbh!

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 14:44

Pelted by burning bras?

Do you mean 'pelted with burning bras?

Either way, OP is allowed to state her point of view you know, life is certainly too short to stfu about things you don't agree with.

Twiddlebum · 03/10/2013 14:43

Haha!!! One thing I like is you guys can't stand people having an opinion without getting your knickers in a twist when the thing you're arguing about is being allowed to have an opinion!!! Smile

BuffytheFeministFeminist · 03/10/2013 14:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 14:39

Are you saying women have fat arses or can't use doors?

LurcioLovesFrankie · 03/10/2013 14:37

Don't let the door hit your arse on the way out.

Swipe left for the next trending thread