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Original poster

Relationships between school girls and teachers

36 replies

MrsTerryPratchett · 25/08/2013 02:07

I was reading the National Enquirer. Yes, I know. I do read proper, enlightening, real news but I need something for the toilet too. There were two articles that struck me as weird and worth noting. One about Monica Lewinsky and one about Lauren Silverman, Simon Cowell's married GF.

Both mentioned that these women had been sexually abused relationships with married teachers at school. In both cases this was seen as evidence that the women were temptresses and morally bankrupt. 'Always been like this' was the message.

Now, I would think that even an idiot could see that a girl who was vulnerable and targeted by a male, older, married teacher might have some issues later on. I have no idea if they were under the age of consent when they were abused by these men. In both cases I know that the men were; older; married; in loco parentis; teachers FFS.

It's crap like this that makes me think that we have a huge mountain to climb. If I think that the women concerned may have problems with appropriate sexuality because of what happened to them and the NE is convinced that they were always to blame, even as children, how do we change that? Blaming child victims of sexual abuse? I have no idea.

OP posts:
arsenaltilidie · 27/08/2013 01:05

I was reading a story on how Poppy was robbed of her iphone by Abdul and the basic premise was Poppy shouldnt have been walking in an immigrant area....
...
....
Its not that some immigrants find it easy to rob. Its the fact they enjoy doing it. Its not like British people don't steal too. Its the fact a tall, well built immigrant seems to be helpless at the sight of Poppy listening to her music. Pathetic and very worrying.

Not PHWOAR like some men seem to think about school girls
What you are describing is a paedophile.

The problem with feminism nowadays is its all sensationalising. You write like the daily mail, in the pretence of being good, but on the other hand pretty much slating the whole gender.

Original poster
MrsTerryPratchett · 26/08/2013 23:36

If that were the case, surely women would fancy skinny, Goth, pale boys with faint mustaches (or was that just me at 15). Now, I look at boys like that and think, "awwww, he would have been my boyfriend at 15, I wonder if DD will go out with boys like him". Not "PHWOAR" like some men seem to think about school girls.

I also wonder if it's all tied up with the penchant in the media for very slim, almost breastless, completely hairless women as the ideal.

It's not just the fact that some men find them attractive, though. It's the fact that they get a bloody pass. It's not like no women ever fancy inappropriate men. It's the fact that a married, older, position of authority figure seems to be helpless in the sights of a school girl. Pathetic and very worrying.

OP posts:
YoniTime · 26/08/2013 21:26

Perhaps Sal, unfortunately also for some (too many) the knowledge that someone very young is easy to fool/seduce/abuse.

SinisterSal · 26/08/2013 21:02

I wonder is it some type of arrested development type thing. Most guys first sexual attractions would be to young teens in school uniform, the girls in their class at school. Maybe that sticks, in some cases?

EldritchCleavage · 26/08/2013 18:40

I agree with rosa.

Also, It's all dealt with, if at all, on a schmaltzy, TV movie of the week sort of level. People are very very uncomfortable talking about the real effects and damage of sexual abuse in any kind of candid, responsible way. Like how it can have an effect on sexual behaviours and people can find their sexuality focused on people like the abuser.

toomanyfionas · 25/08/2013 12:05

You are so right. We have a long way to go

Original poster
MrsTerryPratchett · 25/08/2013 12:02

It does make me worry about that too, that there are a lot of people who are attracted to young people. It also sends a message to the young women that this is OK. I remember singing along to Don't Stand So Close to Me. I loved Sting. He was a teacher at one point.

OP posts:
TheDoctrineOfPositivityYes · 25/08/2013 09:08

A cousin of mine who has a hobby that he's good enough to teach makes jokes about "teenage girls hanging off his every word" at his course (mixed sexes attend and all aged 16+).

He's twice their age and married and would never do anything but it's a totally acceptable "wink wink nudge nudge" subject - which builds into the "sexy schoolgirl" stuff.

TheDoctrineOfPositivityYes · 25/08/2013 08:58

Yy rosa.

rosabud · 25/08/2013 07:49

I do agree and it makes me wonder something else too - the fact that "general thinking" is so reluctant to change on this topic, does it actually signal that, deep down, many people in our society ARE attracted to children/very young adults and this perceived notion that some very young female adults are "gagging for it" helps to ease the thought of this very uncomfortable truth? It's almost an accepted part of our popular culture from Lolita to St Trinian's to the Britney Spears video. In fact, the very juxtaposition of moral outrage stories on paedophiles alonside sexualised pictures of young girls is serving this denial - "don't worry, yo're not a monster like the horrible bloke who had nasty pictures on his computer, your fantasy with teens in school uniform is with proper women who are gagging for it."

flummoxedlummox · 25/08/2013 02:21

Agree, there is still agenda promoted by large sections of both print and broadcast media juxtaposing moral outrage next to sexualised portrayal of young women. Makes me vom, but I still read the Daily Mail on occasion just to recharge my anger.