To be baffled at the male assumption that random women will wish to engage in sexual inuendo

I think what you are saying is that a truly feminist society would have us acting as though we hadn't gone through puberty and never made social misjudgements. I agree that perhaps that ideal is worth working towards but I also think that sometimes silly flirting is fun. The example given is in my opinion crass.. and obv misjudged, but to expand that to a crisis in male female interaction is a bit much.. OP is obv catastrophising.. which is fine.. but building up an eggshell for men to crack seems tiresome to me

Can we pretty much agree it is always rude and crass to basically proposition a woman you've never met before when emailing her about your children's library books?

yes it is.. but not always. .

It's not "difficult" it's "rude" "crass" "offensive" and "inappropriate"

oh.dear.lord.

it is difficult this as the case mentioned seems crass.. and wet tshirt is such an unrefined joke..but some flirting is sometines ok.. and a good way to bond.. but betterimages there are..headmaster in wet t-shirt..mmm.hot! not 'u have tits huh..huh..'

a woman I used to go out with and flirt with recently balked at something that would have been way into freindship flirting/innuendo the other day..because she was feeling v unsexy and read it as nasty sarcasm...

the answer is that sometimes its ok and funny..sometimes it isnt and that also depends on how well you know each other..the context (in above case it was flirting in organing email thread which is wierd) and on how trustworthy each finds the other..

innuendo noticing happens between same sex friends as well as men to women and women and men. some men are definitely more crass and 'on the buses' and some are more aware and taking the piss out of that stance.. u just need to know when..

it is difficult this as the case mentioned seems crass.. and wet tshirt is such an unrefined joke..but some flirting is sometines ok.. and a good way to bond.. but betterimages there are..headmaster in wet t-shirt..mmm.hot! not 'u have tits huh..huh..'

a woman I used to go out with and flirt with recently balked at something that would have been way into freindship flirting/innuendo the other day..because she was feeling v unsexy and read it as nasty sarcasm...

the answer is that sometimes its ok and funny..sometimes it isnt and that also depends on how well you know each other..the context (in above case it was flirting in organing email thread which is wierd) and on how trustworthy each finds the other..

innuendo noticing happens between same sex friends as well as men to women and women and men. some men are definitely more crass and 'on the buses' and some are more aware and taking the piss out of that stance.. u just need to know when..

and send it accidentally to his wife

I think you should have said that Grey, "! am an adult woman and parent running a library and am emailing you from your child's school on school business. I wonder why you felt that an appropriate question to ask?"

ARF

Exactly Hully - that's why I found the p*k on GN so creepy - I know he's getting off on it. And I know it's almost certainly the case that he can't get it off any other way - yuk!!

I love that woman.

yes, like the woman who sent that man's penis shot to his mum. There should be a lot more of that.

I would be tempted to forward to his OH and ask her to have a word...

I find it extraordinary. But it's like groping, it's not about you, it's about them, and what they want. That little twinge in the Yfronts when they say Benny Hill things.

Basically they are just raving wankpots

Yes I agree with prom queen. This isn't evens feminist viewpoint, although feminist would share it. It's just a "being a person" thing.

Now who's paranoid?

How can anyone silence you? This is a forum; you can go and post where you want.

You came onto this thread and took a deeply disengenuous stance. You're defending behaviour that you know you'd never exhibit yourself (namely, to nudge in sexual innuendo with someone you've never met and have no idea about), just as you inevitably disagree on all feminist topics.

And then when people pick you up on it - you get your knickers in a twist.

What did you expect, really?

How are we supposed to react to you? You clearly think feminism is a load of twaddle, you say as much on any given thread. Are we just supposed to tolerate your disdain for it? Why can't we pull you up on it, and disagree?

Argue right back, then.

As far as I can make out, the only person who'd be silencing you would be you. You know, if it occurred to you that you'd been rumbled, and you were, perhaps, a little embarrassed. If this doesn't describe you, then stand your ground!

'Not that paranoid; you only post on feminist topics to disagree.'

And if there is a thread in AIBU saying 'Is it OK for men to assume ALL women are up for sexual innuendo' you'd stay far away I suppose, even if the OP said 'this is a thread for people who agree with me only'. You would hold back from expressing your opinion? If there is a topic that you disagree with, I don't see any feminist keeping their counsel. far from it. So why do I have to? Such breathtaking double standards, and completely expected.

Sick of you trying to silence me.

Not that paranoid; you only post on feminist topics to disagree.

I'm clearly not the only one to notice it, either. Odd way to pass the time, but each to their own.

Anyone else shocked by the goings-on on Gransnet?

Frankly I like a bit of innuendo, or flirting, from men who I enjoy engaging in that with. When a person "joins in" it is quite obvious, yes? An if they don't join in you STOP. This is basic human interaction.

TBH a person who insists on engaging with "banter" of a sexual nature with a person who is not joining in, in harassing them, IMO. Especially in a situation which is not social (like the OP).