Small things that make you angry and you feel you can't mention elsewhere

Also relatives asking "Is he good around the house?" Of my 38 year old husband like they are asking about whether a puppy is house trained or not! Just the idea that by him doing housework he is helping me out, rather than just keeping his own living space hygienic makes me scream inside.

I could post on this thread all night - it has ignited a rage in me!!! Ha ha

It is like it is a crime to be talented and successful in a certain vocation and shock horror also be a woman. It makes me cringe every time it is used - often by my DH. He also used to say things like "she drives a nice car. I wonder what her husband does?" ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHH
He now just does this to wind me up. So very annoying.

yes,yes to hating career woman.sounds like species or an aberration
usually used in pejorative way to imply husk who's put money before family
career man?no of course not,as it expected men are career minded whereas women it's kids and cats

The phrase "career woman" makes me want to weep. Ever heard anyone say "career man"? No. Thought not.

I've seen some thing that at the school DS1 (4) is starting in September, that made me a bit angry.

They have a display in the hall that they children have lunch in that talks all about what they should be eating, and how lunch boxes should be healthy and contain x, y, z etc healthy thing.

Then at the bottom, above a photograph of a grinning student is a speech bubble which reads "Mums are putting too many sugary and fatty foods in our lunch boxes". I mean WTAF is that all about.

I'm just wondering whether to say something as I really think it's a shitty message to give children - mums are in charge of caring for the children and are to blame for everything and dad's get 'let off the hook'. But will I be labelled as that mother who pointed out that their display was sexist? Arrrggghhhh! I shouldn't care what they think, and it seems such a little thing but I know it should be challenged....

Smudging - that's made me feel really good.

YoungBritish I took dd1 to work with me for a day a few years ago. School was closed when I arrived to drop her off (snow) so I rang my school to ask if they wanted me there with dd1 in tow, or not there because I had no childcare (I know her father should have equal responsibility about childcare but he has never met her, denying any responsibility from 3 months pg). They decided they wanted me there. Quite a few women have brought their children to work with them in emergencies, I've never seen a man do it at our work though, probably because they all have wives or partners who take care of the children .

I am currently annoyed about the number of comments we have now had about dp dropping down to part time hours in order to spend more time with dd2. Apparently it's very odd for him to do that, but would be perfectly normal if it was me . We're both her parents.

I use lady to talk about one woman, especially when talking to dd2 as people seem to think it's more polite than talking about 'the woman'. We even talk about the ladies at playgroup, because that's how they refer to themselves (although I do try to talk about the grown-ups rather than the ladies)

Smudging there's an online petition to ask the editor of The Sun to stop having a 'Page 3 girl'. It's attracting quite a bit of attention.

x-post, Clanger! It just doesn't work as well for groups, does it? And I have no idea why. Perhaps because it sounds too much like the patronising dismissal of using 'laydees' or 'fine gentlemen' to bunch together a group of individuals into less than their component parts?

Plural versus singular, perhaps? I don't think I ever say 'the ladies over there', or 'the gentlemen over there' - it would be the men or the women.

It appears I put no thought into what I say whatsoever. How depressing.

I use "lady" when I'm referring indirectly to a woman I don't know, especially if she is older. If I can use another noun, like "passenger" (at work), I prefer that - it just sounds better.

I wouldn't refer to a group of women I was with as "ladies".

I am thinking about use of 'lady' too. I work for an organisation with very feminist principles and you do NOT call each other 'ladies' there, it's 'women'. So much so that you wouldn't use the term 'manning' a stall (for example), you would be 'womanning' it. That kind of thing is said a bit joking but would still be pointed out in a lighthearted way if you were to say you were manning something.

However I always say to dd (age 2) that she needs to pay the lady/say thank you to the lady etc etc when out and about. Hmmmm...

Nope, I do that too. Been watching out for it based on this thread. I do say "Mind out for that lady" etc to my children a lot. But I also say "don't walk into that gentleman", and yes I use it when I am slightly removed from the person I am talking about. It jut seems more polite.

I don't think that's a big issue. It's more the 'ladies' as a dismissive-ish term.

Mm, I use 'lady'. Thinking about when I use it, it's if I have a query at work from someone, or if I'm pointing out someone for some reason, so I'll say 'this lady needs to speak to...', or 'the lady over there said...', so it's only when I'm dealing at one remove with someone, and always where I would use 'gentleman' as well, should the equipment be of the other kind.

I don't know why, but saying 'the woman over there', or 'the man over there' always sounds a bit dismissive. Thinking about it now, I think I come over as bonkers sounding actually - I was in the garage the other week and talking to the man on the desk, pointed to the 'gentleman over there who changed my tire', in actuality a grumpy, acne'd youth. Just hope they don't think I was taking the mickey.

At a job I had 10 or so years ago, a man brought in his DD a couple of times, once for an entire day - as it was an emergency.

Everyone commented on how sweet it was and what a good dad he was. I was thinking, no woman would get away with this shit.

A shop assistant in tescos once tried to refuse to sell me a triple sandwich on the grounds that they are for men.

That the one dad who regularly did school pick up was allowed to be late every single day. Non of the women rushing back from work pulled that stunt day in day out.

Smudging have you seen the Child Eyes campaign? Aims to get sexualised images out of children's eyesight in shops and other public spaces. There's a petition and everything. Have a look on FB if you're on there :)

ahh,yes men getting plaudits when looking after own kids.as if going extra mile
a man changing nappy,sorting kids isn't great.it's doing what he should do
but women gushing gratitude over what I'd expect. as agiven,it's depressing

That when men do their fair share of household chores and child care, their wives refer to them as "petty good."

I'd use lady or woman I guess (but mostly woman, I think unlees speaking about an older "lady" ), would use man or guy too. I think "young lady" which is patronizing as fuck when speaking to a grown woman and "ladybus driver or "ladydoctor" or Arsenal ladies team was what gave most people the rage. Probably why using it in general conversation also makes their teeth itch