Small things that make you angry and you feel you can't mention elsewhere

YY to food choices in restaurants! If I ever order mussels they invariably get given to dh. Steak = masculine I'm familiar with as a concept, but mussels?

CBBC, - An overweight 'laddish' male introduces the programmes. could you ever imagine an overweight, funny, young female in that role

This phrase annoys me amost as much as "having it all"

"Feminism is about choice"

No it isn't, feminism is about women having equal rights to men. Consumerism is about choice.

Well if you're being told that officially then it's discrimination

That where I work, if you have a vagina you can't possibly go on the forklift course or be taught any of the warehousing stuff, but I can go on the First Aid course, because women are good at that sort of thing!

Hullmum that would annoy me too.

As does the odd look I got at PTA (all women) for having beer not wine.

The pubs wine is nasty, I don't see why I should drink bad wine in an area with good beer just because I'm female.

eurgh, she sounds lovely. I hope you complained!

On the name-changing topic I just see it as a choice you can make not a given. As for my children's surname that was also decided in partnership with my husband. I actually found my surname a burden as a child: it is unusual, tricky to spell and rhymes badly for primary school! But by the time I was an adult it was MINE!

Hull the teacher in question knew all the surnames, she was just being judgemental, she also told me my son couldn't spell because of our accent- we are not from these parts! I then made a decision with the next school and the next child to blend in a bit more!

Order a proper beer and a Bud and guess which one gets placed in front of you

Shameful . At least I have taught dh about proper drinks now so I don't get his embarrassing beers placed in front of me.

Ray, good point.

Re rare steak and medium steak, try ordering the beef or the lamb when DH has ordered the fish or the chicken or the risotto. See how often it's mixed up..,

hull- exactly the same arguments here. DS is not MY baby he is ours and when in the house he is not looking after him for me! TBF OH has never said babysit or anything. It's just the way he wanders off means he clearly think DS should be my responsibility!

If it ever occured to them that they might not change their name they should know exactly why you are so picky.

I am annoyed on your behalf, they really ought to know better

ray

Dh and I had one or two arguments about him buggering off to the toilet without telling me first, this seems ridiculous but he is one of those people who really revels in spending a half hour on the toilet. And he bloody locks the door.

I told him I don't get a half hour to wander off without teling him what I am doing , and that worse when I am at home alone there have been times (before I got the nap schedule down and when I was still bf) where I had to go to the toilet with a baby attached to me rather than let them scream the house down.

He's learned now thank god, but it did get me that he really didn't know he had to ask before just fucking off to shave or do some personal business when I hadn't even brushed my teeth that day etc.

I come at this from the opposite perspective, though - I can't comment on it at all in RL since virtually none of my mates didn't change their names and apparently drawing attention to the fact I did (eg., by correcting people who get it wrong) is rude and judgy

No, it isn't rude and judgy. It's rude to ignore the fact that you know your friend's name and that to pretend you know better than her by calling her another name is a really shitty thing to do.

Please don't feel bad correcting people.

I changed my name, it was for personal reasons. And if I got your name wrong I would be absolute embarrassed that I got it wrong, apologize, and then move on. I would certainly no more feel judged than if I gave a muslim a bit of pork and they said sorry I don't eat pork. But again, I would apologize and then move on. *

Has anyone actually said to you that they feel you are attacking their personal choices? Because if they have you really need to call them on it next time and explain that they really needn't put their insecurities on to you. I anything I would would wonder if they have a problem with your decision if they continually call you by the wrong name.

I don't like that I am the default person in the house for DS. OH just wanders off and leaves him. It's like he looks after him as a favour to me when I am cooking or washing but then he is mine if we are both free! Grrrr.

out for meal etc,they pass the bill to male in group
not the women

Ha! Because of course Stormy, that would have been your first thought in the decision making process!

My brother's expecting his first child in October. Apparently this means I didn't need to give DD my surname after all, because he's ensuring the family surname continues into the next generation.

I have also had the opposite in a car showroom. I went with DH but had no interest. The sales guy directed his speech at us both equally, and if DH made a decision about some aspect of the car, he would glance my way to get my consent.
I didn't care!

So aim pissd off that the Belgians don't respect my choice I guess, though I love their general rule.