Ladies, don't go out alone at night

GotMyGoat glad you found it useful!

Yes. Same here. We had a case last summer as well where a woman was approached and intimidated, but thankfully escaped unharmed.

The response was a rush to purchase personal alarms and insist that no female go out unaccompanied.

It is more likely for a man to be mugged than for a woman to be raped if walking alone at night.

More rapes happen at home than attacks outside the house. So the way for women to keep safe is for them to go out.

But what actually makes a woman at risk has nothing to do with her clothes or make up or where she is. A woman is at risk if there is a rapist nearby.

The rapist is the problem, not the park or her skirt.

Yes Hearts, stranger rapes are rare. Most women who are sexually abused are abused by people they know or who are acquainted with.

And one of the things I have learned on MN is how much more likely women are to be raped, attacked etc by people they know rather than some random stranger in a dark park.

Implying that women can keep themselves safe (putting the onus on the women) by not walking alone, not wearing short skirts, not drinking too much is therefore a total fallacy, no?

I live in Banbury... where did this happen? How awful. Such a small, low crime ordinary town (you'd think) with a rapist on the loose.

I know it's horrid to think of 'blaming the victim' but if my daughter were 10 years older I'd be warning her not to walk alone late at night in a miniskirt. I have walked past teenage lads in the town centre in daylight hours loudly assessing whether passing women are 'up for it' based on their style of clothing - who's to say one of them with a drink or ten inside him isn't a potential rapist?

I can see why some women would walk through a park at night. I went to college with a girl who worked nights in a bar, she took a short cut home through a park. I thought she was mad but she always said she felt the short walk was safer than the longer walk she would have to take if she avoided it. She always said you met more men on the streets and that the park was usually totally empty.

I really hope the woman in your area GotMyGoat is okay and that they catch this guy soon.

It is sad that parks are seen as somewhere to be avoided after dark but I guess they have always been seen as areas for unsavoury behaviour after hours (I sound like my mother).

And I agree that it doesn't place any blame on the victim, we (make and female) should be able to walk in any public place whenever we want whatever time of day or night.

I know the case you've referred to as I am near by, and I have been somewhat frustrated too by the "lock up your daughters" kind of posts that have popped up on FB.

OK found it - here it is

Here at Bristol Feminist Network, we believe that women's freedoms should not be curtailed by the actions of one or some men. Therefore we were disappointed that the initial police response to Joanna Yeates' murder was to warn women to be afraid of walking home alone in the dark, whilst the police search for the perpetrator.

We believe that this warning perpetuates the myth that women are somehow responsible for any attack that happens to them. But violent crime, sexual assault, even murder, are not natural hazards that women can somehow avoid if they follow a set of rules. The only person who is ever responsible for a violent crime is the perpetrator. Never the victim.

Women should not have to change their daily lives thanks to the actions of one or some men. Women should not have to feel afraid, or vulnerable. Women should not be made to feel responsible or ashamed for the violence committed against them.

We are pleased that the police have decided to amend their message to the public, encouraging women to carry on with their daily lives and not be afraid in their surroundings. We hope that they continue with this message.

looks like Thames Valley police have form for this type of thing..

(link is to a Bristol based feminist's blog. I am sure there is something on there about the Bristol feminist group's complaints to the police after Joanna Yeates' murder but I can't find it at the moment)

I used to live in Banbury near Moorfields park and although I happily walk most places alone at night, I wouldn't go through the park. But neither would dh! I agree it shouldn't be down to women to modify their behaviour because of the actions of one man - but I would try to educate all my children (I have girls and boys) how to assess risk and act sensibly. In my experience, men are at more risk of attack (generally not sexually) at night due to muppets spoiling for a fight

That's my point, a rapist will rape, regardless. Rape isn't to do with sexuality but about power and control. They will find their victim.

Yes, you're very right re warning sons. I have two sons, one of whom is gay. I worry about both of them, but for very different reasons ...

dublinrose, you are absolutely right. It's just very difficult, as I'm sure you also know, when it's so close/specific to your own area. And I do absolutely hate the whole idea that women should be the ones to change their behaviour.

It always comes back to "women, modify your behaviour".

I agree that no one, male or female should take risks but sometimes you have no choice. You sometimes have no option but to go where an attack has taken place if you live there or work there.

I work in an office close to a lonely canal walk where a girl was killed a few years back, I often work late and yeah I do find myself looking around and being wary but I can't let one random attack scare me. I can't always rely on someone to pick me up and I can't afford taxis. And I have to work.

Rather than focus on the few cases where something terrible has happend I prefer to remember that many women walk around on their own at night and nothing ever happens to them and that's all I can do.

Do you think the police have specific intelligence that this rapist is targeting a particular type of victim and it is not a generalisation that all women are potential victims due to their behaviour. It seems this rapist will rape regardless.

also agree with BIWI, but there should be 2 campaigns, running side by side

if it's anything like something that happened locally, there was lots of 'ladies, don't get in taxis alone, wear short skirts, go anywhere alone, there's a rapist on the loose' - i'm really loathe to say this, but i did start to feel sorry for the men - the police were virtually encouraging women to treat all men as suspicious until they'd caught the one they needed too.