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Original poster

Is sexual orientation a choice?

441 replies

WidowWadman · 13/06/2012 20:00

Julie Bindel seems to think so.

Is it just me or is that actually fairly offensive?

OP posts:
HotheadPaisan · 13/06/2012 21:51

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motherinferior · 13/06/2012 21:48

It's not, er, exactly a new pov though, is it. We've been round this block in feminism many, many times since at least the late 1970s. Back when I was a gel, it was extremely bad form to say you were a feminist if you weren't also a political lesbian. And bi-bashing was rife. Spread AIDS into the community of Good Separatists and all, bisexual wimmin did, allegedly.

noddyholder · 13/06/2012 21:45

There are schools of thought that consider sexuality fluid and that choice comes from how you are raised Who knows? I think you are born as you are fwiw

EclecticShock · 13/06/2012 21:41

Because people might not agree with you beachcomber? That's no reason not to air your view.

Himalaya · 13/06/2012 21:17

Only4tonight -

I tend to agree with you - probably a spectrum, with a bit of choice/ flexibility in the middle (similarly, from my own and friends experiences growing up).

I understand there is a statistically significant association netween boys having older brothers and being gay. But the link only relates to biological sibs or half sibs with the same mother, not whether boys grows up together - I.e. It is a nature-nurture effect of gestating in a womb that has already carried male foetuses. This obviously isn't a singular explanation, but interesting.

On a practical/ political level I think people should be free to have sex or not with whoever they want to (on a mutual basis...)

Beachcomber · 13/06/2012 21:17

But it is political analysis. Although I think she is being judgemental too.

There is a political side to lesbianism and there is a lesbian side/contribution/role/culture to feminist politics.

I'm loath to discuss it here though because of the atmosphere in here at the moment.

only4tonight · 13/06/2012 20:34

I also wonder why people care who other people sleep with that much?

Original poster
WidowWadman · 13/06/2012 20:30

I agree with you LittleMiss. Just wonder how long it'll be until someone swings by to say "oh, it's not judging, just analysis"...

OP posts:
only4tonight · 13/06/2012 20:30

I have thought about this a lot due to some friends various situations.

I believe that sexuality is a spectrum and where you fall on that spectrum is not a choice. If you fall at either end of the spectrum you have no choice but if you are nearer the middle you can choose which kind of person you wish to seek out.

I know gay people who would never have chosen that lifestyle growing up due to the personal pressures it put on them (some lost /nearly lost everything, friends, family, religion, community etc). Bit I also know of 1 person who uses sexuality as more of a political statement than anything else.

LittleMissSomersault · 13/06/2012 20:24

It's the last sentence that offended me the most: "I believed then, and I believe now, that if bisexual women had an ounce of sexual politics, they would stop sleeping with men". That sounds like a judgement of bisexual women to me.

Original poster
WidowWadman · 13/06/2012 20:20

Can you translate that into English for me, please?

OP posts:
HotheadPaisan · 13/06/2012 20:17

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Original poster
WidowWadman · 13/06/2012 20:12

I think it matters, it's usually the homophobic right wing which is pretending that being gay is a lifestyle choice.

OP posts:
HotheadPaisan · 13/06/2012 20:10

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EclecticShock · 13/06/2012 20:04

I think people should have a choice in who they sleep with, no matter what sex they are or the other person.

expatinscotland · 13/06/2012 20:01

She's a moron with two much time on her hands.

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