Sex positive parenting blog

I have just read about Barbie, it's the strangest way of thinking about children and childhood, really quite creepy.

Answered it.

Poll is up sexpositiveparenting.wordpress.com/2012/05/10/blog-name-poll/

racking my brains and those were the best names that came up but if anyone can think of any other better ones please shout!

SeaHouses- I don't disagree that not everyone is sexual as an adult but would argue that being "sex positive" (by the blog definition) should encompass that- like you say "an accepting attitude to human sexuality" would also include people who are asexual. I wouldn't think it implies those people are sex negative at all.

Am going to start the poll in a second so if anyone has any genius name ideas- please share!

When I was referring the reclaiming and appropriation (which I did do when I couldn't really find the words I meant and had little time) I was referring to the way that 'sex positive' feminists have decided that you can only be positive about sex if you do so through porn, lap dancing etc. to describe someone as sex positive, which are words that have their own meaning, shouldn't carry this baggage. It's like the pro sex anti porn statement. Being pro sex needs to be detached from the way that 'sex positive' feminists have appropriated from general language usage. Although in reality, I'm not really big on reclaiming stuff like that anyway.

Given the awful sex-negative war on women being enacted in America at the moment (and no, just in case anyone's tired or feeling unusually bitey, I am NOT using that term for a feminist strawperson, I am referring to the insane abstinence-peddling rightwing woman-haters) I think this blog is brilliant and much needed.

That is a really good point sea.

I don't want to give the impression I don't like the blog; I think it is interesting and entertaining.

I suppose I just don't see sex as the focus of parenting. I think that not being ashamed of the body is really important, but I don't think the body or even the naked body are primarily associated with sex, so I don't think sex positive encapsulates that idea very well. I also don't see my role as being to support my children into being sexual adults because not everyone is sexual as an adult, which I don't think implies that those people are 'sex negative.'

But maybe I'm overthinking this. I think being positive about the body is really important though, and I suppose there isn't a good term that springs to mind that is about having a healthy attitude to bodies and an accepting attitude to human sexuality.

I think I will and do a poll!

You could do a blog post about it? It would be interesting.

I think not being ashamed of your body is an important bit of feminism.

Talking about more than just feminist parenting though. Blog aims to look at bringing up kids not to be ashamed of their bodies, to support their development into sexual adults who can form successful relationships.
So yes sex education/ relationships education is part of it.

Wasn't using term in "rah rah prostitution is feminist" approach at all - was a term used by sex educators- eg. brook be sex positive campaign www.brook.org.uk/sex-positive

We are pondering a namechange given the confusion but its one of those things you maybe don't realise til you have feedback! very helpful thanks.

sea - I'd want to reclaim both terms. I'm sick of the implication that feminists can't like sex. Maybe that is too simple? But both 'sex' and 'positive' have meanings that predate that coinage, so it should be possible to say, no, actually we will use them in our own way, thanks.

I suppose that isn't so much reclaiming a term, as challenging a label, but I can imagine this blog could be a good way to do that.

Yes SeaHouses. It's not possible to reclaim a term that never meant anything else in the first place. It doesn't make sense.

I'm also not sure what is wrong with the term feminism, if people are talking about bringing their children up in non-stereotyped ways.

I don't understand what it is meant to mean though. I don't know what we would be reclaiming it to mean.

I would love to see the term 'sex positive' reclaimed, but I think you'd need to be really explicit about it if that's what you want to do ... otherwise it is confusing IMO.

I think the focus as you explain it sounds interesting and I've sent the link to a friend who I know has been looking for a bit of guidance on how to talk to her DD about sex in a positive way (hope that's ok).

The term sex positive was never appropriated. It was invented for the "rah rah prostitution is feminist" approach.

In praise of Barbie ??????

I don't really understand why you'd take a term "sex positive" which already has a specific political meaning (pro BDSM, sex industry etc) and apply it to parenting. It seems a little odd.

I'm also not sure I'm understanding either why you would centre your parenting around sex. You've put this in Women's Rights, do you mean "feminist parenting" because that sounds quite interesting.

I think every parent would agree with the second paragraph, so I'm not sure what the blog is about. Is it to talk about sex education or something?

Like the idea, but as others have mentioned the name really is a barrier. I wouldn't want to have to keep explaining that the name doesn't mean I'm all for kids lap dancing. But it is a shame that the term has been appropriated like that, so maybe you can reclaim it.

Ooh do you have a link for it? Will have a nose...

waves at No longer Suwoo :D

I knew this was going to be you! You won't know me under this name. I was suwoo.

Lady curd it can be a minefield all right. Remembered too late there's a debate on that term on this board right now and did not mean to drag the issue across threads.
Best of luck with theblog

Ah thanks! Plantsitter are you on wordpress? If so I can add you as a contributer? If not msg me and email and I will send you instructions on how to join.

Makes sense- there are issues with the term "sex positive" and it's a blimming minefield and needs clear definition which is what am trying to make clear in blog, with hindsight a better name needs to be thought of but is tricky to change the name on the blog now and had to set up the blog first, a few of us are thinking of others names but will leave it as is for now, until we think of summat better.

By "appropriate context" I was actually thinking I didn't want anyone to think the blog was about sex with children or having your kids watch you have sex or anything weird like that! (But I anticipate there maybe posts of "oh god our kids burst in on us having sex!). But obviously is difficult to define by who's definition of "appropriate" are we working? Any ideas how to better phrase that?

I think the blog may end up having a few controversial posts and at the minute I am not planning on censoring them but inviting people to comment and critique them but I guess we will cross that bridge when we come to it.