SAHM of boys

yes the tidying your own mess is a big thing in this house too.

thank you. at first i got very frustrated. i was expecting too much from my dc. i thought i would tell them once and they would know and then when they were forgetting things i would get annoyed and decide it was easier just for me to do it but we are about a year down the line from when i started with it and i can see the habits setting in. ds1 notices when the red light come on in the tumble dryer and can now empty the tank without even telling me he is doing it. he just does it (which i love). ds2 knows his washing goes in the basket and then in the machine. ds1 does the powder when the machine is full and will sometimes empty the clothes in to the basket without me asking. he hasn't mastered sorting what can be tumbled and what cant but he does lots of other stuff that even i as a child was never made to do (or appreciate that my mum did)

My DS (6) understands that I worked hard for a degree and worked hard in a job before I had him and his younger sister. He understands that some mums go to work and some stay at home and also understands some of the reasons why this might be. I think this is fine - to see a variety of set ups amongst the parents of his friends and to understand that different things work for different people. Children in his class are picked up by a variety of people - mums, dads, grandparents, (almost) grown up siblings, nannies, after school care etc etc.

well i am a single SAHM of 2 boys (6 and 2). so as far as my dcs are concerned, mums do everything and dads turn up every 8 weeks or so to take you to granny's so you can play xbox "why cant we have xbox at hoooooommmmeeeee??"

i will watch this thread because i am really struggling to see how i can set a good example of what a man is or what equal parenting is without the prescence of a good man to help me. we dont have good male role models in our family.

what i do right now is talk very much about 'our' house and 'our' jobs. the dcs dont 'help' me with the dishes or hoovering, they do it as one of their own jobs that means 'we' (rather than I) have a tidy clean house. they are both responsible for recognising when stuff has run out. the toilet rolls are easy to change in my house and i encourage them to ask me for help if they can't manage something, rather than doing it for them.