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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Working mum. SAHDad. Support?

78 replies

BlingLoving · 20/01/2012 17:59

Not sure where to put this, but figure that ultimately, a working mum and a stay at home dad is a feminist issue, or perhaps the result of feminism? Anyway, I realise that while DH is currently not getting much support, there are support options out there ? 1000s of blogs written by men in his situation; every SAHM we know taking him under their wing; other men who he will eventually get to recognise and know while he?s out and about with DS. But I don?t know any other working mums with SAHDs. Not one. And so I don?t know who to talk to.

So? does anyone a) know of any resources for me or b) want to join me in a general chat about what it feels like and what works and doesn?t work?

OP posts:
Portofino · 20/01/2012 21:27

Imagine that your dh was working and you were at home. Would he be spending his lunch break researching mother and baby groups near you?

Portofino · 20/01/2012 21:24

What is it that you want? People to tell you that you should not feel bad to work? I am happy to do that. Or is it that your dh needs resources to make friends, join groups etc. In which case why on EARTH should you do this for him? He should do it himself.

WoTmania · 20/01/2012 20:46

I can't share my experiences because I'm a SAHM but i ahve a friend who is studying whose DH is a SAHD. SHe finds it enormously frustrating that she gets told she's 'lucky' that he does everything so she can go to uni, that she is 'lucky' he cooks every evening etc. Whe nshe was a SAHM he wasn't told he was 'lucky and she wasn't told how fabulous she was for doing all the childcare/cooking and other day to day jobs so he could go out to work. (her degree will lead dtraight to a job BTW so not as if she's doing it for the sake of the studying).
Mainly we just bitch about it and she vents when she sees a certain circle of friends.