Disney Princesses/Barbie castle. Should I indulge DD or steer her away?

I wouldn't actively steer away.

dd2 has been infected by the Disney Princess bug (and by association, so has dd1 now!) - she is completely and utterly smitten.

however, interestingly, she attended a birthday party this weekend which was a knights/princesses one. and she chose not to wear her Snow White dress - her words were "I can be a princess in trousers'. she was the only girl there not dressed up to the nines (she wore her favourite trousers - red cords - and a t shirt - just normal everyday clothes)

so, while she hankers aftert he whole princess thing, and goes misty eyed whenever she sees merchandise, she does make sane choices too.

if you try to ban it, it will only increase the allure, imo.

I loved my barbies, sindys etc but grew up to be a well adjusted feminist.

You see, Prima?
I was denied Barbies, and grew up to be a maladjusted feminist.

Let the poor child have her pink plastic fun, just make sure you refer to 'Barbara Castle' rather than 'Barbie Towers' or whatever. Then everyone's a winner!

I loved my barbies, sindys etc but grew up to be a well adjusted feminist. I know it wasn't as bad then, but I don't think it's a problem. I was also raised by a really cool feminist mum which I think over rode any other influences!

I'm with vixsatis on this one, and I speak as the daughter of vehemently 'gender neutral' 1970s parents, now (and then, too) well able to see that (a small amount of) plastic princessery isn't the end of the world. Really, gross as pink plastic trashy small girls' toys are, they're not going away any time soon, so it's probably better to indulge it a little, rather than giving it some great status as a forbidden joy.
Just take a tip from Elizabeth I: all things in moderation.

I diverted my DDs towards Groovy Girls, which still allow them to dress dolls etc, but which are better proportioned, and also nicer to cuddle. Website here - groovygirls.com, and they are available in shops and online in the UK.

Yes, I would also have a word with the childminder. Its one thing to provide a load of stuff and let the child choose but its quite another to push the girls towards the princesses and, presumably, push the boys towards the trains etc.

The pros of barbie is she is very versatile and comes with loads of accessories and is great for imaginative play.

The cons of disney princess is it tends to spill over into other areas (like the cash register) and isn't so imaginative. DDs barbies do all sorts, they are chefs and vets and soldiers and they mend their own car and work in the zoo and are pirates but her cinderella doll is just cinderella, she isn't a doctor or a teacher or on holiday in London.

The cons of banning stuff like that is you aren't actually encouraging non gendered play, you are encouraging play with things that are stereotypically neutral or for boys and she may pick up on the idea that things that are 'for girls' are fundamentally without worth. She isn't being brought up in a vacuum, she will see that the boys she knows mainly play with the toys that mummy approves of and the girls play with toys that mummy doesn't like. She should be allowed to like things even if its just because of marketing the way that as adults we go through crazes for whatever is in at the time too.

We've gone along the don't offer but don't refuse route with this, in order to keep it fairly minimal but without making an issue of it. So, we have never bought Disney Princess stuff ourselves unprompted, but we have never asked anyone else not to or said anything negative about them (not in front of DD anyway!). DD has asked for a couple of Princess bits and bobs but not much, so we have let her have those. So far she hasn't asked for anything big, hasn't shown a great deal of interest but knows who they all are and can talk with her friends about them without feeling left out. She's 5.5 and has plenty of other toys she likes. Someone has given her some hand me down Barbies but they haven't been played with much yet. I loved my Sindy dolls when I was younger I don't think it had a long term adverse effect. Bratz do make me shudder though, but we haven't go to that age yet.

If Disney Princesses are not the only options which you give her, then I think it's fine. I think that if we get too rigidly opposed to the pink and pretty we risk denigrating the feminine just because it is feminine; and how sexist is that? There are plenty of reasons why one might find a pirate a less attractive role model than a princess.

Disney generally is ghastly; but she will grow out of it. I had hundreds of dolls and played with them until I was quite old; but it didn't stop me growing up to earn my own living, be a feminist etc

Barbie pales into insignificance next to bratz ... They have I believe dr vet etc barbie which seems probably preferable to something based around preening looks.

Watching with interest as have Same issue with dd .