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Original poster

Am I being a killjoy about this school book?

42 replies

SenseofEntitlement · 09/10/2011 21:24

ARGH. Apoligies for the blog link, but I have put pictures up here

My 4yo DD1 brought home a school library book where the message is explicity that the main aim is to find a man, and that there way to do that is to wear pretty dresses and not be messy.

ARGH.

I need to say something to school. How can I say something without being "that parent"? If it is relevant, me and my husband volunteer a lot with the school - we have each been in to read to the kids4 or 5 times and helped on a school trip, and she only started a few weeks ago, so it isn't like we are just there to criticize.

I realise it is likely the teacher has no idea what is in the book, how do I raise it?

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Original poster
SenseofEntitlement · 13/10/2011 22:03

I did actually used to work as a library assistant, and my MIL is about as qualified as it gets for helping out with a children's library...

Librarianship is actually one of the options I'm looking at for my postgrad, but I'm holding out to see if there are any libraries left first.

That had never actually occured to me - volunteering in the library would not only solve this problem, but it would actually get me more experience towards a possible career...

I'm already trying to involve myself with the pta, who seem to be called the parents forum here, but they all seem to know each other very well, and we are kind of newcomers.

It's not the kind of thing that would be affected by it being a Catholic school is it? (long story - lovely, lovely school, but I wouldn't have chosen a faith school, only it was the only one out of the nearest 8 that offered us a place before the summer holidays so we had to bite the bullet)

OP posts:
madwomanintheattic · 13/10/2011 21:36

could you volunteer to be on the board for the new purchases? offer to give the librarian a hand? volunteer for the pta who are buying them? have they handed over the dosh to the librarian?

Original poster
SenseofEntitlement · 13/10/2011 21:32

Well, I took it to school. The only staff member at the door was the TA, so I showed her the book, flipping through the pages as I briefly explained the plot. She said she will show it to whoever is in charge of the library.

Now what? Do I chase it up?

(I also donated four lovely books that I had hanging around - long story - so that could have possibly helped?)

The thing is, the library is in a pretty dire state, but at the parent's forum it was mentioned that they have several thousand pounds to spend on new books. Obviously we need to make sure the same kind of rubbish isn't bought, but how can I say that without being all "that reception mum with purple hair who isn't even Catholic"?

OP posts:
madwomanintheattic · 13/10/2011 21:03

rofl hully.

and literally tea/ keyboard after 'have at it with a big black marker'

i'm going to be using that for everything now.

Grin and Shock

and i wanna read theclanger's german story.......

Hullygully · 13/10/2011 15:16

That is so moving.

A tale of struggle and redemption, of coming-of-age and accepting and embracing one's destiny with grace and aplomb.

The language is powerful, yet restrained. The imagery both brilliant and apt.

TheSmallClanger · 12/10/2011 23:20

Have only just looked at this. As well as being hideously sexist, it is a boring, crap story, with none of the humour or lovely anarchic twists that all the best children's stories have.

I remember a better version of this type of story in a German textbook many years ago - the prince, or whoever he was, found the princess, who was trying to be polite and ladylike, utterly boring and announced he was going out to work on his motorbike. The princess (or girl, whoever she was) jumped up with enthusiasm and asked if she could help, and it was the start of a beautiful relationship.

buzzskeleton · 12/10/2011 19:02

Awful.

MollyintheMoon · 10/10/2011 23:25

I would definitely ask the teacher to read it. It is beyond awful.

www.pinkstinks.co.uk have managed to stop ELC using the word 'pretty' so much in their catalogue, because as they say 'What does this tell a girl about what she?s worth?'

melpomene · 10/10/2011 23:14

Uggh, how dreadful. It's a bit hard to make out the writing on the back cover, but I think it says the book was first published in 2002 which is incredible since it would be more at home in the 1950s.

Definitely complain, and let us all know how you get on.

seeker · 10/10/2011 13:26

Say something. The teacher will not know this book is in her book box- I bet it was a donation from a parent. She will be as horrified as you are, incredibly apologetic and she'll help you burn it.

This happened to me with a wildly unsuitable book ds brough home in year 1. The writer wrote books for lots of age groups and this was a teenage one that accidentalqly got in the wrong box.

FeelMyWraith · 10/10/2011 13:18

Ha! My friend's dd has this book. DD and I changed the ending to 'Prince Harry was dull as dishwater and so the Princess went and kissed a frog instead. And he didn't even turn into a Prince. But it was better than Prince Dishwater and his backward ideas. The end.'

It's a depressingly awful tale.

OnEdge · 10/10/2011 13:16

Pile of shite ! Bloody irresponsible letting kids read this. I'll go up the school and tell them if you like Grin

wahwahwah · 10/10/2011 13:11

Sorry that year are we in - 1953?

I remember a school book when I was little (in the right-on 1970's) called something like 'Billy has 2 daddys' about a boy with a gay dad and his boyfriend. How times change...

BertieBotts · 10/10/2011 13:08

And. Um. Yeah. What everyone else said!

BertieBotts · 10/10/2011 13:05

Whoever wrote it can't even punctuate correctly either. On the first page: "Unlike most princesses, Poppy was a very messy, little girl" - why is there an erroneous comma between messy and little?? (I mean technically it could be saying that she is both very messy and very little, but I very much doubt this was what the author intended to say. It's just shoddy.)

AnaisB · 10/10/2011 13:01

Wow - I think that's the worst book I've ever seen. I'm guessing the teacher just didn't realise what it was like.

MyBrainIsOutOfTune · 10/10/2011 12:50

That is one awful bookShock

SweetTheSting · 10/10/2011 12:48

Stick an extra handdrawn page in the back 'And then she told the Prince to shove off for being so shallow'??

mrsravelstein · 10/10/2011 12:38

that really is offensive garbage, and i'm not easily offended.

HerdOfTinyElephants · 10/10/2011 12:35

Oh my good grief.

The strange thing is that it starts off so well. I like the picture of the princess climbing the tree. And there are so, so many different directions in which it could have gone (e.g. "dressing comfortably is fine, but if you are so messy that you keep losing stuff you are taking it a bit too far and your parents are probably right that you need to tidy up occasionally" or "on reflection, a clean pair of trousers would probably have been a better choice for a garden party" or "Harry and Poppy went off and played football/cricket/climbed a tree together"). It must have taken real talent to trace unerringly the line of most jaw-dropping offensiveness.

Mind you, croquet is a VICIOUS, ruthless game. They missed a trick there on their quest to make the New Poppy as simpering and bland as possible.

savoycabbage · 10/10/2011 12:35

God it's hideous! I can hardly believe my eyes. I would definitely have something to day about it.

MoChan · 10/10/2011 12:28

OMG I would be FUMING. There's no way I wouldn't (politely) ask for it to be removed from the school library.

giyadas · 10/10/2011 12:16

I like MrsFogi's thinking. Have at it with a big black marker, and innocently return it as normal Grin
or one of the more adult suggestions above

Original poster
SenseofEntitlement · 10/10/2011 12:13

I used to be an Usborne rep, and had to quit suddenly because of my health, so I still have quite a few brand new books hanging around the house - I can easily go in with a pile of new books that aren't offensive. I was a bit worried I was over reacting, as I do tend to be a bit Guardian reading/feminist/mumsnetty (as in the stereotypes) and so maybe my view of what is normal is a bit left of centre...

Good to hear that I'm not being daft :)

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Tchootnika · 10/10/2011 11:02

That's just what I was thinking, Himalaya...
It looks like an unwanted book (I wonder why?!) that found it's way into the library and was lef there as 'harmless girly stuff' (or something)... Is there one in every class room bookshelf? There seems to be, but actually getting rid of this stuff if you can rather than 'tactfully' ignoring it is definitely the right thing, Sense.