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Original poster

Calling a woman "sir"

30 replies

skrumle · 03/10/2011 18:04

this is totally daft but i've been watching the new season of Castle and in the first episode a new female captain appears. when the (female) lead detective goes in to introduce herself she calls the captain "ma'am" and is told to either call her "captain" or "sir". for the rest of that episode and the next she calls the captain "sir".

it REALLY jarred with me - i think on the basis that sir is gendered and i don't see why a woman would/should choose to be addressed in a way that suggests she is a man. is anyone american, is there a difference in the level of respect that ma'am would get as opposed to sir??

OP posts:
madwomanintheattic · 03/10/2011 18:28

quite, mrs s. Grin
it makes you crazy. (but lol at it happening the other way round Grin)

SauvignonBlanche · 03/10/2011 18:26

I had a teacher who preferred to be called "Sir", she went mental if you called her "Miss".

MrsSnaplegs · 03/10/2011 18:24

I know of no serving officer in uk armed forces who would settle with being called sir except in error via email.
I have called a fairly senior male army officer ma'am as I thought he was female - hadn't met him and he had a name I wrongly assumed was female Grin

madwomanintheattic · 03/10/2011 18:20
madwomanintheattic · 03/10/2011 18:19

what a load of utter bollocks. i didn't see the episode, obv, but i'd be interested to know what the subtext was - were they portraying the new captain as a bit bonkers? or actually making an attempt to look at gender and power?

fwiw, i got addressed a lot as sir when it was unclear what my gender was, (with the assumption i must be a man becasue of my rank) but it was quickly corrected to ma'am, with no depreciation in the level of respect as an address. and actually, i'd say insisting on being called sir even though you are a woman is reinforcing that stereotype, rather than demolishing gender boundaries...

'ma'am' or 'captain'. not sir. that's just daft.

am fabulously curious to know more though. and in rl i can see that if any of my (female) colleagues had made this leap i would have been desperate to discuss it with them.

might have to find it on the ctv pages and watch it!