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Original poster

Is it easier to combine a career and motherhood if you are a younger Mum?

127 replies

margerykemp · 25/09/2011 15:57

Years ago I read hunger which basically said that if you want both a high powered career and to be a mother then your best chance is to have your first child before you are 26.

That's what I did and a decade on it's still to early to see how my long term career will compare to my contemporaries who start families in their late 30's.

As a feminist I dont know what advice I'd give to younger women/DD.

Anecdotally younger Mums I know seem to have more energy/drive to go back to work and have partners who are more 'hands on' Dads than men 20 years older but they seem to lose out in terms of relationships (more frequently left as single mums) and have to suffer the stigma from society of being a 'young' Mum- and I'm talking about women in their 20's not teenagers.

OP posts:
stripeybump · 25/09/2011 16:05

Very few women in their twenties can afford to have children unless they have significant help from their parents or a high earning partner. Society judges you on your career and financial stability - especially now that there is so much increased competition for every job. The best bet for most women is still to build up their career in their twenties and have kids at 30 or thereabouts, and fire straight back to work asap (if that's what they want)

The main barrier is obviously how the working world is so male-orientated, you pretty much have to pretend to be male to be successful.

WilsonFrickett · 25/09/2011 16:02

I think for my age group (40s) a lot of people don't really 'start' their career until they were well into their twenties. By the time they finish college/uni, bum about a bit, have a couple of 'starter' jobs - that all takes time. Certainly I didn't have a 'proper' job till I was 28/29 so obviously I could have had DCs in that time as well (not sure how I would have paid for them at that point, but that's another story!).

I wonder if the recession will have any impact on this though? Are young people starting out now thinking 'crikey, better get on the career ladder right away' or are they thinking 'no point stressing about it as it's so unstable anyway'?

For me, being established in my career before having DS meant I was at a level where the organisation wanted to keep me - I was an important asset to them, so was able to negotiate the right deal for me on my return for mat leave, I then quickly moved to a job-share. Not sure if that would have happened ten years before, as I would have been entirely expendable.