Deleted threads

Parp

Thank you sweet. You see bob, I am trying to defend you and there are people who can recognize what I am doing. I don't see where it gets you to insist on insulting the people who are on your side in this. You just need to compromise, and learn to take a joke, honestly mate.

No, Bob, I did not say you would be attacked because you are a man, I said you are posting from a different place. I did not say your views would not be listened to. I did not say that your opinions wouldn't matter. Men who wish to engage with a feminist board will have their views and opinions challenged, much as I would expect anyone's to be challenged.

It's just that when you make a statement that comes across as entitled on a feminist board when you claim to want to support women, the least you can expect is a reminder that entitlement is not welcome.

Please don?t twist people?s words whilst complaining that people are twisting yours.

"At last the truth is admitted, I and any man who choses to post here must accept being personally attacked, because we're men."

And the other men who aren't personally attacked because they're men?

Does my bum look big in this?

LRD, you rock.

I think i'm going to make some flameshields for that treehouse

And it is not because you are men.

Sigh.

It is because you don't listen and act dudely - lots of men do it but not all men.

If you hear it from a man will it suddenly stop being in lady brain code?

Do lots of women regularly visit MRA sites and repeatedly tell them where they are going wrong?

Pan!

DON'T DO IT BOB. DON'T DO IT TO ME AGAIN. I CAN'T TAKE IT

Bob, my post was in no way a personal attack. It was entirely within the posting guidelines. I am pretty offended you would say that (though by now after all your overreactions I should not be surprised).

No Bob it is not worthless twaddle.

It is chapter one, page one, line number 1 in "Feminism For Men 101". Subtitled; "We know that patriarchy has taught you all your life that you are the most important person in a roomfull of women but I'm afraid you will have to lay aside that piece of entitled bullshit if you want feminist women to have any time for you - oh and you don't get many chances so you better pick this up quickly because feminists are the women who are sick of being talked down to so they're pretty perceptive and non-compromising when it comes to men acting dudely. In fact is pisses them right royally off so much that if you do it more than once they tend to class you as an entitled dick and not want to have much to do with you".

HTH

Bob, I think you are seeing things that are not really there in my posts. It was a perfectly acceptable comment many other posts would have found funny and friendly. I am sorry your situation is such that you cannot see this, but there is a limit to how much support I can give you if you insist on being so extreme about it.

We love you really Bob.

Now why don't you stop taking this all so personally, turn off the computer and enjoy the beautiful sunshine? You can come back to Mumsnet this evening all refreshed and energised.

It wouldn't get you banned Bob.

Have you not noticed Edd?

He hasn't been banned and he's been, ooh, much worse than LRD.

Are you going to address the fact that Adela, Pan et al are not jeered at because they are men?

Do you think it may be something in your tone or content, that causes feminists to jeer at you? Not just because you are a man?

I do not want to condone any sort of criticism of bob. He is obviously very upset. It isn't easy to feel rational when you are struggling with emotional issues and I am very sorry my joke could not be taken in the spirit it was meant.

However, bob, I really feel that it's not a very rounded debate to want to restrict other posters from innocent comments and jokes. I am trying to understand and help but you are not making it easy for me - and I am on your side here.

I already told Bobbanana that gaslighting doesn't work on me.

Calling me a liar is a personal attack and something he has done numerous times here now.

Christ are we going to have to have stickys at the top of threads in the feminist section warning that they may be triggering due to the behaviour of some the male posters???!!!

Oh the irony.

I love this board, this is the only feminist board I post on because I have never been made to feel stupid for my views, yet this seems to be the only board where I have seen so much hate thrown at others. Stupid posts get out of hand and escalate into full-blown arguments.

I hate getting into the middle of things but Bob your ?No I assure you it's impossible, I'm a geek.? did come across as a bit entitled and sadly LRD?s comment offended you. Did those 2 posts really require 7 pages of hate?

Sadly Bob, your gender will always be an issue; you?re on a feminist board. Without patriarchy there would be no need for these boards and however enlightened you become, your opinions and experiences don?t come from the same place as the female members. I don?t mean that in a nasty way, it?s just a fact: You are a man; your experiences will be different.

I do wonder how long it will be before this thread gets deleted.

Yay, Bob, you are back.

You need to stop playing with our emotions and make a proper commitment to us.

bob, that is a very aggressive post. I have told you how I meant my joke as a friendly gesture. I think you are having problems accepting that it is not always about the issues you are so hung up on. I had no idea you had been through such bad experiences, but I assure you, I had no intention to make you feel like a victim again. I abhor that idea and have myself often been in situations where I was hurt by other people's well-meaning comments, so I know exactly what it feels like. I feel I know enough about it to say, you must examine your own responses and reactions. This emotional upset and anger is ultimately only going to make you feel worse, and it detracts from what you want to say. There are people who can help.

Hey Bob you still here?

You haven't addressed the points that feminists have made about Pan,Adela etc. - all those men who aren't "lashed out at" because of their gender.

With reference to Beachcomber's post, would you like to think about that?

Thought not.

THANK FUCK YOU'RE BACK BOB.

Please stop threatening to leave, it's so painful for me.