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Original poster

Help me explain to my friend why this is really wrong

187 replies

iMemoo · 25/06/2011 19:24

A group of women in my town are organising an event to raise money for charity. They are holding a bikini car wash! Hmm So basically people (I suspect mainly men) are going to pay them to wash their car whilst they are dressed in skimpy bikinis. My friend is taking part in it. I am horrified by the whole thing. I can't believe that this group of woman are choosing to objectify themselves like this. There are a million things they could have done to raise money and yet they choose to do it by basically getting their tits out for the lads!! I have tried to explain why it is wrong to my friend but I'm just not getting through to her.

I know in my head what I think and why this is wrong but I just can't articulate it. How do I explain to my friend why this is so wrong. Please help me find the right words!

OP posts:
MrsRhettButler · 26/06/2011 00:52

Cab to write an essay but I agree with SGB

DumSpiroSpero · 26/06/2011 00:47

But surely these women are choosing to dress in bikinis and wash cars for what they consider to be a good cause and men are paying for the priviledge.

If you don't like it OP, that's fair enough but I would say you need to let your mate get on with it or risk losing a friend.

Besides blokes do it too!

SpeedyGonzalez · 26/06/2011 00:42

It all sounds very Pirelli Calendar. Not at all about objectifying women, is it?

SinicalSal · 26/06/2011 00:31

Missing the point somewhat, SGB.

AwesomePan · 26/06/2011 00:20

and will be missing the Olympics beach volleyball at Horseshit's Parade.

AwesomePan · 26/06/2011 00:19

i don't think it's the bikini-wearing in itself that is being met with hostility. When on the beach women generally don't line up involving themsleves in physical exercise whilst men pay money to do a bit of leering.

or maybe I go to the stuffy beaches....

MollysChamber · 26/06/2011 00:16

God how bloody tacky. Yuck.

kayah · 26/06/2011 00:09

but would guys pay for the same car wash to the same ladies it if they wore long robes?

SpringchickenGoldBrass · 26/06/2011 00:07

What is making me feel uneasy is the hostility to women wearing bikinis. They are not running around with their labia out or having a mass charitable cocksuck. Women wear bikinis on the beach, in the park and in their back gardens. This sounds like 'seaside postcard' safe bawdiness, not Anal Gangbang for Cancer Research.

NorksAreMessy · 25/06/2011 23:44

I didn't thnk anything about this could make me feel more uneasy, but 'in memory of' has done it.
Nasty nasty nasty

SinicalSal · 25/06/2011 23:29

'Bikini Carwash and Family Fun Day'

FFS

forkful · 25/06/2011 23:24

Perhaps this will put her off?

I suspect the charity is very small/unregistered?

dittany · 25/06/2011 23:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorksAreMessy · 25/06/2011 23:10

The more I think about it, the nastier it is...like a sort of first scene for a live-action porno.
What are these women THINKING?

LadyOfTheFlowers · 25/06/2011 23:08

Sadly no. Wink

kayah · 25/06/2011 23:08

I wonder if the charity they are trying to support is going to be thrilled by it?

forkful · 25/06/2011 23:06

SGB -I don't know - it's a guess. I think OP would have mentioned it. As with so many of these things it's normally men ogling women. I think such an event encourages street harassment and a culture where women are judged on their looks rather than eg their car cleaning ability Grin

NorksAreMessy · 25/06/2011 23:06

Are they dressed in their underpants,lady?

LadyOfTheFlowers · 25/06/2011 23:04

I always go for a 'hose down' when the firemen do charity carwashes - is that okay? :o

HerBeX · 25/06/2011 23:01

Yes tell us what charity it is so that I can not donate to them in future.

NorksAreMessy · 25/06/2011 22:59

Ick!

But you have said your piece, she hasn't changed her mind. This is nasty, but you are better going after the charity, that her, IMHO. What sort of charity thinks this is a good idea?

HerBeX · 25/06/2011 22:54

I wouldn't donate to a charity which accepted this sort of shit. How can accepting money from this sort of event, be consistent with an equal ops policy?

SpringchickenGoldBrass · 25/06/2011 22:51

Forkful, how do you know there aren't?

forkful · 25/06/2011 22:49

I suggest the charity they are raising £ for checks it's equality policy. If they don't have one perhaps they had better get one. Also branding image for the charity. This type of event is likely to jar with that. Why aren't there going to be blokes in Speedos cleaning cats for the laydeez to look at?!

HerBeX · 25/06/2011 22:29

I think you've made your point and you can't do anything else.

Just refuse to sponsor her though.

I suspect she might regret it actually. It's one thing to think it's all a bit of a larf, it will be very different when the creepy guy from up the road comes leering up to her making sure that he gets a good look at her and then afterwards makes continual remarks about her breasts/ bum etc. when he meets her out shopping in the supermarket. If you feel like you really can't let it go and only if she raises the subject again, it might be worth pointing out to her that when she undertakes to do this, she's not just agreeing to wash the cars of sexy young guys with fab abs, whose admiring attention she'll welcome, she's also agreeing to have Mr Creepy from nr 14 ogling her - she may well not have thought of how that will make her feel.