Mothers, fathers, children and the family heirarchy

I don't see anything in Sakura's posts that violently disagree with what OrmIrian has posted.

I doubt if she is feeding her daughter statistics. Probably some kind of Japanese food I should think.

Maybe my mistake was not understanding your OP -it was a thread about a thread and I have no idea which thread it was about! I also lost track of the question!

No-people have got me wrong.I am accused of not listening or not understanding, and yet people are failing to understand my posts.

I can't see anything wrong with your post, if I had a DD I could have written it myself.

1. You know perfectly decent men and you like them.
2. You expect your DSs to be decent men who don't exploit women.

There is nothing to argue about. It give balance. You are not feeding your DD scary statistics to say that she shouldn't go down the marriage route if she wants to-merely that there are different ways of looking at it.

I haven't found the balance elsewhere.

Sorry-I can see that you won't actually want to be approved of by me. but an excellent post.

I would agree with all of that Ormirian-that seems fair and well balanced.

Exactly-it is quite possible to live with men in a non romanitic relationship.
My cousin went off to live in a remote part of the world for a year, she was doing scientific research, so remote the vet had to learn emergency procedures for appendix etc as they were too far from medical assistance. She was one of two women in a team of men. She was quite safe.
Are you really saying that women can sleep in the same building as men but they are only in danger if they move from platonic to romantic?

That wasn't actually the question I asked. I would be happy for my DSs to go backpacking around Australia-they speak English, the culture is similar and I have relatives over there who would be nearer than me in an emergency. (I wouldn't be so keen if they went into the Outback)

I asked if you would be happy if she went off alone on an overland trip to Australia. I wouldn't stop my DSs (I couldn't if they were adults and had the money) but I wouldn't LOVE them to go. The thought of them alone in the Far East etc is scary and I can see me getting very worried if they didn't get in contact and I hadn't heard from them for a few days. I have friends whose DCs have done this-and South America and they were all very relieved when they got home-I don't recall anyone loving it.

You didn't answer university and student accommodation.

You are far more likely to be killed in a car crash than by a partner-people still go in cars.

Yes I do believe in the patriarchy to a certain extent. You can't get rid of thousands of years of history in one fell swoop. It takes time. Society is made up of individuals, everyone needs to do their bit, to add to the whole.

I would absolutely LOVE it if my daughter wanted to go backpacking around Oz

"How would that work? Like a snailshell?"

Bahahahahaha

blackcurrants
She's not going to answer your questions, she's going to answer questions you haven't asked.

I'm sooo confused, exoticfruits.
I look from my playing baby son, to my sleeping husband (am about to make him Father's Day Pancakes!) and think: Oh god, I hate them. I mean, I didnt know that I hated them, but it appears I do, because I've read the same crime statistics that sakura has, and I rather think she's right.

And that, apparently, makes me a man hater who doesn't have real emotional involvement with men.

Oh no, wait, it doesn't. It's absolute bollocks.

You haven't responded to my earlier question. Do you even think the Patriarchy exists?

LOL exoticfruits I can now give up giving you the benefit of the doubt in case you are genuinely trying to engage with the arguments but just a bit thick.

When Sakura quotes the transsexual crime figures, that's not paranoia, those figures are real.

Do you understand that acknowledging crime figures, doesn't imply anything about someone's psychological disposition?

Whereas continually pretending that people have made arguments they haven't, setting up Aunt Sallys in order to knock them down... um... does.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

Please highlight where someone has been rude to you exoticfruits and not just disagreed with what you said.

To answer your question, and based on what sakura has actually said, I think she'd be perfectly happy with that scenario.

Well if she's backpacking over Australia she is NOT living with a man and therefore will be statistically safer, so I think Sakura won't have a problem with it at all TBH.

I see that it is perfectly OK to be rude to me!

I still would like to know if she would wave her DD off happily on an overland trip to Austrailia, alone? My niece did it-and came back in one piece and is happily living alone. I just wondered how much freedom is expected, as an alternative to living with a man.

Read the post! If she takes her mother seriously and won't live with a man and goes around the world instead.

My mother reads the Daily Mail and concludes that elderly women can't go out after 6pm! It preys on fears.

She hasn't got a crime-she needs counselling.

A question for Sakura. If your DD listens and takes it all seriously as a lesson for life-how will she cope with university , if she wants to go? Bearing in mind that Halls of Residence are all mixed these days? Or would she have to live at home, or find lodgings with a woman who promises never to have male family staying? What if she wants to be a strong independent woman and backpack overland to Australia alone? Will you wave her off happily? Or will your fears stop that too?

Your comments to sakura are very personal and rude exoticfruits.

I'm not sure why when her only 'crime' is to hold views you disagree with.

Sometimes I think I have strayed into a parallel universe! I will go and do a bit of peaceful gardening instead.
I would suggest that you don't read the Daily Mail.