How do we raise our sons to treat girls and women respectfully...?

I'd agree that you start by setting a good example round within your own household, relationships etc. And then as they pick up things from outside - repeating what someone said at nursery, coming out with stereotypes - you challenge those and discuss the issues. Obviously how you do that when your 4yo says "girls can't be racing drivers/astronauts/doctors" is different from when your 13yo says "I don't want to continue doing physics because all my friends say its a boys subject", or if they comment negatively about someone on TV because of their clothing.

It can feel like you're climbing a mountain, but if you challenge things and get them to think about why people have picked up on stereotypes, then hopefully they will apply a bit more thought than otherwise.

By the time they reach teens, you'd maybe want to talk about why the girls in those pop videos feel they have to dress and behave a certain way to be successful, and why real life girls copy them, and how that doesn't mean they are any less deserving of respect.

It's really important for our boys to see our DPs treating us with respect, as well.

Agree - start with ourselves.

My boys don't see me doing all the housework for a start! They see their dad doing just as much as me. Their father is as fully involved with raising them as I am. Hands on. There's no such thing as women's work in THIS house!

I have actually banned the music channels. I feel very strongly that music videos are horrible things these days, with fully clothed men lording it over half naked women thrusting their gentials forward. Who's got the power there is so clear to see! I think those videos give a warped view of women.

I teach respect for other people (male and female), to consider other people's feelings and to be courteous. To treat everyone equally.

My eldest son was doing a project about the suffragettes recently, and we sat down and went through it. He was horrified by the way women have been treated. so I have clearly done something right

We start with ourselves. The level of respect we demand as mothers, the examples we set, the qualities we champion, the behaviour we fail to tolerate, the language we use... will be how our sons think women are. However, I think we should not be hypocritical. In the same way as we all judge people (men as well as women) by various criteria, we should also be aware that,we can't realistically expect our children never to judge or make comparisons.

Isn't there a thread currently running about raising boys and starting the idea of a book club on the subject in the feminist section?