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Original poster

A lot of things annoyed me yesterday. Here is my list.

91 replies

EllieG · 24/04/2011 20:47

  1. DD got given a barbie for her birthday. It was a doctor (as a nod to me as I often rail against them). She was a paediatrician with lolipops in her pocket, pink high heels and a sparkly white coat. DD complained that she doesn't stand up because her feet are too small.
  1. Went out for tea with female friends. Got mocked for about 15 mins as I said 'oh, I joined this thing called UK feminista today'. Best mate told me in so many words that I was boring and worthy and blah blah for my 'new obsession' about feminism and that it was just my latest cause and it was stupid. She asked how I personally felt oppressed - I said I didn't much but other women do and that is why I am a feminist. She asked me to state how and I said well um, how about the tiny percentage for conviction for rape cases, I was laughed at for being boring (in so many words)
  1. Best mate went on to say that she thinks about '70 per cent of women are stupid and boring' and that she thinks she gets on better with men.
  1. Friends moved on to talk about other friend's job as zoo keeper and managed to have long and serious discussion about issues to do with dogs. Dogs, ffs.
  1. Now I was laughing throughout this, I know I was being ribbed and my friends are all very empowered and strong women who laugh at many taboo subjects and are actually very feminist, but I am getting slightly pissed off about having to pretend I don't care. I need some feminists where I live......
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Original poster
EllieG · 30/04/2011 20:00

Quite right, they all like that nonsense really, irrespective of gender, it's just people who tell boys that they are not supposed to.

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SybilBeddows · 30/04/2011 09:54

Ellie the other week I went to my nephew's party - my sensible SIL had put edible jewellery kits in all the party bags, regardless of their pinkness, knowing full well that ALL 5 YEAR OLDS would like them.

HerBEggs · 29/04/2011 22:40

Oh god my DD had about 6 of them all together.

None of whcih I bought I hasten to add - all birthday presents or inherited from friends.

She is now going through a backlash though - she's 9. She doesn't want girlie stuf anymore, I think it's an distancing mechanism from being a younger girl. She now wants to be considered older and cooler than little girl obsessed with princesses.

Original poster
EllieG · 29/04/2011 21:41

Seriously - she has 3 now - complete with wings and everything - you can have one if you want it - I can post to you no prob

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SardineQueen · 29/04/2011 21:24

lend sorry missed a word out!

SardineQueen · 29/04/2011 21:23

Ellie maybe you should one of the dresses to my DD Grin

I'm buggered if I'm buying one of the buggering things!

Original poster
EllieG · 29/04/2011 21:15

Yes, it's not a hey-everyone-let's-debate thread, it's a just a little thread tucked away in the corner minding it's own business. Had I wanted a free for all, I would have posted on chat or AIBU. Ah well.

I like that about the Beastie Boys - good on them.

I have another thing to add to my list of things that annoyed me

  1. DD got a late birthday present. It was a pink fairy princess outfit. That is her third one now. She loves it (of course) but I wish people would not just assume that's the only dress up to get a girl. I'm going to buy her a tiger outfit I think.
  1. DD went to party. All girls party bags were peppa pig with pink necklaces in them. All boys got Ben 10 and contained cars. I was the only one who said (mildly, I don't like to be rude) 'Isn't it funny the way they gravitate towards the stuff geared towards boys/girls'. All women said, yes, must be something inbuilt. I sighed a little inside and said um don't you think it might be because we encourage it? They said oh no my DD has always loved pink/my DS has always hated dolls it must be a natural thing etc etc. Stupid.
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SardineQueen · 29/04/2011 19:55

Does anyone know if when people on the Ethical Living threads are having a nice chat about compost and getting by without a car, they get Jeremy Clarkson types coming on and haranguing them?

Just wondering.

Missingfriendsandsad · 29/04/2011 19:04

Do some research on the controllers of TV channels though - many are/have been women.

StatelyPoshBeartrothal · 29/04/2011 14:32

The video was odd - didn;t it end up being a woman?

And good for the beastie boys - I had no idea about all that :o

HerBEggs · 29/04/2011 14:15

These stupid trolls never notice who runs the TV schedules and who the senior managers in charge of TV stations are do they.

A clue: they generally don't have wombs.

InmaculadaConcepcion · 29/04/2011 09:44

I'm now playing with the idea of starting a thread so people here can rewrite sexist lyrics so they would be more pleasing to those of a feminist persuasion....

Could be fun!

InmaculadaConcepcion · 29/04/2011 09:43

"You've got to fight
For your right
For parity"

(my own suggestion)

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/04/2011 09:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoffinMum · 29/04/2011 08:35

I was told recently that I was only a lecturer in education because I was a mum and therefore would naturally be interested in it.

This was a senior lecturer in social psychology at an elite university Otherwise incredibly politically correct.

Believe me ladies, discrimination is out there, and it's real.

Original poster
EllieG · 29/04/2011 08:27

No, I didn't hear anything either.

Little note - feminism is about equal rights for everybody, men included (or it is as far as I see it). And our rants (on a thread that is not, after all, a major debate thread but a light-hearted discussion of the things that annoyed us personally that particular day) are based on things that we feel devalues men and women. I do not object to wearing pink, I like looking pretty, but I do object to my DD having a particular ideas about her gender assigned to her by her attendance at nursery school, at the age of 3. I do not object to being nice to people who have done a hard day's work, but I do object to assuming that is automatically a man. I absolutely agree that people who make up false complaints about aggression are wrong, because it devalues it when people who are really oppressed speak out bravely. I do however think that society in general values aggressive traits in men, and that this serves neither men or women well.

Now am not going to say anything else about this and get back to chuntering about things that annoyed me. See above.

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StewieGriffinsMom · 29/04/2011 07:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

InmaculadaConcepcion · 29/04/2011 06:41

I thought I heard a funny noise for a moment, but I think I was imagining things. Silly me.

dadsgetshitaswell · 29/04/2011 05:08

just a thought for all you "opressed" people. is there a television programme around in the morning some time where women can abuse men oh! yes I think there is ! well if you want fucking equality we should be allowed to abuse you on a daily abasis as well....oh no we are not allowed to do that are we' even the PM gets pulled up for a casual remark ...oh my god he said calm down dear so what? you silly silly peolple... we should have our own programme with men sitting around talking about our wives and how stupid they are like you do ...oh I forgot thats not allowed in your new nazi state

dadsgetshitaswell · 29/04/2011 01:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

PiousPrat · 28/04/2011 23:51

I think he saw the nostrils flaring which he knows is a sign that I am about to Start A Tirade so thoughtfully threw himself on the grenade and diffused it Grin

I would go a step further and say it isn't co-parenting, it is just parenting. Parent isn't a gender specific word, it just applies to someone who has the responsibility of raising a child. It is our patriarchal society that dictates that 'parent' equates to 'mother' and for the father to be doing it, it needs a special name to give prominence to just how 'well trained' he is, rather like 'male nurse' or 'male nanny'. Men should reclaim the word parent to apply equally to them. Or something.

Please rearrange the above paragraph until it makes coherent sense.

Haha EllieG Good that your friend admitted she was being a bit of a knob. Now to stealthily convert her and bring her to the dark side of feminism ¬_¬

Missingfriendsandsad · 28/04/2011 23:50

God! I think some of you are actually crazy! Why should being nice to a man working physically be such an expression of weakness? Do you really think feminism is about being completely unsupportive as a human being!- I think its amazing that it is still seen as feminst to resist things that women do like like nice dresses and prettiness - I don't see that as at all incompatible with intellectual sharpness or grit or ability - I think it would be areal shame if the strides we have made that allow fully made up women to alsop be throught of as serious - it used to be you had to thatcher-up or clarie short/ ann widdecomb-up to be seen as serious, now you can be pretty without being thought of as a daft tart by men, but it seems some feminists want to insist that pretty = daft tart and that's awful.

As regards the 'aggressive' tag, I work in a very female HR department, and I have to listen to collegues who call every passionate man aggressive and abusive even for just disagreeing with them - some have even raised formal complaints when they have been rightly pulled up for cocking up, and we have had to go through a stupid dance investigating a male employee for being abusive and sexually discriminating when he has said nothing stronger than 'you really have to get on top of this' to a female member of staff who has lost important documents, so its not all one way at all.

as for girls, I think they have more freedom than boys as children - tomboy is quite a positive thing to be in comparison to sissy.

lol at the 'big man' comment- but then I do get huffy if I walk over to my DH and pals and there is no response unless I actively interrupt..:)

Original poster
EllieG · 28/04/2011 23:20

Oo meant to say - went out with friend who laughed muchly at me last week this evening for a cuppa. She was moaning about some people she knew who she said are disrespectful and rude and don't allow others to have different opinions and how she felt it was bad of them to laugh at her about something she held dearly. I said 'um, like maybe something like my interest in feminism?'. She did have to concede the point and said, it's a fair cop, I will try not to be an arse in future. So that's good.

I have no rants today (most unlike me). PiousPrat, I will take yours though, because they sounded very irritating.

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Original poster
EllieG · 28/04/2011 23:16

Yes, I had an image of your DP having to jump in to stop it going everywhere...

The 'babysitting' thing gets me goat too. It's not babysitting it's co-parenting, idiots.

Well done your DS though PiousPrat! What a star Grin

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InmaculadaConcepcion · 28/04/2011 20:38

Thanks for the little bit of gendered colour history, PP, very interesting.

I had to LOL at the image of your piss boiling....not surprised why, though...