All domestic abuse deaths to be reviewed

That's horrendous, fuzzywuzzy

I think laws with regards DV, need to be thoroughly overhauled.

My children have contact with their father thro a contact centre, and the women who use the contact centre have all suffered from DV, I'm inclined to believe them as most are still terrified of their ex with no idea how to deal with the courts.

The ex's continue their abuse even at the contact centre.

The problems with DV and getting away from an perpetrator do not go away with just leaving the partner.

In my experience the partners tend to continue the abuse thro the children, by demanding unsupervised contact and treating the child badly or threatening to refuse to return the child/ren.
And CAFCASS are really really bad at handling the cases, which is terriying as a CAFCASS report is taken very seriously in court.

Also the women all end up suffeirng huge financial loss, as the abusive partners have run up debts in joint names, and against the properties in which they lived, as the women tend to be law abiding and trying to rebuild their lives the banks then chase them for the debts, which can be crippling, whereas the ex's declare themselves unemployed and too poor to repay debts or they just disappear on paper, making it difficult for banks to chase them.

I actually know one woman who fled to a womans refuge with her little baby to get away from her violent drug addict alcoholic boyfriend, when she finally got back on her feet and got a job and her own place, the banks found her and demanded repayment for the huge debts racked up aginst the former house she had shared wih her ex 9and left), she had to declare herself bankrupt in the end, it was horrible, and her ex has now got overnight contact wih their child, altho he has failed all drug tests ordered by the courts.
The ex was terrifying, he'd turn up to the contact centre less than sober and very very agressive, he'd square up to the centre staff and scream into my friends face terrifying their little son.
I actually witnessed this repeatedly, it was horrendous.

She's a strong lady tho, all kudos to her.

I wish more women didn't have to die to provide this information though :( But at least it's better than doing nothing.

Honestly anything to increase the general knowledge about DV, and debunk myths, is a good move. It's shocking how much misunderstanding there is about it, and what's frustrating is those who have been through it, those who work with people who have (although misunderstandings pervade there as well - if they really listen, and see what is happening) can see the connections, the patterns, it's so clear. There is a wealth of information even just somewhere like mumsnet. I expect if someone cared to trawl through the archive of posts which mention DV they would find patterns just from people seeking support on a talk board!

I think these investigation could be a fantastic and very very valuable first step into understanding how DV escalates. I'd love to get involved in something like this, preventing it by seeing the patterns. Maybe when I graduate

This could mean some effective action to prevent predictabl future violence might be taken and then where will we be?

Gosh, that is sad.

Good to hear that they are teaching the children, but at the same time sad. And since there are young girls being beaten up by their partners, obviously it is not enough to prevent them getting involved with violent men.

It usually is :(

Well heres the catch she battered the alkie as a child (her dad was violent)
a generational pattern

Cheers, but she doesn't see it the same way I do. Yes, they're the same generation so it's likely the mother was more embarrassed about the recognition than angry at the beating. Mad, but there you go.

sorry about your mum.

his mother is like 70/80's

What age is the mother, Sue? My mum - much battered in her marriage - maintains it's far worse to be hit in public than in private "because of the shame". Gah. I just wondered if the alkie's mum similarly feels ashamed ... of being seen to be beaten :(

I heard this on e the new this morning its good but needs to be done before the death.

that is awful Unrulysun, i hope she leaves denial is a huge thing I've noticed.

my neighbour is a violent alchoholic one year he got so drunk he battered his own mother in the front street around the rockery and my mum phoned the police because he new his crippled wife would be next.
now his mother hates my mum and says his wife shouldn't speak to her.

I'm so happy to read about this review.

Unruly - that's just horrific.

Christ Unruly, that is appalling.

There is DV education in English schools now, MSL :) Sure someone will be along with the details in a minnit!

Bloody hell, Unrulysun. How awful.

I think that the review is great.

Does anyone know if there is any kind of education at school on domestic abuse? I was thinking of this recently.

I sometimes think that we should get some of the MNetters who have escaped abusive and controlling men to talk to young girls and tell them the warning signs, so that they don't get involved with these wankers.

Jeez Unrulysun

Hah! They should bring back that law where spouses aren't allowed to testify for each other!

She ran around for months trying to get them to drop charges, contacting his lawyers to speak for him etc etc. Basically he would never do this, he would never hurt a fly, it was the drink (he's an alcoholic). She would like us all to welcome him back into our lives :(

OMG, Unrulysun. And she testified for him? Heck.

Nice to hear some good news, AR, thanks! Hope it gains momentum :)

And actually the betrayal of trust is so much greater.

This happens to someone I am very close to :( he poured lighter fluid on her and set fire to her last year :( he got two years suspended and she testified for him :( they're still together :( :( :(