Resisteing feminity 2

I don't see skirts and dresses as being forced upon us. I prefer skirts in the heat. We had a heatwave with temps of 42 degrees last summer, and long skirts were much more comfortable than trousers. Even with suncream on, shorts/ short skirts are uncomfy when it gets really hot - you get a prickly feeling on your skin. Light, loose, flowy skirts are best! And my lovely collection of hats, of course.

But I doubt I would ever bat an eyelid at another woman at work with bare legs, so not quite sure why I feel the need to wear them even occasionally!

alexpolismum - i wear opaques with dresses in winter to keep my legs warm. but even for work i wear bare legs and sandals in summer most of the time. Only occasionally will i wear natural colour sheer tights - usually in a work situation where i need to be really smart. I find them so uncomfortable and sweaty that i don't bother otherwise. And tbh, I find hairy legs look better au naturel than squished into sheer tights :) But yes, I do wear them when I think I need to be smart. But only work, not for private social events though, like this weekend's wedding where I went bare hair and tight less legged.

While we're on clothing, a question from me: do people tend to see skirts and dresses as 'feminine' in the sense of being forced upon us? Only, I find dresses so much more comfortable than trousers as there are no waistbands or belts needed to keep them up so they are much comfier. I lived in wrap dresses when pregnant. So for me, they are a practical solution for comfort but I wonder whether I'm seen as reinforcing 'the rules' for other women.

Oh, I see. I associated it with the nice restaurant!

genuine question - is it generally seen as necessary to wear tights to be smart? Have I missed something here?

I don't even own any tights. I prefer socks in the winter and bare feet with sandals in the summer. On formal occasions when I wear a trouser suit am I supposed to have tights? I just wear socks of an appropriate colour.

that's interesting Tortilla. Glad you enjoyed the wedding blowdry

I'm going to a nice restaurant with dh in a week or two, not sure I dare to not wear tights.

So I shaved my legs for the wedding... I also went to the hairdressers for a blow dry on my unruly mop and - shhh, don't tell anyone - it was relaxing and my hair felt really nice and bouncy and shiny. I even wore mascara and lipstick. Am I inadvertently turning into a dolly bird?

I was thinking about it very consciously as I did each of these things. The thing is, for me, it is nice to do this as part of getting ready for a special event - I don't get out much with two small children so getting ready adds to the build up and excitement of a lovely social event in some way. But I hate the idea that most? some people think I should be performing these frankly bizarre and time-consuming rituals every day before I'm allowed out of the house, and I certainly refuse to kowtow to that. Of course, doing it for a special event is still part of being socially conditioned to think I have to be hair free and not natural, but at least I'm aware of that when choosing to do so now I suppose, and happy and proud enough of my body as is to go out with hair everywhere and no make up on my face most of the time if I wish to. And I guess that is progress - am resisting compulsory femininity, if not exactly resisting femininity entirely I guess

Apparently there is a condition called 'Sudden Immersion Death Syndrome' iirc. Which does exactly what it says on the tin.

Hi everyone. Just wanted to delurk and say I had a little 'cogs turning' moment yesterday I wanted to share with you nice people.

I go swimming and don't bother that my legs/armpits aren't shaved. Go me, eh? Being not the brightest star in the sky, however, I realized yesterday I've been conscientiously going to the leisure centre dressed in jeans or long skirts or tights, all of which end up flicking onto the wet floor as I get changed. It didn't occur to me to wear a knee-length skirt and bare unshaven legs. Oops.

So now I will. Baby steps I know.

I quite like the idea of nude swimming in theory but in practice I think I would have to wear bikini bottoms, I would be too worried about things approaching my nether regions

Yesterday I wore shorts with my hairy legs. Don't think anyone noticed, but I shaved them last night and felt all rejuvenated. I'm wearing a maxidress today though so nobody knows!

I have been thinking about this the last couple of days anyway and a thread in chat prompted me to post - I will mainly be resisting perfoming femininity by refusing to pay to have my face cut or injected merely because it is the face of a 40-.50-,60-,year old.

It does worry me how normal these invasive procedures are seen as now, I may not feel as confident when I'm the only 50-year-old with wrinkles...

There were some photos of Kate Moss in the DM today (they were saying she looks fat whatever). She is aobut 37 now I think and doesn't appear to have had any "work" done apart from teeth whitening, hair dye/a few extensions and some makeup and she looks great - her skin probably looks "older" than many women her age due to her smoking but who gives a monkey's? She looks happy, she was laughing in one photo and eating sweets in another. I hope she resists the lure of the surgeon and wears her (extraordinary) life on her face. I've never thought of her as role model material but this is an area where she really could be.

Just thought I'd post after lurking and say I am taking my unshaved legs to the park with DGC!
I am 'too old' to be regarded as suitable for policing by the male gaze so not that brave really

Pah! It is the natural endorphins produced by your body to deal with agonising pain.

oh I bet they get an amaaaaazing high afterwards Stewie

there's a thread on Style and Beauty about someone who had their eyebrows waxed and it was too hot and now their skin is burnt

the cold is part of the point though isn't it?

do you think our hairy legs will insulate us much?

I stupidly put some tights on today to go to dd's school puppet performance and firstly it was hot and sweaty, secondly I was sitting with people who are my mates anyway, and thirdly the velcro from ds2's sandals kept catching on them.
that told me. 15 denier nylon tights are just stupid. bloody things.

SSM I have not done December (although dh did the Hampstead ponds this December - brrrrr) but March I've done and plenty cool enough it was :)

Ooh Seth! I have lovely memories of wild swimming in the lake district and West coast of Scotland. Hot, sweaty, midge-ridden bodies plunging knot icy cold zingingly fresh mountain streams tasting of peat and turquoise sea on White sand that makes you shout with the cold. Bliss! wish my family weren't such townies

I think this woman needs to get with the project:

Mother obsessed with pink

are we going to discover a correlation between wild swimming and compulsory femininity resistance?

I don't actively seek out nude swimming but I tend to immerse myself in random bits of water when I find one I like, freshwater more than sea probably because it goes with dh being into hillwalking. Sometimes I don't have a swimsuit with me so I just go in nude. Sometimes there are people around, sometimes not. If it is the middle of winter I always think they're probably more interested in the fact that I'm actually going into the sea in December than what I might or might not be wearing.

is it wrong to be smiling about a wolf-whistle?

unrulysun - yep, Studland. Fabulous beach, and NT run so the naturist bit is very official rather than you feeling a bit naughty like on many of the unofficial ones. In the summer they have a little mobile cafe at the naturist bit - fully clothed student summer workers serving icecream and tea to a mixture of clothed and naked people without batting an eyelid :) So you can get refreshments in the middle of your swim!

It's very popular and nice to go as a family as you don't feel like the only naturists in the village :) And it is a glorious sandy beach too.

If anyone is interested, there are two great books called Bare Beaches and Bare Beaches Europe which detail loads of naturist friendly beaches. They tend to be clothing-optional rather than naked-mandatory :o so you can wear clothes if you don't want to strip and if nothing else it is just nice to be able to change from swimming costume into clothes without having to contort yourself under a towel :o