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Original poster

'That' thread....

114 replies

Janos · 04/02/2011 19:19

You probably know which one I'm referring to.

I have found it very upsetting to read because I have been in an almost identical situation to the OP :(

I was raped by a so called friend - it happened several years ago. I won't go into the details because I find it too upsetting to talk about. Suffice to say it was a bloody horrible experience.

I have been so distressed by some of the attitudes on that thread on that thread, but also heartened (if thats the right word) to read the comments from Rhadegunde, Dittany, IngridBergman, Blinder and others (sorry if have missed anyone out).

I don't feel able to post on there but wanted to say a heartfelt thank you. I'm glad there are women like you out there.

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Rhadegunde · 06/02/2011 21:33

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HerBeX · 06/02/2011 19:36

I expect s/he didn't read all the posts - just the first one.

IngridBergmann · 06/02/2011 13:14

The ultimate irony really is that folk opening that thread and reading top down will not take any notice of billy boy, because in the light of the discussion he's just a peasant coming in at the end and looks stupid.

Reading from the end of the thread, though, I imagine most people would look at that post and go 'WTF?!' and dive in and see the real story.

It's so ridiculous and provocative that it isn't going to just be accepted as the punchline in a thousand post thread.

I reckon it might work out.

but seriously what a tw*t Grin

Rhadegunde · 06/02/2011 12:14

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Original poster
Janos · 06/02/2011 10:57

Yeah I saw that too, very nasty. Have asked mnhq to delete it so can't hurt.

OP posts:
Rhadegunde · 06/02/2011 08:42

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FlamingoBingo · 05/02/2011 19:33

See! I told you all!

Thanks for posting, QLB. I didn't post on the thread - I don't know enough yet, but I did try and encourage the posters on here when they were feeling disheartened because I knew that even if it touched one person, it would make a difference. I'm really pleased you were able to come here and say what you said.

And I'd like to say that, although I already agreed with everything you feminist lot were saying, I didn't know enough to argue it myself and I've learnt loads so thank you for sticking with it.

IngridBergmann · 05/02/2011 19:01

Oops, Coleys. I think I just did that for you Grin

HerBeX · 05/02/2011 18:53

QLB another thanks. Just one post like that makes it all worth while.

AliceWorld · 05/02/2011 18:44

Just wanted to add to the thanks. You are doing such an important thing.

Coleysworth · 05/02/2011 18:25

Yeah I saw that one too and was sooo tempted to say something facetious (but managed to resist)

Rhadegunde · 05/02/2011 18:20

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Coleysworth · 05/02/2011 17:59

Someone else has just posted to say that dittany's posts had caused them to rethink :)

IngridBergmann · 05/02/2011 17:57

I can't even bear to read it now Dittany! Some of it was quite traumatic wasn't it.

QuickLookBusy · 05/02/2011 17:43

Thank you for all your kind commentsSmile

dittany · 05/02/2011 17:41

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IngridBergmann · 05/02/2011 17:33

QLB, that was brave of you and very good of you to post.

I'm really, really pleased about what you have just said - it means an awful lot, in fact it's fairly critical to hear that sort of thing because like yesterday, when you're fighting a massive flaming for daring to speak the truth as you see it - with no grudge to bear or agenda to enforce - it can be very stressful and very difficult to continue in the face of people who reject everything you write.

So it does mean a great deal that it changed your mind.

Thankyou.

dittany · 05/02/2011 17:21

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Original poster
Janos · 05/02/2011 16:58

Thank you forposting QLB :)

Malificence that situation with your BIL sounds hellish.

OP posts:
LadyBiscuit · 05/02/2011 16:51

QLB - thank you so much for posting that. However difficult personally I found 'that' thread, I'm really heartened to know that some of what was posted has made a difference.

It is a really difficult subject and one in which the status quo is so ingrained in all of us, I think it's something that needs a lot of deep thought to come round to a different way of thinking.

(apologies if that sounds at all patronising)

vesuvia · 05/02/2011 16:13

It was good to see even non-feminists challenging rape myths on that thread.

SardineQueen · 05/02/2011 16:01

Thank you for posting quicklookbusy, it is nice for the people who post on those threads, presenting a different POV and challenging rape myths, often using personal experiences, to know that what they have said has made someone stop and think Smile

Coleysworth · 05/02/2011 15:53

Gah, x posted. What dittany said.

Coleysworth · 05/02/2011 15:53

It seems to me that the OP was faced with a split second decision to resist or not resist rape. Resistance might have scared him off, but it might have provoked additional violence. When someone has already shown that they can easily overstep the boundary of acceptable behaviour by completely ignoring a clear "I'm not interested", who knows what the hell else they might do.

dittany · 05/02/2011 15:50

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