New(ish) to feminism and want to pack it in already

But er, nobody had given you any shit when you were rude Mrsjoyful.

And this thread isn't the place to discuss it is it? Isn't there a thread on this very issue being discussed, I'm sure I've seen one in active convos.

MrsJoyfulPrize - no-one has specifically mentioned name changing or using Mrs as opposed to Ms. You seem to have an issue about this.

My reading of this is that you seem conflicted. You are widely read on feminist issues yet feel the need to raise the issue of your name change twice on a thread which is about Annie's feelings about feminism and to defend it to us.

If you are feeling conflicted about it, why attack Annie?

OK. Someone explain how I am making myself unequal to men by choosing to give myself the same name as those I love most, as opposed to my father's family which consists mostly of people for whom I have no real affection.

I consider myself to be entirely equal to any man. I am at least as well-educated and capable as any man I know. I once walked out of a job interview (for a job I really wanted) because one of the panel insisted on asking me if I was single and if I had plans for a family, and wouldn't let it go. I couldn't work for someone who would even ask that.

I have read The Female Eunuch, The Whole Woman, The Second Sex, The Beauty Myth, Beauty and Misogyny etc. etc. so I vaguely know something about feminism. I resent being patronised because of a choice I have made by someone who either can't be arsed or doesn't know how to respond.

I don't take shit from men, and I don't take it from women either which is why I was rude.

Totally agree, Edam. How many times have I heard that argument from people who are doing absolutely nothing in their own lives outside their own sphere!

And thanks, StayFrosty. I guess my energy comes from the anger I feel. Knowing that I'm doing (or trying to do) something constructive with it helps me to manage it.

Where are you based, Annie? There's a lot going on in Bristol. We need all the energy we can get! I am about to coordinate some work on SEV licences for the 5 or 6 lap dancing clubs in Bristol, for example.

I wonder if we can hook you up with some other feminists nearby? I have feminist friends around the country who are desperate for support with some of the things they are doing.

I have to say that I am surprised at the rudeness you've encountered on here. But, as Rhadegunde said, that was a full house in feminist bingo, and only in a few posts!

Funny the way people who rock up to say 'why do you care about this, it's not important' are always so full of ideas about what you should spend your time on. If domestic violence is such a pressing issue for Mrsjoyful, why isn't she doing something about it, instead of spending her time knocking Annie?

And why can the person who asks this sort of non-question not understand that it is possible to care about more than one thing - even where those things are clearly linked by an underlying theme?

Annie - I feel your pain!! And I meant to say that I was at a feminist event tonight not "last year". It was great to be surrounded by all that energy.

I do know exactly how you feel. I've had this discussion with friends of mine in which we've said how lovely it would be to go back to the time before the scales fell from our eyes. Ignorance is bliss and all that. But unfortunately, once they're off, there's no putting them back.

I spent about 2 years feeling completely angry but have calmed down a bit now. I try to have times when I do nothing related to feminism just to have a break as it's very easy to get burnt out feeling all this anger.

However, be consoled by the fact that, now you have had your eyes opened (if that doesn't sound too patronising!) you can at least do something about advancing the feminist cause.

And one day perhaps we won't need feminism anymore (she wrote, optimistically).

Can we help you mrsjoyfulprize?

Have you lost your way?

I believe Annie posted a link in her first OP, that might be of help to you in finding the thread you're looking for.

Also honing your arguments on t'interweb means in RL you don't actually get tht angry because you've heard it all before

'sane'

Annie just keep going and make your voice heard where you can. No point getting angry, it's very counter productive. Just do your best to educate the next generation in your family, where your voice will be heard. You only need to look at the Chat topic about discrimination in the workplace to know that sexism is alive and kicking here on MN.

mrsjoyful, why don't you make your points on the happy wife thread, as this one is about how to be sane when surrounded by idiots?

Sigh, indeed...

Annie, I agree with Jess, the best thing is to network with other feminists, so that you find a place of sanity at least once a day! Come to MWR march, join the FB group, link up with like minded women and feel that solidarity whcih keeps you going.