Does your 'gaze' age with you? (Really this one's for the over 30s)

Angry lack of spell check there!

HATE the term cougar....wish people wouldpiss off and not compare womn to animals.

I'm 38 and I do find myself admiring guys in their late twenties...manly but not past it! However...unless I were suddenly single I can't see myself going after one of them...thouh the thought is pleasing!

TBH I don't think that younger men are more prone to being judgemental about women's bodies / talking down the pub than older men.

Some men will act like that whether they're 20 or 60 (because they're arses) and some men won't.

I have been out with quite a few younger men - not loads younger as I'm only 37 now, but 23 when I was 30, that sort of thing, and it was all fine. If anything they were very keen and eager to please while some of the men I dated who were more my own age or a bit older were shockers.

Down to the bloke not the age IMO.

I think the reason that more older women are getting together with younger men is because women are becoming more financially independent and confident, and women in those positions are starting to be able to enjoy what lots of privileged men have enjoyed forever ie young attractive partners. I do not believe that women are genetically programmed to fancy overweight bald men who are 30 years older than them - that's to do with power and money. Swap it around and we start to see some interesting results which have some of the papers in a total tizwoz.

I very rarely fancy men on sight alone. I can fully appreciate a beautiful man but only on very rare occassions would I fancy them before having at least a conversation or getting to know them.

So I think my "gaze" has aged with me as I just can't imagine having a decent conversation with a 20 yr old to the extent it would make me want to sleep with him. But there again when I was 20 I didn't sleep with any 20 yr olds either! They were generally older. So in fact my gaze has become much more in line with my age as
I've got older!

Antal, 'trend' because of celebrities like Demi Moore and Melanie Griffith with much younger men.

Antalya, I think it's just more socially acceptable now, for younger men to be with older women.

So they are.

And also, there are a lot more divorced older women around. The pool is bigger, so to speak.

And another thing - you don't have to marry someone now and plan to have children and be with them forever, in order to have a relationship with them anymore. So it is possible for a younger man to choose to enter into a relationship with an older woman knowing that he hasn't given up every chance of having his own biological children. And it's possible for an older woman to choose to be in a relationship which may be only for two or five or ten years, and still be valid and life-enhancing. Years ago, those choices just weren't available.

I find (at 30) my gaze has broadened.

I still look at the young 'uns (20+), but I'm increasingly looking at older men in "that way".

I love feeling that there is a whole new type of man who tickle my fancy.

I just wish when I was young and single I had been with (much) older men. I didn't think they'd look twice at me, but in retrospect they probably would have.

I'm with a 26yo now, and look forward to growing old with him and boffing a silver fox in a few years. I appreciate his toned loveliness atm though.

I'd still insist on the lights being off, with no touching or foreplay, and would dressed straightaway afterwards. The thought of my less than firm bits being mocked later in the pub....ouch

blueshoes...is that what it is a trend?, when I was in my 20's, all of my male contemporaries were with women of their age, but now I have noticed more and more men attracted to older women. I have a male work colleague, in his mid-twenties, intelligent, good-looking, witty etc. etc. who really does seem to have his pick of the girls, but the woman that has really bowled him over is 41!

I had a friend who was once worrying about how her backside looked in a g-string (she liked wearing them with trousers). I pointed out that by the time a man gets that far, he's really unlikely to care...

Owwww, my eyes, my eyes

Now <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=images.wikia.com/merlin1/images/d/d1/Anthony_Head.jpg&imgrefurl=merlin.wikia.com/wiki/Anthony_Head&h=340&w=282&sz=35&tbnid=AU0Ma4pfLmqoEM:&tbnh=119&tbnw=99&prev=/images%3Fq%3Danthony%2Bhead&zoom=1&q=anthony+head&hl=en&usg=__iga0lfwEw27U3-Zv4rqAmXpzDdU=&sa=X&ei=IrIfTezXAse7hAePvIy3Dg&ved=0CDgQ9QEwAw" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this is much better...

Oh I'm sure they don't give a shit about stomachs really....

But really, how can you possibly be so fussy about <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/8700000/Sweet-Arthur-bradley-james-8787845-624-352.jpg&imgrefurl=www.fanpop.com/spots/bradley-james/images/8787845/title/sweet-arthur&usg=__-BgRCWUlExUIMbfkFe7L7xcEYPY=&h=352&w=624&sz=26&hl=en&start=49&zoom=1&tbnid=aMI67wNWC8VbvM:&tbnh=107&tbnw=189&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbradley%2Bjames%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1579%26bih%3D639%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=1094&ei=P68fTYa_Gs6A5AaYjZXwCw&oei=_K4fTYDaLZKShAeN_PC3Dg&esq=3&page=3&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:18,s:49&tx=91&ty=65" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Arthur's laryngeal prominence The rest of him more than compensates...

What about the 'cougar' trend of older women and younger men.

I'm not a skinny-minnie and my pubes seem to have to extended to my face

This is really interesting to find this thread as it's something that I've given some thought to over the last few months since I've been single.

The men that I seem to attract are so much younger late 20's/30's, whilst men my age seem to go for significantly younger women. I had wondered if it was an 'ego' thing with the older ones..the 'look what I can still pull'?

Isn't there some bollocks about them being "programmed" to go for fertile looking ie young women (which presumably rules out skinny minnies with no pubes?)?

I wonder if the childbearing bit also comes into it - men subconsciously tend to look for women who are younger than them because women in their late 30s/40s are less fertile?

Otoh, it could simply be because they are shallow and immature....

So whilst most of us wouldn't rule out someone who was 'slightly' younger for any sort of serious relationship, why is is that so many men would consider a women who was significantly younger? That seems to be much more prevalent than women with much younger men. Are they really just so much more 'visual' creatures (dare I say shallow?)than us and put less significance on personality and shared experiences.

Make sure you come back on here and share your research findings!

I'd be too terrified that he'd see my slightly less than flat stomach and laugh. 20 year olds are shallow that way(iirc)

See I always have this doubt about shagging young men - I have all these prejudices abuot them being the porn generation (so possibly really crap in bed because of their sexuality being shaped by porn) and also them being young and therefore not knowing very much, so also possibly really crap in bed.

I'm just going to have to do some research, aren't I...

I wouldn't dream of going out with anyone under 30 - I'm 45. My "whateverthebloodyhellheis" is 8 years younger than me and has been kicking around for seven years. I haven't been out with/stayed in with anyone older than me for years. Men my age are fine but much older and they seem to have an attitude about women dating from the 70s. I can't be doing with that...

That was a terribly sweeping generalisation - it's only based on my experience and I'm not great a choosing men.

hmm. as an auld married i tend to look in a purely visual basis - i.e eye candy only. I'm not sure my gaze has caught up with me though - maybe because I was married in my mid 20's - my gaze has stalled at that age iyswim. Although i did tend to have a fairly flexible age range from 5 years younger than me to old gimmers like Steve Tyler.

I did feel a bit disturbed after looking up te all american rejects singer's age though. I still would though!