Do all women deny themselves for their families, or is it just mothers?

Women DO need fewer calories than men on average because on average they are smaller and number of calories needed does have a link to body size. And yes, my son eats more than my daughter because he has a bigger appetite and his 8 inches taller and 4 stone heavier. I am not going to put the same on each plate to have hers thrown away.

trillian male children do not need more food than female children. That is just wrong.

They have found that people subconsciously limit the amount of milk for female babies (she's greedy) while giving lots and lots to male ones (he's got a great appetite) haven't they. Don't have a link though, sorry. Will have a look.

and as for me personally - no i'm not the sacrificing type especially when there is absolutely no need.

i remember the painfulness and guilt as a child of trying to talk my mother into buying something for herself when she saw something. i think martyrdom is horrible to be around and a power game really.

this is making me think of d h lawrence's novel about mining town times. getting the male to hand over his salary (after they stopped women from working) could be hard work. he had to see that he was getting a good deal out of it and getting the best meal etc.

basically like it was a b&b and if you didn't serve the guest well enough they wouldn't pay board and would spend it in the pub instead.

i think it's to do with the money traditionally and the dependency of the woman on getting that money.

Blimey seriously girls do not need less food than boys. The reason they are given more is because is is seen as important that boys grow up "big and strong".

My gran always gave me about 1/2 as much food as my younger brother because he was a boy.

Seriously people give girls less than boys as a matter of course? What message does this send to girls? If my DD had her friend round (they are both 3) and I gave him two slices of pizza and her one, and told her that he gets more because he is a boy, what is that telling her? It's not good, really really it's not good. I can't believe people are doing this.

FFS Dittany

we are talking about maybe giving them one or two fewer roast potatoes (which they can have if they want!), not blimming STARVING GIRLS.

Go chill.

Women and girls do on average need about 1/5 fewer calories than boys and men. But we need to have a fair share of the 'good stuff'.

and I do NOT think giving men and boys more food is a feminist thing, on average men burn more calories, and eat more during the day.

Actually, this is a prejudice I suffer from, as I always get SMALL portions at people's houses, but have a fast metabolism so am starving later.

I somehow feel it is unladylike to eat 2 massive plates of food

so maybe it is a feminist thing

i try to give DH a bigger portion than me because he is about a foot taller, and male, and his calorie needs are much higher than mine.

when i was a student i ate the same as my male housmates and ended up a stone and a half heavier than i was.

i grew up in a very equal house - everybody got equal shares/slices etc.

I give my boys food first (best bits, bits they like, but also so it can cool down) and give DH a bigger portion than me, as he is 6ft4, cycles to work and is very sporty. I reckon he eats twice of what an average man eats.

As I need fewer cals, I will give myself a smaller portion (still a big plate of food though).

Am not a martyr! I always cook plenty.

Tomorrow, I will serve EVERYONE first, and will take what is left, as someone said above, if there isn't enough it would be MY fault, so always make sure everyone else has enough.

isn't it to do with, historically, that men went out into the fields/other physical labour and needed the strength to do the work needed, in order to bring in an income? so in many of our parents/grandparents generations that would still be true, that the man would be the breadwinner while the mother made the family home, which was in part to provide the food for the workers and growers (men and children).

My Grandma, during the war used to give her DC and my Grandad the meat and just eat the fat herself. So only she was doing the sacrificing basically - all a bit skewed really (my Grandad was a first class prick though from all accounts).

Well it certainly happens. I must admit I thought that the "giving the females less on principle" thing had died out though

ISNT - I know! I was trully appalled. There were obviously other abusive issues going on with regards to her father - but for some reason that one really hit home because it was so blatantly sexist and misogynistic.

I have never come across this idea before

My mother was/is like this. My sister and I have reacted in the opposite direction, dsis has a partner who does all the cooking, all the time. I very emphatically do not cook for DP unless I feel he's done half the cooking for me. I'll ostentatiously cook for me and the dds if I feel like it.

But dp wouldn't accept womanly sacrifice either, which is one thing I like about him. my mother (who feels sorry for him, being with a selfish feminist like me) tries to feed him up "Sit down, DP, you must be tired, have some more cake" and he loathes it.

xposted with you scallops that's appalling

Apart from anything else, like many of the DHs on here, my DH wouldn't have a situation where we were all hungry and I went without - he would offer me the whole thing and would not accept less than going halves with him.

I would do the same as snowflake in the hotdog situation too, assuming that everyone wants some, it would be the case that everyone gets some.

There are definitely more than one style of "going without" on here - the thing my gran did with the sexes included me getting about half as much as my brother - even though I was bigger (older) and we were both running around the same amount. The idea behind that is that boys are more important than girls, which is a bad message IMO.

snowy that handbag looks fabulous with the dress

I have a friend whose father would feed her brother the rest of her meal if he finished his dinner before her . She, understandably ate extremely fast and without much finesse! And needless to say she doesn't subscribe to the unequal portions theory!