Men 'buying rounds'

I've never come across this men insisting on buying rounds thing, or the assumption that women only drink halves. I DO only drink halves however, because I hate warm, flat beer and I often like variety so I like more, smaller drinks. But I always have to make this very explicit to anyone buying otherwise I'll end up with a big fat pint.

I very rarely drink pints but would resent anyone assuming that I don't. When out with friends and it is crowded we all tend to have bottled beer as it is easier to carry several bottles through a crowd than glasses, if the others are drinking faster than me I just skip a round.

I have noticed that with DH's old friends a tendency that if I offer to buy a round they all seem to feel slightly awkward about it, especially if I have been drinking less than them, but just have to go with it really.

God I would have been livid if someone automatically bought me a half of whatever I was drinking instead of a pint, especially if I had previously bought everyone pints! Fuck that for a game of prehistoric soldiers!

I have come across the situation where women in the group aren't "allowed" to contribute to the round-buying, but that has usually been where all the women present are in a couple and the other half is also present. When I have been out on my own with a social group (as a student, with my rowing club or whatever), no such petty chauvinism has occurred. However - if it is a large group, we have been known to "pair up" on rounds, to cut the costs and reduce the number of rounds.

Nowadays I tend to just buy my own, as do most other people. But I don't get out much now... and seeing that I'm in a different country, I don't know the people that well so wouldn't presume.

'What's bad is the assumption that women will only drink halves, or the idea what women must only drink halves because it's unladylike to have a pint.'

I just see it for me as when I hold a pint it is like a man holding a 4 pint of milk and drinking straight from that but I am tiny.

I like the idea of those little Spanish glasses. They are nice as they are small and as you say you dont have to drink loads. I doubt my bladder could handle a whole pint lol.

Yes Seren, totally agree.

I love the little canas you get in Spain - a tiny wee glass of lovely cold fizzy beer, then maybe another if you fancy. No commitment to sitting there for an hour while you bladder fills with wee.

spidookly I agree that it's weird to insist on buying everyone a drink whether they want one or not.

What's bad is the assumption that women will only drink halves, or the idea what women must only drink halves because it's unladylike to have a pint.

Women can drink whatever they like. Even bacardi breezers if they really want to.

trillian - agreed I would always go to bar in normal situations as I am a girl so get served really fast.

I also have 100% control of our finances so when we go out I would usually just pay with the card but all the money is the same money.

I agree with serendippy.

I drink halves (or glasses as they are called where I'm from) now. A whole pint at once just seems too much, and by the time I'm getting to the end it's all flat and gross.

I've had issues before with the English rounds system. It is a very complicated social ritual, and easy to mess up if you are not familiar. I've ended up with 4 or 5 pints sitting in front of me that I didn't know were mine, bought by people I didn't know I was in a round with.

Mostly I think it comes from a lovely, generous place but it can put people in situations where they feel obliged to spent more on drink than they want, or can afford.

Also some groups are arseholes - my cousin's ex, who didn't drink and so was always designated driver was expected by his friends to stand his round even though he was mostly drinking tap water.

I agree with the sentiment that everyone, regardless of gender, should expect and be expected to pay their own way.

I strongly object to 'and worse women who will only drink halfs.'

When I drink beer, usually in the summer, I only ever drink halves because I find it filling and don't know how much I am going to want. I find it offensive that you would judge a woman because of the quantity in which she chooses to drink. Not very 'freedom of choice', is it?

Hi BIWI - some of my friends have a theory that (as long as you are tall enough to see over the bar) women tend to get served quicker. Depending on the barman of course. He might fancy you, or he might take pity on you. If the barman looks gay, send your prettiest male friend

I wouldnt drink a pint of beer personally under any circumstances and everyone I know already would know that.

snowflake - you do realise you're in the feminist section, don't you?!

Oh, and it's 2010 over here - sounds like it's still 1950 where you are.

Women have been happily drinking pints/being bought pints for years.

I expect to pay my way, but DH will often buy two rounds for us as a couple if we're together - I will then pay for the meal when we go out afterwards for a curry/whatever.

I don't always go to the bar, especially if it's a really busy pub, simply because (as I am quite short at 5 ft 2), it's harder to get to the bar/get noticed at the bar!

So under what circumstances would someone buy you a pint of beer snowflake? Sounds very rude of them to me.

I am with OMDB - the only time when I or my friends would buy someone a drink without asking is if they:
a) had been drinking the same thing all night (at least 2x the same drink)
b) were not there to ask (had gone for a smoke or to the loo)
c) had indicated clearly that they were not planning on leaving yet
and
d) had an empty glass at the point when I was going up to the bar

overmydeadbody - my friends and I dont ever buy rounds.

It costs too much but sometimes in social situations in military you had to buy rounds and it mostly went if a woman said beer or cider it automatically meant they meant a half unless requested otherwise.

Well I wouldnt actually have a pint or half of beer personally. I would drink bacardi breezers or wine or something but I am talking about friends that would want a half but again I dont know many women that would drink beer they would maybe have a half of cider or a wine and lemonade.

And my friends who drink pints don't down them.

snowflake I have never been out and a friend has gone and bought a round without asking what everyone wants first. No one would ever buy me a pint of beer because that is not what I would ask for.

Do you really socialise with people who buy the drinks without asking first?

Oh, and I drink pints because then it's longer before you have to go get another. Halves = more time spent with an empty glass waiting for the next. I drink ale anyway so there's no such a problem if it gets slightly warm.

No-one is "downing" pints and it's funny that the size of a glass can elicit that kind of image. Would it help if I told you it was a small-batch locally-produced traditional ale, rather than mass-produced stong fizzy lager?

I'm with Trillian and Reality.

Never had a man refuse to let me buy them a drink.

'Fucking LOL at a pint making you fat but two halves being ok'

If you read what I have wrote I said I would give half away or save it whilst the others had more as most women dont drink as much. When I have been in that situation most women I know do say why the hell has whoever just bought me a massive pint and then we have to go to the bar and get another glass. Its just a known thing that women I know wouldnt want a pint so it is usually the circles you are in. It was even the same often when I served in the military.

Didn't see so well?

Didn't see very often.

I would do a kitty or stricter round-buying if I were with people I didn't know, or didn't see so well.

One friend (a regular on our ale-drinking nights) was v skint for a long time but didn't like to be indebted so he opted out of any rounds and only bought his own.

I've never come across this at all.

If I go out to a beer-drinking pub I will have pints. At the time when it feels as if it is your round you just buy a drink for whoever is ready for another drink at that time.

We on't do 'there are 8 of us so everyone must buy/drink 8 drinks' because we know we will see each other again the next week, and sometimes the beer karma is in your favour and sometimes you do get stung for a £25 round.