Why is "cocksucker" an insult?

Men think it is demeaning to suck their cocks. That's why they want women to do it.

The same applies to "fuck", which is also a word for sexual intercourse, which is frequently used as insult. Men want to fuck people they hate.

I listen to men.

Will probably refuse vaginal penetration and giving a man oral sex when/if I do get into a relationship.

At the very least he'd have to do a lot of work to convince me he doesn't view the sex act he wants to engage in as demeaning to a woman.

Lying is very hard. Most people find themselves accidentally saying the truth between the lines.

One just has to listen carefully.

There’s an episode of the sopranos where one of the characters is mocked when it’s found out that he gives his girlfriend oral sex. They explain that it’s because it’s seen as being submissive and unmanly, and any man who’d do that would probably like sex with men too

Women aren’t referred to as cock-suckers so it’s basically a gay slur.

shunt, not shut

Oddly, I suspect cuntlicker wouldn't work any more because men are given a view of sex in which they are expected to GIVE women orgasms (like they were machines) and that their masculinity is wrapped up in this (FHM always has advice of giving oral sex). Hence a cuntlicker in modern terms wight be seen as sexually successful and 'manly' (even if the absolute ideal is penetrative grunt and shut til gasps of pleasure magically occur slapstick).

What about 'twat'? Seems the only noun I can think of which crosses gender barriers (used of men predominantly, but refers to female genitalia).

Indeed, the submissiveness heightened by the heterosexuality-yielding to a man's pleasure less offensive than yielding to a (supposedly inferior) woman's.

Men are supposed to be heterosexually active predators. Cocksucking is supposedly insulting because it implies submission and gayness; wanking because it implies an inability to predate. Why men use words specifically about their own genetalia as gendered insults (cock, dickhead) I don't know, although there is a also a long standing trophe that manliness is about control-perhaps the suggestion is that reducing men to their dicks is offensive, that they should be actively in control of their own huge sexualities.

Interestingly, even Latin (and especially Greek) more commonly uses 'c*nt licker' as a rough equivalent-the submissiveness trumping the heterosexuality. Variations on a theme, though.

It has a double whammy isn't it. Can imply female or gay, both terrible insults to a certain sort of man.

But then, lots of insults convey the idea of a man as female - referring to someone 'crying like a girl' for example.

Well, if you are a male cocksucker, you're not getting your own cock sucked, are you? you are giving something away - being cheated.

Female cock suckers, of course, don't get any pleasure from sex anyway, so they simply have something in their mouths. It's not like they even have a cock.

I suppose it's submissive. Same reason that some men are terrified of being thought gay

What, is 'dickhead' about cockends? Not penises wobbling about on foreheads?

Seriously, I need to know. I have an unofficial role as slang-explainer to international students. I might need to devise a whole new set of descriptive gestures.

You can't overthink sexually-based crude insults though: most of them are based on the 'mouthfeel' of the word more than the meaning. Who means 'motherfucker' in all seriousness? And what about 'wanker'- who doesn't wank?

I honestly don't think the intent is merely the gay connotation.

It carries the same negative connection of any suggestion that a man assume the supposed "female" role in sex. It is tied to the general perception from a significant and unpleasant amount of society that since women are inferior to men, saying a man takes the role of a woman is insulting to him. It is doubly powerful because it's crudity rolls in all the hideous perceptions of sexually active (possibly even eager) women, which is that they are dirty, lesser people there to be used by men.

Essentially since society has put so much effort into identifying a womans role in sex as submissive and degraded, to suggest a man take that role is a pretty powerful insult.

that is indeed what boaby means. suck ma boaby being a particularly crude/amusing expression.

I agree that it's about being gay. 'Rug muncher' or 'muff diver' I have heard as lesbian equivalents.

no, because telling a man that he sucks other men's boabies is the worst insult in all of the world, if one is a moron. and there are pleeeeehhhenty of morons.

just a happy coinkydink.