If you were raped would you report it?

I probably wouldn't. I come from a pretty small town, where everyone knows everyone else. Although my friends know I wouldn't lie about something like this, there's always the whole stigma, the risk that I wouldn't be believed, the risk of being lied to, the intrusiveness of the questioning, haing my sexual history dragged up... I'd like to think I'd have the courage to do so, but I don't know that I would.

Someone said they'd tell some nice supportive men, then leave them to get on with it. Fair enough.

Also point out that false allegations of rape run at around 4% according to police figures and of those, most of them are from women with mental health problems who don't actually name a specific man, so it's not even as if they are damaging individual men with their false allegation.

Wantingvalium. I would ask him, why he shouldn't believe anonymous people on anonymous blogs. He's buying into the idea that women lie about rape, when what we know, is that men lie about rape - they pretend they didn't rape women when they did. Ask him why he thinks that women lie about rape and point out that he's buying into a mysogynist view of women as hysterical liars who don't know their own mind.

And also, I would challenge him on his assertion that they wish to do know more about their rapes, than report it on an anonymous blog. They'd like to do a lot more - kill their rapists for example. Or at least report the rape to the police and get justice, but they know that's not going to happen, so that's why they don't report. 6% conviction rate on reported rapes, with the threat of being sent to prison for lying if you're in the 94% who doesn't get a guilty verdict. It's not that women don't want to report rape, it's that they can't.

OP -
Used to be a maybe, now probably not. A friend was on the jury of a rape trial and he was in the minority in thinking (on what he thought was strong evidence and the victim's testimony) the accused was guilty. Two younger female jurors didn't think he could've raped the woman because he was too good-looking to have to do that. The man was found not guilty.
Reading this thread confirms to me that I probably wouldn't.

well if the thread is anonymous and I'm guessing no names are mentioned than how can it be slander? no-one knows who is being slandered??

or am I wrong??

Sorry, old thread.

''I see.
So these women who have been raped, simply say they have been raped but wish to do no more about it than report it later in anonymous blogs. And we should simply believe them. You have to be kidding, don?t you?
In no way am I suggesting they are being dishonest, however slandering anyone under these circumstances is very dangerous. I was led to believe that lynching was outlawed over there some time ago.

If it is true that women still have their sexual history etc exposed in a rape case then that is abominably wrong in my opinion. Moreover, pressure should be brought to bear on the judicary to change the procedures.''

Do any of you know how to respond to this? I would hazard a guess that the reason that women hardly ever report rapes is opinions such as this.

I am not sure how to even start educating the twonk who said this.

Sorry, meant to end with hope this has helped.

earwicga from a professional perspective I would like to say that I think things are changing in many forces so that the right people will be doing the job. I know that a lot of forces are setting up specific units to deal solely with adult rapes, which is what is needed (child abuse investigation is a whole other ball game). The problem you have is that throughout any job, you get people who are excellent and people who are inadequate........ unfortunately if you get an inadequate officer investigating your horrific incident of rape it has a knock on effect. What I would say is that complainants need to speak out if they feel they aren't being given the best treatment. There are guidlines in place which must be adhered to, in order to give victims a positive service. I am not saying I'm supercop, obviously I make mistakes, I am human, but my victim care is second to none and I think that is one of the most important aspects of this kind of work. I think honesty is the way forward, I don't lie to my complainants. If I think something is going to be hard to prove, I tell them. If it is going to be bumpy ride or a lengthy investigation, I tell them. I think too many officers forget that complainants are humans with a brain, not a cardboard cutout that can be told any old pile of poo.

In terms of the questions re. Platos list. I am going to re-read the posts on that and have a think. Part of me thinks it is a great idea, but then the other side of me thinks it is a tad unrealistic (purely from a Data Protection/Human Rights perspective).
H

NikNak69 I have PMd you.

Nancy19 You can write directly to the Chief Constable for the force, or email if it is easier - you can't get any higher than that. The force website will tell you who the Chief Constable is and how to contact them.

Name the officer and why you think they did such a good job. I do think it's a good idea. To be honest with you, the majority of officers don't think about getting thanks from the complainants/families as they just do the job, but it is always nice when your hard work has been recognised. I'm sorry that your daughter went through this in the first place, but glad to hear that she is coping with it well - she should be proud of herself.

Hi everyone, I am so sorry that I disappeared. My computer at home died on me and I can't get on to Mumsnet on the one at work. I assure people I am real, I am a regular on Mumsnet and and I am a real police officer. I am just having a look at my PMs and other questions and will answer them asap. Sorry sorry sorry again!! Didn't mean to disappear.

goldencarp, I've just read your post seeing as I somehow missed a page here, that is an awful, awful story, although I'm glad to see you got him in the end, how horrible to have to fight for a conviction like that

I'm so sorry NikNak69, that sounds hellish.

We are currently going through this at the moment, my daughter was raped in April this year,I'm not sure she would have reported it but she told her best friend immediatly and then all hell broke lose and the police were called. It then took 5 months for them to charge him which have been extremely harrowing for her as they attended the same school during this time the police have constantly failed to update us and we have heard all sorts through the grape vine whilst trying to get hold of the officer in charge.He has just had his first court appearance and we should have been updated within 24 hours....its now well over that and surprise surprise no update. My poor daughter is really struggling with everyday life and is petrified of attending court, so knowing all this I can see why people wouldnt want to report it...although the only way to increase convictions is to try to get more cases recognised and through the legal system

ok, will try to relax then.
was starting to panci that she is a hairy trucker that gets off on reading about other peoples misery.

(Sorry backintraining!!!)

yes she is a regular

\m feeling nervous about backintraining.
Sent her a PM and now she has gone, is she a regular?

backintraining are you around still?

backintraining - I have PM'd you, hope you don't mind.

It is incredibly sad how many of you have been raped, and then have not been believed/able to get any kind of conviction. It's digraceful.

backintrainig so what do you think of Plato's list - a proper recording of allegations, allegations made with no prospect of individual prsoecution, but to notice patterns.

could that work?
does anything like that happen?
if so should it be better publicised?

Backintraining - the police dealing with my dd2's rape handled it superbly - can't praise them highly enough - and i'm convinced it has made a great difference in how my dd2 is coping and moving on with her life - however I believe the CPS let her down in the presentation of the case and cross examination. We were thinking of writing to the the police station to thank the officers concerned for their support. Is that a good idea? Who do you think would be the best person to address the letter to (which rank)? I would really like it draw it to the attention of a senior person rather than writing directly to the officers concerned as i know that generally the police get a very bad press about all this.