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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Victims of Violence

519 replies

Treats · 19/10/2010 12:57

So - this is the first thread I've started within the Feminism section, but I'm a long-time lurker and occasional poster.

I've been motivated to start a thread by this story from last week, and then also by this both in the last few days. (There was another one too but i can't find the link at the moment).

Every few weeks, it seems to me from reading the newspapers, a woman is killed by her husband or lover. Sometimes her children are harmed too.

My DH would like to argue that every single murder is an isolated incident, and caused entirely by factors only relevant to that one man. I argue that these cases are manifestations of misogyny, and that these are not isolated examples, but are all linked. He finds this an uncomfortable point of view, because of what it suggests about him, about us, about our friends.

I think that misogyny is similar to an epidemic - say, swine flu. It's infectious. It affects a significant proportion of the population, but not all. Of those affected, only a minority are severely affected. But it can be fatal - not for the sufferer, but for those close to them.

I don't know how many others here agree with me, but I do see a number of posts from some people who most definitely wouldn't. So the thread I want to start is to collect examples of victims of misogynist violence - women who were killed because they subverted their husbands and boyfriends desire to control them. I want people who visit this board with doubts about why feminism is necessary and justified to read my thread with its examples of victims and to start joining the dots for themselves.

Those posters who think that misandry is equivalent to misogyny are free to post their examples too (of women killing men).

If this thread (or something like it) already exists, then please point me to it and I will post there.

OP posts:
Prolesworth · 20/04/2011 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

AyeRobot · 19/04/2011 14:23

Robin Garbutt has just been found guilty, E&M.

As yet unnamed woman in Southampton

AyeRobot · 12/04/2011 16:07

Nicky Ward

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 08/04/2011 01:39

And an as yet unnamed 55 year old woman from Turton, stabbed to death.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 08/04/2011 01:37

Not sure if anyone else has posted about Diana Garbutt

Treats · 05/04/2011 16:27

Sorry AyeRobot - I didn't see that you'd already posted that.

OP posts:
Treats · 05/04/2011 16:26

Paula Fields and Melissa Halstead And they're trying to trace three other women that he was in a relationship with.

They've also named the other victim in the Sian O'Callaghan case Becky Godden Edwards

OP posts:
vesuvia · 05/04/2011 16:13

This sad thread of violence and tragedy sends shivers down my spine every time I see that it has been updated.

AyeRobot · 05/04/2011 13:48

Becky Godden

InmaculadaConcepcion · 29/03/2011 20:17

The poor little lad. I'm guessing that was his mum and gran.
Sad

mdavza · 29/03/2011 20:01

here

mdavza · 29/03/2011 20:00

Tracey and Louise Donnelly. Just shocking. See [[www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-12892416 here]

dittany · 27/03/2011 19:35

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mdavza · 27/03/2011 13:17

bump

mdavza · 19/03/2011 20:11

All this is Sad
Here in Scotland domestic violence peaks after big football matches.

AyeRobot · 19/03/2011 15:09

Denise Skilbeck

Sad
sakura · 19/03/2011 12:35

I'm fed up of societies giving men the benefit of the doubt, I really am. these are not bizarre incidences. they're practically the norm. It doesn't take much for men to be granted the "good father" stamp of approval, and this is why

sakura · 19/03/2011 12:32

I'm so angry that patriarchies force women to let fathers look after their children. they're not the father's children, they're the mother's children. INcidences like this drive the difference between mothers and fathers home. men don't carry babies, they don't give birth to them. In many cases, they are emotionally detatched.

HandDivedScallopsrgreat · 19/03/2011 12:23

Oh god, dittany that is horrendous. The complete arsewipe fucker! (I can't actually think of word strong enough to describe him). How can anyone do something like that? It is out of my realms of understanding it really is.

sakura · 19/03/2011 12:10

I bet the mother knew he was a nutcase but the courts forced her to let him have contact

dittany · 19/03/2011 12:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FruitbatAuntie · 19/03/2011 11:21

Nicola Holden, murdered by her husband last week just down the road from me.

Apparently they were having some 'marital difficulties' which, as everyone knows, makes it perfectly understandable when your husband decides to strangle you. Just couldn't help it, you know?

mdavza · 16/03/2011 20:09

Jia Ashton, murdered in Derbyshire by a male suspect.

InmaculadaConcepcion · 15/03/2011 19:23

Jeez, this is an upsetting thread.
Really worth doing, though.

These are the dramatic deaths. I wonder how many are indirectly killed by spouses/boyfriends/exes etc.?

Example: a dear friend's sister died of alcoholism. She became an alcoholic when in an abusive relationship and never managed to put it behind her.

That man was indirectly responsible for her death. And I bet the example I've given isn't uncommon. I bet there are thousands of woman driven to drink/drugs/suicide because of abusive treatment from a man they thought they loved.

Sad

So many lives ruined. Bastards.

BingBongSong · 15/03/2011 11:46

Lisa Whyte, whose ex-fiancee stabbed her in the neck.

He has been jailed for at least 10 years. The court heard he was trying to kill himself after she called off the wedding, when she got in the way.

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