Stupidities and irritations in novels

and it is not about finding books annoying but things in books authors use that are annoying.

it is the stuff of book groups though isn't it 100 - where you all get together and rip a book to shreds (not literally - no pun intended)

this thread is born from such activity - and also probably quite useful to writers.

This thread is a bit narky.

Who has time to read books they find annoying? Now, what on earth is the point of that?

I haven't read any Chick LIt I don't think, I might have read one. But presumably they are successful because people like or are comforted by the formula? And they were quite new once I suppose, and then everyone published to try and capture the same market. Fair enough, doesn't mean you have to read them. Also doesn't mean that anyone shouldn't write them imho.

If you stand in front of a table in Waterstones there are hundreds of individual voices in front of you, from around the world. If they won't do - walk six steps and look on a shelf.

There are so many books out there - why do people keep reading books they find annoying with protagonists who talk about their clothes size?

Read something else. Something you will enjoy.

I hate dissing threads, especially ones about books. UQD you do start these quite a lot it seems to me. Why?

being friends with writers can be quite irritating if they are pedantic about detail.

I remember going out for a lovely lunch where my dear friend asked me to have the bouillabaisse and describe it in great detail as he didn't eat fish but wanted to put it in his next book. He even took notes.

OK Springy, here we go. Sorry if this is a hijack.

Gordon flicked back his greying yet boyish fringe, and gazed across the panelled room at the eager undergraduate perched on his sofa. My god, the gown suited her, especially as her black stockings peeking out from underneath gave a foretaste of extra curricular interests to come.

"That was a very good essay, Miranda, a very good essay indeed. I think we'll have to be thinking about postgraduate studies for you in a year or two. Now, you wanted me to look at this funding application of yours? Why don't you bring it over and we'll see how it's shaping up?"

The mantelpiece clock ticked. In the distance there was the clatter of a trolley taking dishes over to the Refectory for Formal Hall that evening. Miranda looked at him innocently and uncrossed her long legs very slowly. Little did Gordon know that buried within her voluminous undergraduate gown was a special hi-tech transmitting device, designed by a couple of CompSci postgrads, streaming the entire tutorial over the internet to subscribers. Gordon was about to become the victim of a new student entrepreneurship experiment ...

Oh yes, too much research thrown onto the page just to show off is terrible. Gave up on The Interpretation of Murder even though it was for my book club and I usually make the effort.

Too little research is just as irritating, though. I have always refrained from writing to the author because that would be taking pedantry too far, but strikes me as bloody lazy to fail to check the facts when you are charging people for your insights.

I've catted you UQD. My first time. How long does it usually take? I need an answer NOW.

Patience is not my strong point!

Yes yes on the typos. That always frustrates me too. Don't they have people to check this stuff!?!

Ooh SpringySunshine - that is so true! I trained as a typesetter and I am outraged at typos and shoddy editing!

I read a "literary" book a while back where a minor character completely name-changed! I can't remember what it was - I was outraged!

Typos are a menace with small publishers.

I did actually start writing a serious historical novel about ten years ago, and spent a year in the British Library on and off, doing some really hard core research, plus doing some international travel to research sites.

It was so bloody awful written up that it has become a joke amongst my relatives and the few friends I dared to show it to. They still snort with laughter when they quote bits of it.

I can't be too cross with them as it is truly dire, I must confess, and even makes me laugh. I read too much Anya Seaton as a teenager, clearly.

Anything you want to know about Caribbean childbirth practices in the 1600s, by the way, and I am your woman ...

Just checked your website UQD - looking forward to 'A' next year ...

No, more irritating than lots of research, is lack of research! Inappropriate referencing of other cultures/countries is my particular bugbear. Also happens a LOT in journalism - I understand you're writing for the Times (of London), but really, please take the time to understand the basics of the culture you're writing about before pontificating.

I see it with Africa. But I'm sure if you're Chinese/South American/japanese whatever you spot such ridiculous analogies.

That was meant to say 'excerpt'

£200? How rubbish...

Go on, give us an except of some academic porn

On topic ....

My particular gripe is "information retrieval" novels, where the whole raison d'etre of the novel is that it gives a view onto an experience about which people are at that time fretting; the necessary corollary is that it is underwritten by authenticity, especially the authenticity of the author.

I hat them for strange reasons; I think they're often given to acertain narrowness and triteness, which isn't immediately obvious, given thewhole "authenticity" thing and I think they're often marketed with a great deal of cynicism. Lastly, they are just so prone to the situation where the author is "outed" as not being authentic enough or authentic at all.

Having said that, I find myself reading them sometimes because they can be a light, easy way into a difficult problem.

I hate the typos you get in cheap books where there's clearly been little / no editing or proofreading. I know that's not really to do with the novel itself, but it's a good indication that it's not going to be one of the better things you've read all year.

the "I've done bagloads of historical research and by god I want you to know it" type novel that wears it's knowledge very heavily - like Interpretation of Murder by Jed Rubenfield.

I made £200 out of my last book, although tbh it was an academic book so that's probably good these days.

It's a bit sad when something takes you five years to write though, and gets good reviews, and that's all you get back financially!!

Perhaps I should start a new genre of academic porn to increase my earning potential.

UQD, perhaps you could enlighten us about "cubing".

During Mouldygate, the Indy journo who did such a great reporting job (okay - NOT) professed to practise cubing.

Is this just something journos and media hacks do? Or do proper writers do it as well?